Page 160 of The King is Dead
“She’s just spent two days traveling alone through the Shadows. Is there any chance you’re underestimating her?”
The words slipped between my ribs and stabbed me right in the heart. I took a step back out of Melek’s arms, gaping at him, breathless with the pain of it, and not entirely surewhythat thought was hurting me so much.
“Yilan,” he sighed.
“You’re suggesting that I don’t know her? You think I would keep her from anything that was good for her? You really think—”
“I think I just watched men who’ve known you since you were a child underestimateyoubecause of their assumptions and prejudices—well intended, and motivated by love and admiration.”
My mouth closed with a snap because I knew exactly what he meant. And I hated that he could draw that line to me.
“I’m not… I would never…”
“I’m not suggesting you throw her in bed with him, Yilan. I’m saying while we’re traveling, speak with her. I’ll speak with him. Let’s just… make sure they’re prepared so that whenever things move, they can be safe.”
I stared up at him, desperately wanting to throw a childish tantrum of my own. I wanted to scream and accuse and ignore him and…
Melek stepped forward, closing the space between us, his eyes filled with compassion, which somehow just made me angrier. “They’re mates, Love. That’s beautiful.”
“Children,” I whispered. “They’re children.”
Melek shook his head. “I don’t think so. I don’t think God would do that to them if they were.”
And how did I argue with that?
How thehelldid I argue with that?
Saddles creaked and the horses' hoofbeats landed like drums on the hollow earth of the Shadows of Shade. We were deep in the forest, winding through a pass between mountains. The entire party had gone quiet.
I looked over my shoulder, wishing Harris were here. Once it was determined that Istral was staying, we’d had to send the caregiver back—she had to tell Turo and the others where Istral was, or they’d think Gall had stolen her and this could all come crashing down around our ears. But that meant Izzy’sonlywatcher other than me was Gall himself. I wasn’t sure if I was grateful for that or not.
Melek had already drawn Gall aside. They couldn’t go too far—we had to stay close to keep them protected from the Shadows. But they were far enough back, winding between trees, that their words weren’t discernable through the fog. Istral kept looking back over her shoulder worriedly, like she thought Melek might steal Gall away from her.
I looked back too and Melek caught my eye, nodding slowly, then turned back to Gall.
I swallowed hard, then blew out a breath. “Izzy… why don’t we ride over here a little bit,” I said quietly. “There are some things I think we should talk about.”
For some minutes we just rode, our horses slowly inching further from the others. The other Nephilim were safe with Diadre among them, and the Shadows would protect Istral and me. But still, it felt… uneasy to only see glimpses of their cloaks or their horses legs through the trees.
I looked at my sister and found her twisted around in her saddle, looking back with that pucker between her brows again. She wasyearning.
I remembered that dreadfulpullin my chest when I’d been separated from Melek—even though it was just by a few wings of a Palace. I recognized that magnetism I felt, even now. I never wanted to be out of Melek’s sight. I could do it, but I hated every second. And the further apart we were physically, the more desperate I became for him.
Was that how my sister felt?
“Izzy,” I murmured.
“Yes?” she asked politely, because that was always her default when she was unsure.
“Have you and Gall… is there a feeling of… needing to be close? Physically?”
“Yes,” she said, apparently unconcerned about it. “It’s why I came. Because we were both afraid of being alone.”
I nodded. “I understand that. I am more wondering… have you two… have you kissed? Or touched each other? Do your bodies feel… restless?”
Istral’s cheeks flushed pink and a part of me wanted to shout and point and saysee? She’s not like that!
But then my sister dropped her head and looked at me from the side like she was afraid how I would react. “Sometimes he comes into my bed to lay with me. And sometimes… sometimes my nightclothes slip up and…”
