Page 125 of Bazooka
I shrugged. “Well, if he doesn’t, then he’s just dumb.”
I shifted in my seat and looked around the crowded café, feeling guilty that I’d disobeyed Bazooka’s orders. Still, it was just a short coffee break with my friends, and honestly, what could happen to me here? Especially with Vincent, my loyal bodyguard, watching me from the car outside? I was safer than European royalty.
Alain frowned. “Wait, when you say engaged, does that mean that you two finally… You know?”
I gave him a puzzled look… on purpose. “What do you mean?”
Wagner laughed. “He’s messing with you, Al.”
Dakotah gasped. “No way. You two really…”
I smiled proudly. “Like animals.”
Alain choked on his water. “Jesus. Too much info, Luz.”
“So, he’s staying in Smitsville?” Wagner asked me, practical as always.
It dampened my mood because I tried not to think about that. Bazooka, leaving Smitsville. Bazooka, returning to New Mesa. Bazooka, leavingme. Nope. I decided to remain optimistic.
Then I got a text.
Bazooka (my fiancé):Everything okay, pest?
My heart melted into a puddle of romantic goo, just like that.
I raised my phone and showed the text to my friends.
“Now, if that’s not a declaration of love, I don’t know what is.”
Alain sneezed.
Dotty caressed my hand with a look of pity on his face.
Wagner laughed and stood up. “I have things to do and companies to destroy. Does anyone want to share an Uber?”
“Not me,” I snorted. “I have a bodyguard who’s driving me around. I don’t need to pay for my ride like you, losers.”
All three of them flipped me off, while I grinned and texted Bazooka.
Me:I miss you like crazy, Baz. What do you want for lunch?
Bazooka (my fiancé): I miss you, too. Your ass on the platter.
Me: You want my hole already spread wide, or do you wanna do it by yourself?
Bazooka (my fiancé):Your choice, but Iwillrail you.
I was still grinning when I opened the car door. I scrambled into the passenger seat, only to realize that Vincent had fallen asleep.
“Sleeping on the job, oh, bodyguard, mine?” I said, chuckling. “Baz would kill you if he knew, but I’m not a snitch, so…”
A movement in the back seat caught my attention, but at that point, it was too late. A hand clamped over my mouth, followed by a strange smell in my nostrils, and then the world around me disappeared.
After that, I had a weird dream where Chief Bibb was making me do push-ups. Patricia watched me do it, laughing like a crazy person. Jordan was cheering me on, while asshole Adam kept taking bets. Maddox and Bazooka were nowhere to be seen, but the Triple Threat was there. They were eating popcorn and staring at me, while John Smith was placing a “crime scene” tape around the place.
I didn’t know how long this monstrosity of a dream lasted, but when I came to, my mouth felt numb. The rest of my body felt even worse because I had difficulty moving. I was lying on the ground… stone floor, maybe? Immediately, I realized two things. First, I fucked up. Second, Baz was going to kill me.
“Good morning, sleepyhead,” someone said, making me look up. I blinked to clear my vision, only to realize that I was in some kind of dusty… chapel?
