Page 51 of Love Me Back
“You don’t know him.”
“Jessie.”
“Just forget it, Ellie. This is my life. This was the life I chose to be free.” My head hit the table in despair. I was being dramatic. I knew that. But Ellie was the only person I let see my dramatic side. She got it all. My despair, my anger, my tears, my joy. She was my safe place. The one person I could be myself with and know I wouldn’t be judged.
“Morning, Ellie. Oh, hi, Jessie.”
“Avery, I’m so glad you’re here. Jessie and I are going to go downstairs to the shop.”
“No problem. Just point me to that baby!”
I chuckled at Avery’s enthusiasm. She’d had a huge crush on Ryder when she worked as Chrissy and Tabby’s nanny and thought that she would lose the kids when Ryder married Ellie. Ellie, being who she was, assured her they would still need her for Sebastian and any other children they had.
Rumor had it, Shotgun had taken a liking to Avery, but Ryder was blocking that connection every opportunity he got. I respected him for looking out for Avery. Not every attraction was meant to be.
“Let’s go.” Ellie grabbed my bag and walked through the house to the door that led downstairs directly into the bookstore. I followed behind her, and when we made it to the front of the store, I understood why she had brought my bag.
“What are you doing here?”
“The question is, what the hell are you doing here?” Grayson rolled toward me, and I stood my ground, hands on my hips as I glared at the man who was too handsome for his own good.
“Hi, Jessie.” Addie waved from behind her brother. All I could do was smile briefly before returning my gaze to Grayson.
“I want you to come home.”
“Grayson—”
“Ryder, could we use your office?”
“Sure,” he answered with a grin. I narrowed my eyes at my best friend’s husband and mouthed the wordtraitor.He shrugged as if he didn’t care. I knew he did though.
I pivoted and marched back the way I had just come. I thought about going further, back up the stairs and through Ellie’s apartment, but Ellie called out behind us, “Avery has the door locked.”
My shoulders slumped, and I scowled at my best friend. Grayson followed me into Ryder’s office, and I closed the door.
“Why?”
I closed my eyes. This wasn’t a conversation I wanted to have,especially with him.
“I can’t stay.”
“Fuck that. What we had last night wasn’t a one and done. Jesus Christ, Jessie, I’ve been chasing you for months.”
“And you also told me to leave when I stood at the end of your hospital bed.” Grayson gazed at me, his eyes sad. I held my emotions as best I could, but I was on the verge of losing it if he didn’t stop.
“I didn’t tell you that because I didn’t want you.”
I scoffed and moved to the sofa. My eyes roamed the room, looking everywhere but at him.
“Jessie, I was ashamed of what the doctor had told me. That I might never walk again. I didn’t want you to be tied to a cripple for the rest of your life. I thought letting you go was me being noble, but now I know it was me being scared.”
“I guess I know what you think of me.”
“Don’t fucking do that.” He placed his hands on my knees and scooted as close as he could. “You’ve been running since the day I met you. You never gave me anything, Jessie. If you didn’t want me when I was whole, why would I think you would suddenly change your mind when I couldn’t walk?”
“If you thought I didn’t want you, then why keep pursuing me?”
“I thought I could change your mind. I’ve spent my life with skittish horses, so I know all they need is a little love and acceptance. That’s what I wanted to give you.”
