Page 79 of A Rancher's Bride
Rose swooped to grab a boot. Tansy ducked as the chunky object flew past her head.
Kelli laughed softly. As usual, the sisters also tossed each other a quick air kiss and a finger wave before Rose closed the door.
Which left her and Tansy sitting in the suddenly quiet room.
It would have been easy to share some of what had gone down between her and Luke when both Fields sisters were there—the two who lovingly called each other twins even though they were adopted from vastly different backgrounds.
But while the three of them were friends, Kelli and Tansy had things in common at a more intimate level than anyone else. This conversation wasn’t going to be just—holy cow, you’re dating Luke—it would go deeper.
That was scary, no matter how much Kelli wanted it.
Tansy wiggled back in her chair before turning a knowing smile in Kelli’s direction. “You want to tell me what’s going on?” she asked. “If you say no, I won’t poke. You know that. Your secrets are your own. Even after you tell me, I will never share. I am the Fort Knox of Secret Keeperdom.”
Which was true. Until this past week and her confession to Luke, Tansy was only person who had heard the full story about Kelli’s past—she kneweverything, including the stealing money and running away. The only thing Kelli hadn’t outright shared was her crush on Luke.
Looking back, it appeared she might not have done as good a job of keeping the Luke part as secret as she’d thought. At least not around the female portion of the population.
Thank GodLukehad never suspected.
Kelli went, as usual, with honest. “I want to tell you about it, only everything is really mixed up and twisted in my brain.”
“Talk it out,” Tansy suggested. “I can take twisted.”
Words poured out of Kelli as if she’d broken through a dam.
“I went into the event thinking we might have a secret, short-term fling, but people there thought we were engaged. Luke had signed us up as a couple. I got mad at him for that, but then I kind of forced him tomakeus a couple anyway, and he didn’t get mad at me. And we had the most amazing time, not just the fling part—although,oh my god, that was wild—but the people were so nice, and Diane was fantastic. You would love her, and she would love you, but she thinks Luke and I are engaged, but we’re not, only”—Kelli took a deep breath—“when we got back, Luke said wearedating now and I’ve moved into his house, which sounds impossible when I say it like that. It can’t be real, and yet it is.”
Tansy’s expression was unreadable, but her eyes were bright, and she nodded sharply before replying. “Twisted is right. And I can see you’re in the middle of trying to find all the knots so you can unravel the mess. Figuring it all out. But it really doesn’t matter, you know.”
Kelli paused. “What doesn’t matter?”
“How mixed up the whole situation is. Because the important parts are clear.” Tansy leaned forward, her perceptive gaze piercingly bright. “You look happy. Likesuperhappy. And you’re usually a happy person to begin with, so whatever it is that’s going on with Luke is not hurting you.”
“I hate that we lied to people. And you have to promise you won’t say a word about the engaged thing to anyone. We definitely need to figure out how we’re going to explain that away.” Kelli felt her bubble of happiness fading. “Like I said, it’s twisted and a total mess. How can I be so happy and still feel miserable?”
“Because people are complicated and capable of feeling more than one emotion at a time?” Tansy shrugged. “I mean, really. That annoys the hell out of me.”
Usually it would have Kelli, too.
She paused. Thought it through. This time Kelli spoke slower, but with as much honesty as her earlier spew. “I’ve been pretending that all I wanted was a fling, but that was to protect myself in case I didn’t get what I really wanted. But I don’t know if what IthinkI want is what I really want, and until I untangle that part, I’m going to stay confused.”
“You don’t want a fling.” Tansy’s face stilled in concentration. “You want more. You want to be with Luke for real? You want to be with the St—Oh…”
Her friend was far too astute. Kelli let her misery out. “Tamara says I’m like family already. And Ihavehad a crush on Luke forever. But how much of me caring for him is because I’m crazy in love with Silver Stone and the Stone family? How much is because I can’t fathom living anywhere else? Because they’ve been my family for so long now? I needed a family so much when I arrived here.”
“Of course you did. We all do.” Tansy’s eyes flashed with indignation. “The woman who was your birth mother was not family. It’s not about shared blood. Family is about choice. One hundred percent. You know that.”
“Your family is a good example, I know. It’s just that…” Kelli paused. “I guess I don’t want to screw this up for anyone. Me, him or Silver Stone.”
“Oh, honey.” Tansy slid across the space between them. She sat on the coffee table and took Kelli’s hands in hers. “Do you love him?”
“I don’t know if I dare to love him,” Kelli admitted. “Because if he doesn’t love me back…”
She couldn’t finish.
Tansy wasn’t going to let it lie. “Because if he doesn’t love you back…what?”
“I might stay with him anyway because it means I would also be with the Stone family.” The words were a whisper. A confession of all her fears. “And while that’s not exactly the same as my mom, who stayed with guys who hurt her, it’s still not being around for the right reasons.”
