Page 50 of It Happened Back Then
CHAPTER 22 - BLOSSOM
After seeing Savannah in the store and hearing her hurtful words, my mind spun with thoughts, and I was in and out of sleep all night long. Which made today a bad day. It’s not a special date or anything, but memories flood my mind, and I can’t make them stop.
I dreamed of my dad. He was in the yard with the four of us, throwing the football to Lief while my sisters and I played on the swing set. My mom was sitting under the tree in the shade with an iced tea. I could feel the safety and happiness of the six of us together so strongly that when I was jolted from my sleep and realized it was a dream, tears poured from my eyes.
He died right after my eleventh birthday. He had back pain for a while. My mom finally made him see a chiropractor. That chiropractor felt a lump and told him to go get a scan. That lump was a cancerous mass, and one minute he was there, and the next he wasn’t. It was so quick, and I was so young.
Mom and dad didn’t tell us much,which made it worse. I didn't know how to process that he was gone. And then everything changed.
The house was too big, the rooms too quiet. Mom acted like everything was normal but it was anything but. Meadow would disappear for days on end. January graduated high school and took off for New York City. Then my brother followed her. The house became a ghost town.
And me?
I was a kid who suddenly had to take care of myself. I had to understand this new life I was thrown into. I may have been young, but grief didn’t care. It weighed on me daily but forced me to live at the same time.
I laid there, willing myself to relax when more memories came sharp and fast. I remember this same scenario. I was paralyzed with grief, crying in bed. Bennett came crawling through my window and into my bed, wrapping himself around me. He was always there, no matter what time or what was happening around us.
And the more I think of Bennett, the more the happy memories crash through again. I remember Bennett and I down at Bean Lake, laughing and teasing and having fun in the water. I remember staying out until the sun went down. I remember the way his face glowed under the moonlight while he was inside me.
I remember the baby we made together.
I remember the baby I lost alone.
I kept the pain to myself, like I owed it to him to protect his future, even if it meant breaking both our hearts.
We’reonly weeks out of graduation. The caps are still hanging on our bedroom walls like trophies, tassels swaying from the rearview mirror in our cars. It’s supposed to be the best summer of our lives. Homecoming already feels like a distant memory. Prom waseverything I wanted it to be. And graduation? We’d made it through, side by side, like we always said we would.
The plan is simple: I’m supposed to leave with Bennett. He’s headed to college in Seattle, and I’m meant to follow him in a few weeks. We found a little apartment near campus. And we still had our pact. At twenty-seven, we’d get married. Not too young, but not too far away either. There was enough time to work, save money, build a life together. We’d pay for our wedding ourselves. Buy a house. Talk about kids eventually. But not right away. We wanted time to be us first.
But now everything feels off.
I keep waking up nauseous. Waves of sickness sneak up on me during the most random moments, when I’m brushing my teeth, opening the fridge, just hearing about certain foods. Bennett tells me I’m just stressed, that maybe I’m nervous about leaving home. I don’t think so though. I’ve been in this town since kindergarten. Nothing here scares me. Especially not with him by my side.
My body feels strange. My clothes don’t fit right. I’ve always been curvy, but they feel tighter now. Some mornings I wake up sweating, and I’m always tired. Deep down, something whispers that this isn’t just nerves. Something’s different.
Then it happens.
I stop by Bennett’s house after school. He’s gone to the Swoops Nest, where he’s been working in the kitchen all summer, to pick up his last paycheck. I crash on his couch while waiting for him, trying to sleep off the nausea, but it gets worse. A sour taste floods my mouth. I bolt to the bathroom, barely making it in time. My stomach twists and heaves until I’m shaking, gripping the toilet seat like it might steady me.
When I finally open the bathroom door, his dad is there, blocking my way out.
“What's wrong with you, Blossom?”
His voice is sharp, accusatory, like I’ve done something wrong. I shake my head, “I don’t know. I must’ve eaten something bad.”
He doesn’t move. Just stares at me with a look like I’m no good.
“I know what’s been going on with you and my son,” he says, his tone only getting colder. “If you think you're going to trap him with a baby, you’re wrong. He’s going to college. And I’m getting him as far away from here, and you, as I can.”
My whole body goes cold. “I’m…baby…what? I don’t understand.”
“Oh, you understand.” He steps closer. “My son deserves more than this tired town and the same sad people clinging to it. You will not be the reason he throws away his future.”
The air between us is suffocating. His face is flushed, twisted with fury, and his breath is hot and gross. It makes my stomach churn all over again.
I slam the door in his face, fall to my knees over the toilet, and heave until nothing’s left but the echo of his words.
Baby.
