Page 4 of Last Witch Attempt
“Grandmother?” Aunt Tillie sputtered. “I’m middle aged. What is he implying?”
“She’s our great-aunt and she’s nuts,” Thistle replied. “She brought us out here to hunt morels in the middle of the night because she’s nuttier than a squirrel hoarding for winter. If that’s a problem, tell us and we’ll be on our way.”
Gillette cast a sidelong look toward Scoggins. “Maybe we should call your mother? You’re all sisters, right?”
“Cousins,” I answered. “Our mothers know we’re with her. We go out with her all the time.”
“Your mothers willingly let you out with her?” Scoggins arched an eyebrow.
I nodded.
“To hunt morels at night?”
“I told you she’s nutty and lies to go on adventures,” Thistle said. “She’s not doing anything illegal. She’s weird and obnoxious and she will go to jail just to be right because that’s who she is. You’re wasting your time.”
“I’d feel better calling your mothers.” Gillette pulled his phone out of his pocket. “Can I have the number?”
I rattled it off for him. He got my mother on the phone right away, nodded his head a few times, then disconnected.
“Your mother says that your great-aunt is going to be in trouble when she gets home.” Gillette’s lips quirked. “You’re right. She says that your great-aunt is eccentric and you guys will be fine going home with her.”
“So can we go?” I asked. They still hadn’t moved away from the truck.
“Sure.” Gillette stepped back. His gaze was on Aunt Tillie as she swaggered toward her truck. “If you run into trouble, here’s my card.” He handed the rectangular piece of cardboard to me.“Your mother says you’re only five minutes from home, so you should make it back fine.”
“And if we don’t Bigfoot will eat us anyway,” Clove said mournfully. “There’s nothing you can do. You should save yourselves.”
Gillette sent her a small smile, then focused on me. “There’s nothing you need to tell me?”
Why was he focused on me? Why wasn’t he asking Clove? She was the easiest mark. Unless … oh, no. Hedidsee a good girl when he looked at me. He assumed I was going to follow the rules. That wasn’t the Winchester way.
“I’m fine,” I assured him. “Thistle was right about the nut thing. This is hardly the first time she’s taken us on an adventure in the middle of the night.”
Gillette didn’t look happy with that news, but he moved away so we could get into the truck.
“You can go now,” Aunt Tillie said pointedly as she rolled down the window. “You’re in my way.”
“I have one more question,” Gillette said. “Who is this lawyer that you’re going to throw at us if we arrest you?”
Aunt Tillie blinked. “I represent myself.” She floored it the second the words were out of her mouth, gravel churning everywhere.
We made it only a couple hundred feet down the road before the troopers hit their sirens.
“You always have to make it worse,” I complained as Aunt Tillie cursed under her breath and debated if she could outrun them. “Why do you always make it worse?”
“Because that’s my superpower.”
“Yeah, but…”
“Shh.” Aunt Tillie tightened her grip on the steering wheel. “It’s time to outrun ‘The Man.’ Buckle up, because it’s going to be a bumpy ride.”
1
ONE
PRESENT DAY
“This is the dumbest idea we’ve ever had.”
