Page 49 of Bitten By Bloodmoon
“Dead,” Nyx says plainly, making me jump. I didn’t realize he’d come downstairs to the basement gym.
I look at him in his cold eyes. “It would end my pain and be better for the world.”
“If you say so, but I suspect it’s just a way to get out of our deal,”he says.
“Out of my head,” I say out loud, not bothering to respond to him when he talks in my head.
“She’s got a point; there is no way she’s fit to survive an attack. What’s the point of keeping her alive if one attack will end her? She can’t possibly be either of your mates,” Sylara says.
“So pragmatic, that’s why you’re my beta. But you’re wrong in this instance, Sylara,” Nyx says.
I study him closely as he glides across the floor. I have no idea why he believes what he does so strongly. But he doesn’t seem to be bothered by my complete lack of fighting skills, or that the others find me completely incapable of improving.
“You’ll get better. But you don’t have to worry about protecting yourself as long as you’re with me. Our deal ensures your survival.”
I look down at the small scar still on my finger where he nicked me so we could make a magical deal together, marked with our blood. Even now, I can still feel the shockwaves from that moment deep within my body, stirring around in my stomach like they have a life of their own.
“Out,” I say again.
“Force me out.”
“Out,” I say.
“Push me out,”he says again.
I sigh. Hating this dance we’ve fallen into.“I can’t just push you out, just like I can’t just become good with a blade in my hand. I’m not a killer.”
He blinks. If there is any sign I hurt him by inferring that he’s a killer, it’s not clear on his face.
“Both are skills. You can learn to become better at both with time and practice.”
“Does it matter if I’ll never be good enough to defend against a vampire? A witch? A shifter? Does it matter if I can learn to block you only for you to blast through my walls when you’re angry enough?”
And then he starts speaking aloud. “Yes, it matters. It all matters. There is a reason you were the one chosen to break the curse. Your strength is your bravery. You faced down a dozen vampires without a drop of fear in you.”
Talonis nods. “You did. I’ve never seen such bravery before.”
“It didn’t do me any good. If they decided to attack me, I’d be dead.”
“But they didn’t attack because you were brave. Because they saw in you what could make you a mate with someone like me.They saw your bravery and chose not to fight you. That’s your strength, but it’s not your only strength.”
I open my mouth to argue when he speaks again. “You believe the curse can be broken. You believe in mates. In love. In forgiveness. In the kindness of others. You’re willing to do whatever it takes, make any sacrifice necessary, to break the curse for others. That’s incredibly selfless.” He switches into my head.“Don’t let one heartbreak take your strength away from you.”
I look him dead in the eyes. He’s right. I shouldn’t let Ambrose take anything from me, but my heart hurts. It aches for something that never was and never will be again.
“Push me out,”he says in a mental stern whisper.
I grind my teeth, having had enough of his pushing. He feels cold in my mind, like winter’s breath mixed with a tinge of blood. It’s nearly impossible to untangle him from my mind and discern where he stands in relation to my own thoughts. The scent of metallic blood is the easiest clue to find him. I hunt that thread as hard as I can, finding where he’s clawed into my brain.
“Push me out, snow wolf.”
He’s everywhere. I don’t know how to push every thread out, every drop of him out of my mind.
“If you can push me out, you’ll be able to push him out. Destroy the bond for good if you want.”
He’s trying to taunt me, to motivate me. I don’t know what the others think is happening as we talk to each other in our minds. But none of them speaks.
I still don’t know how to do it when he seems to be everywhere, with so many threads to break or push out.
