Page 177 of Collide
“Are you giving him a reason to look at you that way?”
I hesitate. “No.”
“Who’s lying now?”
“This is all new to me, Alex. You know that.”
He scoffs—low and hard. “I don’t know how long that excuse is going to work for you.”
I stare at him, my breath shallow. “This isn’t just about Madison.”
“Then what is it about?”
“I don’t know.” I sigh, exasperated.
The silence between us stretches tight. A breath away from breaking. His chest rises and falls in quick, shallow pulls. His jawworks like he’s biting down on something cruel. “For what it’s worth, I’m not lying about this.”
“But you did lie to me before,” I say. The words cut, sharp and brittle. “Maybe I forgave you, but that doesn’t mean I forgot how it felt.” He flinches like I’ve slapped him.
His hands clench at his sides, then fall loose again. He exhales through his nose—controlled. Barely. “And what am I supposed to do with that?”
I press my palm flat against my chest like I can hold myself together. “I don’t know. But I don’t want to be another woman youjust fuck.”
That lands. His eyes narrow, then he looks away, jaw tight. A vein in his neck twitches.
Before either of us can say another word, Natalie knocks on the library door to ask about something trivial. The moment is severed clean. But the weight of it lingers.
Alex drags a hand through his hair, muttering under his breath before walking off. And the conversation stays unfinished.
But not forgotten.
Laughter and music float up from the party below, but they barely register. I’m too caught up in my own head, pacing the edge of the porch like I can outwalk the thoughts thrashing about.
The fight with Alex still clings to me—his sharp words, the frustration burning in his eyes, the way he looked at me like I’m slipping through his fingers and he doesn’t know how to stop it.
I brace my hands on the railing, sucking in a breath of cool night air, trying to calm the storm clawing through me.
“Okay, what the hell is going on?” Riley’s voice cuts through my spiraling. I turn to find her leaning in the doorway, arms crossed, one brow arched like she’s already sifted through every thought in my head.
She steps closer, eyes scanning me carefully. “You’ve been MIA for an hour, and you look like you’re about to throw yourself into the ocean fully clothed. Spill.”
I let out a shaky breath, dragging a hand through my hair. “I had a fight with Alex.”
Her eyes sharpen, the teasing edge slipping for a moment. “About what?”
“Madison,” I mutter, eyes fixed on the dark waves crashing against the shore. “The conversation earlier with her. And when I asked him about it, he got…defensive. Irritated.”
Riley stays quiet for a beat, her gaze softening. “Did he explain?”
I nod. “Yeah. Said it was nothing. Casual. Over before I even showed up. But…I don’t know, babe. It’s not just about her. It’s everything. Me not knowing where I stand with him. Feeling like I’m always waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
Riley leans her elbows on the railing beside me, bumping her shoulder into mine. “Okay, but let me ask you something.”
I glance at her, wary. “What?”
She tilts her head, studying me. “Have you ever felt this way about anyone before?”
The weight sits heavy in my throat. “You know I haven’t.”
