Page 41 of Last Witch Attempt
Landon looked up and smiled. He saw the happiness blast through me, then the annoyance take over. By the time I sat in the open chair next to him I had managed to hide my disappointment.
“Hey.” I didn’t kiss him. This lunch was more official. “How are you?” I smiled at everybody in turn, then grabbed a menu. I didn’t need to look at it—I’d been eating here since I was a child—but I needed something to do with my hands.
“How are things with you?” Landon asked, his hand moving to my back. “Have you been out in the woods?”
I didn’t appreciate the question. “I was at the office. This week’s edition is basically done as soon as three people okay their ads.”
Landon was taken aback. “I didn’t realize you were actually going to work.”
“I figured it was better to get it done now than wait and have to try to clear everything once we have information to work with.”
He eyed me for several seconds. “I really did think you were going to take off into the woods with Aunt Tillie or something.”
“I haven’t seen Aunt Tillie since breakfast.” The words were barely out of my mouth when a buzzing outside the diner drew my attention to the huge wall of windows.
Aunt Tillie buzzed past the window in a dark purple cape and a camouflage combat helmet on her four-wheeler. “Huh.”
“Dammit,” Chief Terry complained. “I told her that thing is not allowed downtown.”
Steve’s attention was drawn out the window, his forehead a mass of wrinkles. “Was that your aunt?”
“I don’t know,” I replied. “If I don’t claim her does that mean I don’t have to deal with her?”
Steve smirked. “I like the helmet.”
“I like the cape,” Spencer said. “It takes guts for someone to drive down the sidewalk on a four-wheeler while wearing a cape.”
“She’s not brave,” I replied. “She’s sending a message.”
Steve’s face was blank. “What message?”
“That she’s not sorry for terrorizing Clove and she’s going to do what she wants.” I leaned back in my chair. “She’s going to be an absolute menace going forward.”
“How bad can she be?” Steve argued. “She’s an old lady.”
“Shh!” Chief Terry looked around, terrified.
“Don’t ever say that to her face if you don’t want to smell like rancid pickles for a week,” Landon supplied. “Or rotten sushi.”
Steve’s eyes went wide. “I don’t follow.”
“Listen, all those stories you’ve heard about Aunt Tillie? They’re basically true.” Landon looked pained as he laid it out for his boss. “Like, the story where she climbed the ladder into that big silo on the highway and called a bunch of birds to send after the kids vandalizing the fields? She did that.”
“And in leggings with fire-breathing dragons strategically placed over the crotch, no less,” Chief Terry said dully.
“She was supposed to throw those leggings away,” I countered. “She was wearing those that day?”
“I’m not playing that game.” Chief Terry shook his head. “If your mother wants to police what Tillie wears, that’s on her. I’ve told her that. Now I’m telling you.”
Rather than acquiesce to his demands, I snorted. “There’s no way you told my mother that. You would be the one wearing the leggings if you had.”
“Ibasicallysaid that to her,” he corrected.
I rolled my eyes until they landed on Steve. “Do you want the hard truth? Aunt Tillie is crazy. She’s not crazy like you imagine, she’s crazy like a fox. She’s out there … but she’s smart. Actually, smart isn’t the right word.” I shook my head. “She’s diabolical.”
“You make her sound like the Devil,” Steve replied.
“Oh, no, the devil is afraid of her. In fact…” Aunt Tillie appeared again. This time she was coming from the opposite direction. She was on her scooter, wearing a black helmet and a red cape, and she looked to be screaming something as she passed, her gaze pointed toward Hypnotic.
