Page 73 of The Story of Us
“You didn’t know what?”
“I didn’t know he loved me, he never said, he never told me.”
“No, because apparently you have a history of doing a runner when blokes tell ya that shit so he was waiting. He knew you was coming round to the idea, he had it all planned, he was taking you away, for two weeks in June, after your brother’s wedding. He was gonna take you away and show you, make you realise that you did love him.” He stops talking as Cam mumbles in his sleep. “Are you staying or not sweetheart, that’s all I wanna know?” He was taking me away, he knew I was falling in love with him, he knew, I didn’t, did I?
“I can stay for a couple of hours.” He didn’t acknowledge my reply so I went and sat on the bed next to Cam. “Right Ben, I’ll arrange a cleaner to come through, but for now, can you just check all the cupboards and drawers in here and in the bathroom, anywhere he might stash gear or booze. I’ll get someone over to put some locks on the door and we’ll work out shifts between me, Josh and Tory to watch him. He hated rehab, we haven’t left it so long this time so what I’m thinking is we get a doctor over here to check him out and if it’s okay, we do his detox and rehab from here.”
Benny nods in agreement. “Good, that’s good Rob, you‘re right, he hated rehab, it’ll kill him if he goes back there.”
“I don’t understand this, is Cam an alcoholic or a junky or both?” Robbie’s whole demeanour changes as he comes and sits down on the bed and looks down at Cam.
“Not really, I don’t know, I’m not a professional, Cam usually stays away from drugs, but he does do the odd line of Charlie and he likes a drink as much as the next bloke but he always knows when to say enough’s enough, apart from when he’s not coping. When he’s not coping he uses them to escape, he loses himself in a bottle and when that’s not enough he makes himself feel like he can deal with anything by snorting line after line of coke and that’s what he’s doing now.” His gaze turns to me and he looks me over, like he’s seeing me for the first time.
“I’m sorry alright, about what I said, he told me you had never said that you loved him, he told me you had admitted from the start that you were in love with someone else. He just didn’t expect you to get back with the other bloke.”
“Neither did I,” I say quietly. “I never wanted to hurt him, I wanted to tell him to his face about Sean, but he went to Amsterdam and I arranged to see him when he got back so that I could tell him to his face but he came home early and…” I close my eyes as I think about Cam’s words.
“Thanks Kitten, thanks a lot.”The look in his eyes when he realised who Sean was. I start to cry.
“He turned up at the club and I was there with Sean and I never meant to hurt him, I am so sorry, I haven’t stopped thinking about him for the past two weeks. I just don’t know, I don’t understand what’s going on with me. I think he might be right, I think I do love him, I think, I don’t know.”
Robbie looks at me with eyes so much like Cam’s. “Well that’s something only you can decide Georgia and until that time please don’t go getting my brothers hopes up, because if you decide that you’re wrong or if you leave him again, then I think that would actually kill him.”
I have no reply, I don’t know what to think, I don’t know what to feel. I’m left alone with Cam as what can only be described as a military operation goes on around him, his flat is cleaned, bolts and locks are put on the bedroom door. Benny comes in and goes through every draw and cupboard in the bedroom and bathroom, all while Cam sleeps. I’ve noticed beads of sweat are starting to appear on his forehead and top lip so I go into the bathroom and run a face cloth under the cold tap and come back and wipe his face, he stirs and mumbles but doesn’t wake so I go out to the kitchen to fetch a bowl that I can fill with water so that I don’t have to keep dripping the face cloth from the bathroom. The whole place is now spotless and smells fresh and clean. Robbie is still here, talking on the phone, Benny and another bouncer from the bar are sitting on stools in the kitchen, eating burgers. My belly rumbles because I’ve not eaten today.
“What time is it Ben?”
He looks at his watch. “Ten past six.” Shit, I’ve been here since twelve, I need to get home.
“Ben look, Cam’s starting to sweat, I’m gonna give his face another wipe, then would you take me home, I can’t walk, I have the press up my arse at the moment.” Robbie has ended his phone call and is looking at me.
“Go wash his face and I’ll take you. The doctor will be here to give him something for the sweats and shakes.” I nod, then fill the bowl with cold water and go back to the bedroom.
This time when I wash Cam’s face he opens his eyes, they are a lot more focused now and he looks over my face as he licks his lips, which are dry and cracked. “Kitten,” he whispers in a croaky voice.
“Would you like some water?”
I ask him, he shakes his head. “Scotch.”
I give a little laugh and shake my head. “No can do Tiger, water, tea, coffee, them’s your choices?”
“You’re mean.”
“I know.”
“I love you.”
“I know.”
“Do you?”
“Yes, would you like some water or some tea?” My heart is banging so hard in my chest that it’s giving me a headache.
He sighs. “Will you serve it to me naked?”
“I’ll pour it over your dick if you don’t simmer down.” He gives a little chuckle.
“There’s my angry Kitten.”
