Page 53 of Mark Us Little Bear
I hope so.
I hope I’m everything like my dad.
Laughter filters in from outside followed by whistles, shouts, and curses. This house is full of life and everyone in it makes me wish I grew up in a place like this—two blocks away—but entirely different.
“The boys did most of the tasks on the list so I only have a couple more things to do.” She notes.
“Got it.” I briefly glimpse at the list again. “Bradley is the oldest, right?”
“Yes. Also, he’s not a troublemaker, believe it or not.” Her soft silver gaze encounters mine as I glance up at her. “Shocking I know.”
“He’s got all the qualifications to be one.”
“I know, right?! With thatmouth.“ She pronounces the last word sharply. “He can get into trouble and out of it easily.” Her fingers snap together.
He does.That’s what makes him special.
“He took it upon himself to be there for them when their dad passed. He promised Drew that no matter what they would always laugh and be this goofy.” A tear glides down her cheek as she chops onions and puts them in the salad bowl. “He left me with our biggest treasure.”
I snatch a napkin from the holder and bring it to her, trying to hide my glossy eyes in the process of it all.
Their relationship with their mom is far better than mine. I was always closer to Dad. These strong emotions they have toward their parents are how I feel about him.
Why can’t it be enough for me?
I don’t want Mom to hang like a dark cloud over everything I do.
The thing is she is still alive and I wish she made an effort to keep me as an active part of her life but after everything she said and did maybe it’s finally time to let her go.
For good.
We will never be friends and I will never beam at her the way I do when it comes to Dad. I always end up resenting her more.
“Thank you, sweetie, it’s an emotional day.” She dabs the napkin on her cheek, “I’m also happy he is home with you and Ronnie. We’ve been waiting to meet his special roommates.”
Special roommates?
Bradley
Today marks five years since my dad passed away and we’re celebrating him as we did every year since. Only this year it’s with myspecial roommates—I fucked up and blurted it out to Mom like that on one of our chats this week.
Jogging down the stairs, I move past her and Amber with a smile while they chat and finish Mom’s to-do list. I’m responsible for the barbecue later so no snacking today, I’ll be feeding my “special roommates”food until they explode.
I still want to gag a little over that ridiculous name.I bet if Piper heard it, she would’ve gagged herself but she’s too young to let in on it.
“After Drew had the fishing accident. He decided to stir clear of the ocean which is ridiculous considering we’re surrounded by it.”
I still remember it like it was yesterday. Dad went fishing with some friends and he came back with a fishhook caught in his palm, it tore his skin apart but it wasn’t a big deal, though he still refused to go to the hospital without Mom. She was pissed but drove him there quickly and then took him to eat ice cream.
He wanted to do everything with her, and being away from her always irked him. Plus, he was a giant baby when it came to hospitals.
“Pass the ball, c’mon!” Cole’s crisp voice snaps me out of the memory as he shouts outside.
I stroll to the backyard, finding Ronnie in the middle of an aggressive football game already getting along with my loud brothers.
Sultans of Swing by Dire Straits plays loudly from a speaker in the background. It was my Dad’s favorite band—I often listen to the song on my phone.
“Eat my flip-flop, Ryan.” Cole tackles him to the ground.
