Page 45 of A Scandalous Love for the Enticing Duke
There was that smile again on Benjamin’s face. A secret smile, as though remembering a fond memory. Witches indeed. The red-headed one had eventually succeeded in casting his brother under a wicked spell. They were doomed, the lot of them! What laughable tale it would make when they retold it to their children.
“If you heard it, then it is probably true. Of late, I came to the realisation that perhaps it is high time I too found myself a wife and settled down. What better choice than the woman who makes my blood boil and my balls itch? You know how easily I become bored, Nicholas. I have no doubt that that would never happen with Isabelle. Never a dull moment, not with the way she makes me want to spank her this moment and ravish her the next.”
Nicholas chuckled. Although, Eleanor did not elicit such hot-blooded emotions from him, he could understand. The Birmingham sisters with their beauty and wit could prove to be too much for any man to handle. Yet that was where the thrill lay; the constant challenge, knowing that one would not have a wife who wagged their tongues and tail at their every command. “I am not quite certain that those two mean different things for you, Benjamin.”
“Oh, but they do. One would be in punishment of course, although it could also be pleasurable. But the other, ahh … solely for pleasure, dear friend. Now, tell me, what ails your spirit? You look like you have been living in hell.”
“Perceptive as always, I see. I could never hope to get anything past you.”
“Certainly not. Not as long as you wear your heart on your sleeve. You have never been one to hide your emotions, Nicholas. You never cared to learn and not that this is a bad thing but if you are going to rule a dukedom someday, then I would suggest you learn a little bit of the art.”
Nicholas pondered on that for a short while. Benjamin was right. He had to learn how to hide his emotions, but that was a discussion for another time. There was a more pressing matter at hand. “I suppose you are right and soon, I shall come for your tutelage. Ack, Benjamin! I do not know how to tell you this thing. Yet, I cannot keep this weight in my heart, any longer. It wearies me so.”
He sat up at the same time Benjamin rested against his table and crossed his legs at his ankle. “Surely, you are aware that there is nothing you cannot tell me, dear friend.”
The concern in his friend’s voice was all the assurance Nicholas needed to know that he had been right to come to him. He took another deep breath as he considered how best it would be to break this news. After a short while, he concluded that the best way would be just to say it as it was. So, he did.
“I am supposed to be married to the Lady Agnes, as you know. Regardless, I am afraid that my heart belongs to another. This fair lady is none other than the youngest sister of my fiancée, the lady Eleanor. I wonder if your memory serves you right; if it does, then you would recall that you had seen us both in Fortham library that night of the ball, when you came to fetch me. Truly, that was my first encounter with the Lady; howbeit, I was instantly enchanted. Ever since, all efforts to get my heart and head out of this complication have come to naught. I have only ended up falling deeply and irresponsibly head over heels in love with her. A mess, I agree, but it is what it is. For so long now, I have kept this to myself. I cannot anymore.”
He looked up then and was surprised by the expressionless face he found. He had expected a reaction from Benjamin. Shock, amusement, yet he was getting nothing. It caused him to wonder if Benjamin had heard him at all, and if he had, what thoughts were going through his mind.
“I suppose you should also be aware of the fact that these feelings are mutual. Eleanor has a softness for me in return, but she pleaded that I stay away. She loves her sister, and her guilt would not allow her engage in any sort of illicit affair with me.”
He finally got a reaction from Benjamin as he ended. The young Duke’s eyes widened, then as they returned to their usual width, a smirk formed. Shock and amusement, Nicholas was glad. He released a breath he hadn’t known he was holding. He was so relieved that he didn’t even flinch when his friend finally responded.
“A quite amusing situation, would you not say so? I am glad that at least one of you seem to be sensible. She was right to request that you never see her again. What were you thinking, wanting to engage in an affair like that, asking her to sell her soul and betray her sister’s trust?”
“Come off it, Benjamin. You of all people should know it isn’t like that. When you truly care for someone, there is little control one has over the actions that are spun from those feelings. It is merely the same way for I.” It had been almost a grumble, and he hated that he sounded that way; nevertheless, there was no helping it.
Benjamin simply huffed as he walked towards him and planted himself on a sofa opposite from him.
“Why are you only just coming forth with this, now? When the wedding is barely two weeks away and all is almost ready. A lot has gone into what is to be the grandest wedding of the season, and now is the time you think to come forward?”
