Page 40 of My Favorite Secret
I don’t have the strength to nod. He takes a seat beside me and gets to work in silence, wetting my hair and gently rubbing shampoo through it. A flashback enters my mind, of the last time Tyler and I spoke. It was nasty. I was harsh on him. He left me, rightfully so. And now he’s here again.
Tears leak down my face. I was wrong—there is still something I care about.
Tyler Blackwood.
“You’re too good to me,” I mumble. “You were right about everything. I’m sorry for the way I acted. I read your letter and loved it. I love you. You’re the most important person in my life. I’d be nothing without you.”
Tyler lifts my left palm to his lips, kissing my scar. “Harp, the fight between us means nothing. Don’t spend another second worrying about it. I love you more than you know. But this conversation can wait. All I’m concerned about is taking care of you.”
I hold his hand tight, weaving our fingers, clinging to the sight of him despite how tired my eyes are. “She left me. Felix left me. Please don’t leave me, Tyler, ever. I need you.”
He kisses my forehead. “I’m not going anywhere. It’s you and me, always.”
My eyes sting with more tears, hearing him say our phrase. “You and me, always,” I repeat. It feels like my only lifeline. “How’s my dad? Where is he?”
“He’s taking care of a few things right now. Nothing for you to worry about. Your dad is upset but he’s coping. He’s been worried about you. We all have. Felix and I haven’t left you alone once.”
I blink with confusion. “Felix has been with me?”
“Yes. He refused to leave your side.”
Tyler’s words make me frown. When he first mentioned Felix, there was a spark of hope within me. But Felix refusing to leave my side? It can’t be true. “You don’t need to lie just to make me feel better.”
“It’s not lies. He cares about you so much.”
The tears fall harder. “Please, stop. I don’t want to talk about him.” Tyler is only trying to help, but the lies make the pain in my heart worse. Where is Felix now? Why would Felix comfort me when he’s spent several years hating me?
Another memory comes to mind. Felix’s lips. His kisses from that fleeting moment when we were parked in his Jeep. His hands upon me.Inme. The way he whispered my name. It was the most incredible moment of my life.
Now, that moment in his car feels distant and surreal. I wish he were here and that he’d been holding me as I slept, as Tyler claims. But the truth is, I’m a conquest for Felix and nothing more. He didn’t care about my mother, and he doesn’t care about me.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
FELIX
After a long and emotionally draining day of funeral arrangements, Thomas and I return through the front door of his apartment at sunset. I want to fall into bed and sleep for an entire day, but Harper is the priority. I also told Thomas I would pick up incoming relatives of his from the airport later tonight, giving him a chance to rest from the day.
“We should check in on Harper,” I say.
“Go ahead,” Thomas tells me. “I need a moment to myself.”
“You okay? You did good today. Clara will have a beautiful service.”
“She will. Thank you.”
He leaves for his office without a word. I don’t know whether to follow him or not. I spoke the truth about him just now—Thomas pulled himself together when meeting with the funeral director. During moments when he was too overwhelmed, I stepped in and helped make decisions for the service.
To my surprise, my father turned up—unsurprisingly with his check book. He insisted on paying for all funeral costs as an ode to my mother’s best friend, and as gratitude for all the time Clara spent caring for me and my brothers over the years.
Deciding to give Thomas his space, I head for Harper’s bedroom.
“Felix?” he calls before I get too far.
“Yes?”
His forehead creases and there’s a look in his eyes like he’s battling over what to say. “Thank you for being with me today. I couldn’t have pulled through without your support.”
“Of course. There’s no need to thank me.”
