Page 48 of Rebound
“It’s a Vegas thing.”
Jules lets out a breath and hooks her arm through mine. “I love you.”
“I love you.”
It’s because she loves me that I don’t tell her all the reasons I like whatever this is with Roman.
I’ve been an athlete my whole life and that comes with a lot of attention and scrutiny. Winning at the Olympics comes with a lot of attention and sponsorship opportunities.
Suddenly the whole world is aware of my name and familiar with my face because they’ve seen it in commercials or on the side of cereal boxes or hosting a podcast or because they’re one of the millions of people who follow me on social media.
It can make you feel bigger than life and it can make you feel like if you fail, you fail everyone who’s ever trusted you to succeed.
I can’t let go of the fact that I always have to be perfect. Being Lavinia Callahan means living in a box and I can only go as far as the box allows. Because at the end of the day, I’m someone’s role model and the reason they love hockey or sports.
I don’t know how to be anyone other than this, and that somehow makes me a person someone can’t spend the rest of their life with.
Except when Roman looks at me, he doesn’t see Lavinia Callahan. He sees…Blossom. Even though I’m not a fan of the nickname, I like what it means to me. I like that when I look at him, I see a me I’m unfamiliar with.
And I want to find her.
SEVENTEEN
ROMAN
I’m getting weird looks from the team. I’m getting murderous looks from Drew. For the first time, it doesn’t have anything to do with my performance on the ice. Even Coach Cross doesn’t say anything about what happened.
He does chew Ford out for missing a pass that almost cost us the game.
There’s no way to explain what happened without having the guys hate me more. I saw Lavinia, she was wearing a jersey, I saw Kai’s name and number on the back, I fucking lost it.
I’ve never been jealous in my life, except when it comes to Lavinia. She has all these people who know her, or want her, or want to know her. For the record, I’m not jealousofher. I don’t want their attention. I’m jealous ofthembecause they have her attention.
And I want that.
It’s not Kai’s fault, or even Lavinia’s. It’s almost entirely my own mental and emotional state of being. When you’re constantly alone with no one to talk to, you get really good at listening to yourself. And I preferred this life I chose, until I played with the Titans, and had Lavinia’s attention.
Shouts ring out around me as Kai enters the VIP room in the club where the Titans are gathered to celebrate tonight’s win. We were losing miserably and the only reason we won is because he stopped each one of the opposition's shots. Even in the dim lighting, it’s hard not to miss the bashful look on his face or the way he ducks away from the entrance to disappear in the sea of Titans.
Suddenly, he’s next to me at the bar with Drew’s arm around his neck.
“We’ll take the bottle of Dom,” Drew says, and side-eyes me. “And one more of whatever Maddox is drinking to drown his sorrows.”
“Fuck off, Callahan,” I mutter.
It’s too bad he has the same copper hair and green eyes as Lavinia because he has none of her personality. Where she draws in a crowd, he repels them.
“I don’t know what you think is going to happen, but leave Lavinia out of it. Stay away from her. She doesn’t need another asshole in her life when she just got rid of the last one.”
I turn in my seat to face him fully. “That’s something you and I agree on. Josh is an asshole.”
“He was your team’s captain.”
I shrug. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, Drew, but I’ve had a lot of teams and a lot of captains. Just because I play for them, doesn’t mean I’m loyal to them.”
He crosses his arms, taking my measure. “You’re not loyal to me, then.”
“Loyalty has to be earned, Callahan. It’s not a participation trophy. You don’t trust me because I’m playing for the Titans, do you?”