“Of course not. About a month ago, before I even made an official proposal, I had decided that there was no way I could continue with this marriage while my heart hungers for another. It would not only be unfair to Eleanor and I, it would be also, to Agnes. I would never be able to give her my heart and my all, as she would deserve as my wife. So, I went to the townhouse, eager to tell Mother and Father the truth and request that they allow me marry Eleanor, instead. Unfortunately, that was the day I learned of Father’s illness. He had looked so frail and fragile in his bed and his voice had sounded so broken as he told me that his last wish was that he saw me married to Agnes before his demise.” He paused to swallow as he remembered all the emotions he had encountered that dreadful morning.
“I was devastated at my discovery, but beyond that, I could not bear to break Father’s heart with the truth at that moment. Sadly, I did not feel as strongly as I feel for Eleanor at that moment, so I reckoned this would be an easy feat to achieve, and that with time, I would gain control of my emotions. It was that day I decided to make an official proposal. Now, I see how wrong I was, and like you said, it is almost too late now.”
“It is too late, Nicholas. Perhaps, you have a plan? What is it you intend to do?”
“It’s still the same families. Nothing has to change, except the bride, of course. I have given this a lot of thought, and I think it would be best if I just came forward with the truth now. I would tell Mother and Father and beg for their support. With it, we can break the news to the Birminghams and offer our sincerest apologies.”
Benjamin was already shaking his head in disapproval before Nicholas finished his speech, and his heart fell. If Benjamin would not support this, then how could it hope to go forward with these plans? His hope completely shattered when Benjamin spoke.
“You cannot do that, Nicholas. Think of all the people you would hurt with this. What would society say? The scandal it would cause when word gets out that the eldest sister was replaced by the younger! You know my stand regarding this love madness. It is fickle, unreal, and if you could just manage to put your emotions under control, then mayhap, you would think with a clear head.” He paused to sigh and shook his head as if he could not believe that Nicholas would have considered this under any circumstance. It saddened Nicholas for he had hoped his best friend would see reason and be on his side. If Benjamin would not support him, then who would? Benjamin carried on, unaware of the thoughts running through his head, and as he spoke further, Nicholas felt as though a spike went through his heart each time.
“Henry would be disappointed as would Elizabeth. Agnes … I cannot even begin to imagine how this would affect her. She would be devastated, and lastly, Eleanor would be scorned by her dearest sister whom she loves, by her entire family, and of course, by the ton. There would be so much to pay, and in the end, you two may end up even more miserable than you are now. Are you certain you are willing to sacrifice all of this?”
Truer words had never been spoken, and Nicholas was aware of this. Benjamin’s words gave him a lot to think about, and if indeed, things turned out that way, there was no doubt about the fact that he would rather not risk it all. Truly, there was so much at stake. Mayhap, Benjamin was right, and love was indeed fickle. Mayhap, if he gave himself a chance with Agnes, he would come to care for her, even greater than he cared for Eleanor. This could be fleeting, and he was convinced there would be no sense in losing all that Benjamin had stated, for something that may not hold true in the nearest future. So, even as his heart ached, and he knew he would remain in hell for a while longer, even as he wished still, with all his heart that he could turn back the hands of time and choose Eleanor, he heard himself say, “I suppose you are right, dear friend. I must confess, I never considered all of this. I am certainly glad I came to seek your counsel.”
Benjamin gave a curt nod in acknowledgement and raised his glass in a toast. Nicholas did the same, and in one gulp, welcomed the sweet bitterness of whisky. Perhaps, it was not too early to get drunk, after all.
Chapter 30
Eleanor listened for her sister’s voice as she stayed still, outside the doors of her chamber. Agnes who had been ill for about three days was finally recovering, and the physician had declared that she could now receive visitors. As the news came, she had promptly gotten on her feet and found her way to the kitchen to brew tea and make cookies for her. They were Agnes’s favourite, and Eleanor reckoned she would appreciate them.
Her response came, but it was feeble and weak, and it caused a knot to form in Eleanor’s chest. Disregarding it, she gestured at the door so that Rachel may open it for her, as her hands were occupied with the tray which contained the tea kettle, cups, and a bowl of cookies. As the door came open, she stepped into her sister’s chamber. The first thing she noticed was that it looked strange, like it had not seen the light of day in so long. The curtains were down, casting a gloom shadow upon the large space. She could hardly make out her sister’s frame on her bed. Knowing what must be done first, she dropped the tray on a small wooden table and walked over to the windows.
“You would not mind the lighting, would you? I reckon it would do a lot of good to have some light in here, seeing as you are feeling better now.” She paused as she waited again, for permission.
