Page 20 of The Tsar's Obsession
“I have a nice dick; you should consider it.”Thatwas a fucking stupid thing to say, but Mia laughed, the angelic sound filling the room and the void inside me. She turned to her side and hugged a pillow. “Why is she so adamant? Are you into pussy and not dick?” I prompted with another foolish comment, keeping that smile on her face. She held the answer hostage for a full minute.
“No, it’s just that…” She kept her eyes shut, and I didn’t dare move, lest I scare her away from an answer. “I haven’t been with anyone in a really long time. Like, really long. And Viv’s just being Viv.”
Bingo. My diligent stalking of her life revealed that there was no relationship in her life for a while, and she hadn’t been seen with a man in a very long time indeed.
“Mm. How come?” I continued with my foot rub, enjoying how her skin felt in my hands.
“Didn’t want to,” she almost whispered. Then after a beat, “I don’t believe in love. In anything real. There’s no such thing.” Her eyes opened, and she stared into nothing, her answer stirring resentment inside me at whoever hurt her. Mia was made for love—to be seen, to be cherished, to let it wrap around her like something inevitable and true.
“Someone broke your heart,” I concluded, observing her intently.
But Mia said nothing else. She shared no more details. There were no more giggles spilling from her lips. Instead, her eyelids fluttered shut and her breathing slowed.
I stayed on the bed for a few minutes longer and watched her sleep, wondering how long it took me to get here. But this was it now. She was in my life. Whatever was happening between us was unstoppable, and I would enjoy it all, feasting on every single glance, touch, and hint.
Before leaving her to rest, I covered her with a blanket and placed a glass of water on the bedside table, resisting the urge to stay on her bed and stare at her all night.
Back in my office in the middle of the night, I ordered some green juice, snacks, coconut water, and other nonsense to arrive at her door first thing tomorrow morning. I would be there every step of the way, embedding myself in her mind, the same way she’d kept me hostage all these years.
Her words turned over in my mind when I finally climbed into bed;I don’t believe in love. In anything real. There’s no such thing.
But it was right in front of her.
Real.
9
Are you an angel?
Mia
Kirill: How’s the hangover, Miss Philophobia? K.
Thetextzingedstraightthrough my skull like a live wire. Jesus. I tried not to think about last night, and I blamed Viv—heavilyblamed her for sending that first text.
Did he drop a hundred grand to stay in that gelato shop? And then gave me a foot rub? And I showed him Viv’s text about riding his dick?
Fucking hell.
Slumped over my couch, I sipped on the green juice and texted with one thumb.
Mia: I would assume death feels like this.
It wasn’t all bad, though. His hoodie was still wrapped around me like a security blanket, the scent of him literally making me weak in the knees.
Kirill: Did you get my carepackage?
Ugh. He was so…so unforgettable. So sweet. So goddamn irresistible.
I could nurse my own hangover perfectly fine, and he knew that. I was a big girl; I ran my own business and had my own life. I didn’t need anyone. But for the first time in forever, Iwantedsomeone. Not just someone. One.
Mia: Yes, thank you. That was very sweet of you.
Mia: But also, it's weird that you were in my house. You tucked me into bed, we talked about your dick. You're my client.
Excitement swelled in my chest at these silly texts that I exchanged with a big, bad man. Hewasbad, wasn’t he? There was no way in hell he was a simple venture capitalist or whatever other nonsense he presented to me when we met. I indulged myself in a smile as I watched the little three dots appear, indicating that he was typing.
Kirill: Nonsense, I'm happy to discuss my dick anytime and I loved fucking you into bed.
