Page 107 of Rocky Mountain Devil
“You choose not to forget.”
“Damn tooting, I don’t,” she snapped.
“So you’re going to ignore what’s best for you out of spite? That makes no sense, Laurel. Please don’t do that to yourself.”
She wanted to laugh in his face. “And I suppose you think you’re what’s best for me?”
“Yes,” he retorted. “And if you would stop being childish and start using your brain, you’d see that. Being unequally yoked with that redneck rancher is the last thing you need.”
She went even colder inside.
Jeff must’ve taken her silence as agreement, because he carried on. “You know, we had good times together. We’re compatible, and we share common passions and interests. We’ll make a great ministry team, and if none of that seems important right now, consider that your parents think we’re a good match.”
“They like liver and onions too, but you don’t see me jumping up and down to join them when they order it.”
He seemed shocked at her out-of-the-blue comment, but it was make a bad joke or scream at him for continuing to put her through this. She wanted it over. Needed him to get the hell out of her life.
Jeff caught her fingers in his. “Your parents want you to be happy, and have a place where you can grow strong. A place for you to be protected from the storms of life, and I want so much to be on your side for all of that. For the good, and the bad, and—”
Laurel backed up so quickly she nearly tripped over her own feet. “What do you know about being around to support people through the good times and the bad? I’ve seen no examples of you being supportive. In fact, what I saw was you focusing on your own needs to the exclusion of everybody else. Protective? More like tossing somebody into a storm and leaving them without a life preserver.”
Damn. She’d said more than she wanted to, but he was such a self-centeredbastard.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Jeff insisted. “But I want to know. Iwantto be there for you.”
She shook her head. “You had your chance. I’m not such a glutton for punishment that I want to ever risk trusting you again. Oh, and besides, I don’t need to. Ihavesomeone else in my life who has never let me down. I’m not about to throw away what I have with Rafe just because you’ve suddenly decide to develop a conscience.”
“I didn’t suddenly—”
“Jeff, stop.” Laurel was suddenly exhausted. “I don’t want to fight, and more talking isn’t going to change my mind. I forgive you, for everything you think you did, and all the things you don’t even know you did and I won’t tell you because it doesn’t make any difference now. The only thing that will make a difference is to move forward, and that meansyouneed to move on without me.”
He looked kind of stunned. Speechless, for once in his life.
Thank you for small mercies, God.
She dove back into it, praying he would get it this time. “I might see you because you work with my father, but if you have any feelings for me, stop going out of your way to put us into awkward situations. You will not arrange setups where we’ll be alone, and you willstoptrying to run my life.”
Jeff stared at her for a long time, his lips pressed together into a thin line.
Then,hallelujah, he nodded briskly.
Laurel grabbed her sweater from the nearby chair and left without looking back.
Shehadgrown strong. That was the point. Her world had turned dark and colourless for a while, but she’d survived and come out on the other side.
This was the moment she wanted to be with Rafe and let him know everything. It was time forallher secrets to come out—because she’d said a mouthful to Jeff.
Rafe had never let her down. She could trust him, and she needed to tell him that.
Leaving the church and heading to the rental, she felt an amazing cloud of calm surround her, and for the first time in a long time she was sure she was doing the right thing.
She felt…peace. And hope. And joy.
Okay, it’s up to you to deal with Jeff from here on, because I’m done,she informed God.
The lights were out at the rental, both Rafe’s and Jesse’s trucks missing from the yard. She was so full of plans she didn’t even care if Jesse knew she was sleeping over. It was past time pretending—as far as she was concerned, she and Rafe belonged together.
She let herself in and made her way to his room to grab a shower. When he wasn’t home by the time she’d dried her hair, she borrowed one of his T-shirts and crawled into his bed with her book to wait.
