Page 6 of Shielding his Legacy
She was barefoot and dirty, with just the clothes on her back and a few belongings in a worn-out messenger bag. She’d stopped at a drugstore between here and Grand Central, picking out a pair of slippers for herself and a cheap receiving blanket to keep Abby warm before realizing she’d left her purse on the dresser at the safe house. So, she’d pushed back outside without the items, the arctic breeze blowing through her T-shirt and leggings like she was dressed in gauze, the baby screaming.
Mentally, she added penniless to the list of things she had going for her. She couldn’t even get money out of the bank without her wallet and identification, the fragile financial security she’d worked so hard to achieve now gone in an instant. She could get a new driver’s license, but not withoutalerting the authorities to her location, and she’d have to be an idiot to do that.
She rubbed the baby’s legs to warm them, worrying about how cold Abby’s skin felt to the touch. At nearly two months old, she was the center of Eva’s universe. The only thing that mattered was taking care of her daughter. Being a good mother. Making enough money to provide for her child. And she hated that she was showing up on Gavin’s doorstep looking for all intents and purposes like she was doing a terrible job of all three.
Suck it up, Buttercup.
This isn’t about you.
It was about safety and living through the day. She thought of the officers back at the safe house and wondered if they were alive. She shuddered, forcing the thought under the water of her mind. She couldn’t think about them now, couldn’t stand the idea that they may have died protecting her, or at least trying to do so.
No, she had to focus on Gavin. She was certain he’d be angry, though each of them were equally responsible for creating their little girl. He was sure to think it was her fault, and just as sure to resent all the ways in which he imagined his life was about to change.
She practiced what she would say in her head.
I don’t want anything from you, Gavin.
Well, beyond her immediate needs. She would have to ask him for money to get back to Phoenix safely with the baby, the thought of which made her sick to her stomach.
I have friends in Phoenix who can help me get back on my feet.
Okay, not friends exactly. But if there was ever a time for shady acquaintances, then surely this was it. She bit her lip, wondering if any of the juvenile delinquents she’dbefriended in the foster care system were skilled enough in illegal activities to help her get a new identity.
Probably not.
She thought of her mother and was hit with a pang of longing so intense it nearly knocked her down. No. She wouldn’t seek her family out. Once she made it to Phoenix, she could get a job waitressing just like she had a New York and save up her money to get back into photography again.
The idea was daunting. Getting set up in New York was the hardest thing she’d ever done, and the thought of doing it all over again was exhausting. She let her eyes close in the face of her stress. The worst part of those days had been leaving her baby with a sitter, and she could have cried at the idea of repeating that period in her life.
There was no time for tears. There never was. She’d made a choice a long time ago to create the life she wanted for herself, and crying about the lousy hand she’d been dealt was the exact opposite of what she needed to do.
The distant sound of footsteps made her stomach clench. Gavin was about to find out he had a child. She was going to see the man who had walked away from her bed without a second glance in her direction, who haunted her dreams and had stolen her heart just as surely as he’d taken her virginity.
God, how she wanted to run! To get into the elevator and go far away from this man, this conversation, this revelation. She wanted none of it. There’d been a time when she’d tried to find him to tell him about the pregnancy, but she’d long since accepted the truth. He didn’t want her in his life, and he certainly wouldn’t want their child.
The footsteps were closer now, and she looked back over her shoulder to the hallway behind her. There was Gavin DeGrey, just as she remembered, his piercing stare alivewith recognition, and something deep inside her belly hummed despite a paralyzing fear so intense she could barely breathe.
How many times had she imagined this reunion? Fateful dreams and waking fantasies that held the full range of emotion and possible responses from him. There was her favorite, the one where he was happy, filled with joy at finding her again and the existence of the sweet Abby. There was the sexy one, where the baby was taken in the arms of some governess stage left so Gavin could make love to Eva as soon as possible.
But this was reality, and an electric current tied them to each other the moment she turned her head, an invisible fire flaming to life between them, heating her face and chest.
She hadn’t imagined their connection, hadn’t embellished one single thing. In that moment, it was like they were back in that hotel room, a sheltered corner of the world where their existence seemed to meld into one.
God, he was handsome. Strong and tall with tanned skin and golden-brown hair that curled at his nape, and her fingers itched to touch him. But it was his eyes, those bright green eyes she saw every time she looked at their child, that made her insides dance.
The eyes that had stared into hers as he entered her for the first time, breaking the barrier no man had touched. The eyes that made her feel vulnerable, completely exposed and beautiful while they made love. While they showered together. Even when they said goodbye.
“Eva.” His voice was gravelly and pulled at her like a marionette’s strings. Her body recognized the sound and responded to it viscerally, an answering vibration resonating deep inside her.
Abby stirred in her arms, rubbing her face into Eva’sshirt, reminding her she was there. But Gavin couldn’t see. Eva’s torso was twisted away from him, the baby hidden from his view.
She hesitated, fearing the chasm that would divide them when Abby was revealed, wanting to revel in the warmth of his attention as long as possible, precious sunshine breaking through the clouds that had covered her life for so very long.
He was closer now, those eyes lighting up her body as they followed her curves to her feet and back up again. Was it true? Was he happy to see her after all? She’d taken his departure so hard, certain he didn’t want her in his life anymore, but now she was just as sure of the opposite.
Turn around.
Show him the baby and watch his face fall.
