Page 12 of Grumpy Pucking Orc
They all jerked their heads to look at me.
“There is a human with orc blood in Baltimore?” Ugwyll’s voice rang with excitement. “Are there more? Females who live here and have orc blood would not have died from the plague. If so, we could all possibly find true mates. But could we bring them home? I don’t want to experience the joy of a mate bond, only to possibly lose my wife to the plague when we returned.”
“We’d need to stay here,” Eng gloomily announced. “I can’t stay here. I’m a very important orc, a son of the clan chieftain. A prince in my kingdom. I’m needed at home. I’m better off just grabbing a fertile human female than having to suffer through the loss of a part-orc mate.”
“I’d stay,” Bwat said. “As much as I dislike life here, I would stay if it meant I was able to bond for life with a female who had orc blood.”
“Is her skin green?” Ugwyll asked. “Green-tinged? Tiny tusks? Those back home with human blood in their veins are only slightly smaller than full-blooded orcs, so she must be larger than most human females.”
I finally managed to break into theconversation. “She does not appear to haveanyorc blood; she’s a human female.”
Silence fell once more.
“You think you felt a mate bond for ahumanfemale?” Bwat asked.
“How hard did you hit your head on the ice?” Eng scoffed.
“Notthathard,” I grumbled. “I’m sure?—”
“Maybe you confused lust for a mate bond.” Ugwyll reached down and adjusted his hand-axe through his pants. “Human females can be very enticing. Their lithe bodies, their tantalizing smell… I wonder about their tuskless mouths, and how that might feel?—”
“It was more than lust,” I snapped. “I’m sure?—”
“Bonded mates are orc-orc.” Bwat frowned. “This human femalemustbe orc. An orc with a glamor to make her appear human? Although with our resistance to magic, I can’t see that ever working.”
“She is a human, and I am sure she is one hundred percent human. And I believe she may be my true mate.” I slugged down my beer and waved at the bartender for another. “Even if she is not, I want her to be my wife. We will return home together, live out our long lives together, and have many orclets.”
I couldn’t hide my smile at the thought. I’d built a den back home before leaving, intending to present it to my wife. It was the traditional wedding gift from a male to his bride, and I’d carefully crafted every bit of the home, thinking the whole time about a contented wife and the rowdy, adorable children we’d raise together. But Jordan… I’d expand the sitting room, add a second porch onto the back, build a detached kitchen for when the days grew too hot to cook in the house. I’d save my earnings and buy the very best furs, purchase anything that caught her eye, make myself available to satisfy her every whim.
Eng’s laughter broke through my happy thoughts.
“Doessheknow about this? Assuming this truly is a mate bond you feel, then who is to say a human female is even able to experience the same? You may forever be pining for a female who is not interested in being your wife, or one who never accepts the bond.”
“True.” Ugwyll nodded. “If she’s your mate, then you should grab her and race home as fast as you can.”
“Don’t give her a choice,” Eng added. “Once you’re home with her, she’ll have to accept you as her husband. She’ll have no other option.”
I glared at him. Eng was such an asshole. The other orc claimed to be a king’s son from a different mountain range’s clan and acted as if he were better than the rest of us. One day Eng would realize he was working the same job, living in the same sort of accommodations, and under the same restrictions as we were. Here, no one gave a river rat’s ass whether Eng was a king’s son or a dung-pile turner.
“It would be dishonorable to break my vow, even though that promise was made to an angel and not another orc,” I told him. “And I cannot abduct her. She is the female I want to make my bride. I could never do anything to cause her distress or harm her in any way. Besides, the human female in question has indicated she is open to my advances. She gave me a piece of paper with her name, title, and the location of her domicile. And she told me to meet her there Monday morning at the hour of eight.”
Bwat sucked in a breath. “In themorning? At the hour ofeight? Whoa.”
I puffed my chest out. Itwasa promisingsituation.
“Good job.” Ugwyll punched me in the shoulder. “Figures you’d find a willing female first. Is she comely?”
I snarled at the other orc, ready to come to blows at the questioning of my true mate’s attractiveness.
Bwat put a hand on my arm. “Easy. We just want you to tell us of her beauty.”
Oh. Well, that was okay, then.
“My mate’s name is Jordan Schooner, and she holds a title of ‘Doctor’ among her people. She is slight in build, but bold of character, with skin the color of foam on a dark beer, and eyes like storm-waters. Her hair is the shade of oak-bark and sunshine, and her voice as soothing as Maxten song at night.”
Bwat nodded approvingly. “Very poetic. Your mate sounds truly gorgeous.”
Eng snorted. “Not to me. ‘Bold of character’? She’s a shrew who will make your life a nightmare of arguments. I want a quiet, submissive woman who will do as I say.”
