Page 3 of Waiting For Ever
Fuck, Julian. Get your shit together.
I could feel the fissure in my wall like a physical cut. Three years is a long time to feel nothing. I worked at it, got used to it, counted onit. So how could this girl cause a crack within seconds? The sting, the ache was not only shocking. It was unwelcome.
I take a couple deep breaths and let the dry heat do what it does. As my heart rate slows, I continue to berate myself. Allie would be pissed if she knew I came in here commando, but the towels haven’t been restocked yet, and I couldn’t exactly wear my clothes in here. Plus, I needed to chill the fuck out. I didn’t expect Allie’sprojectto affect me like that. Or even make the radar. Beyond wanting to be helpful in a good human kind of way, I’ve gotten pretty good at turning off my feelings. Why now? Why her? But I’m also good at ignoring anything resembling a feeling, should one arise. It’s just been a minute since I’ve needed to. Because it caught me off-guard, I’m now hiding.
Wait. Why am I hiding? From this girl?
Pissed at myself for acting like a prepubescent boy, I throw the sauna door open to head to the locker area to get dressed. One step out of the sauna, however, I slam into a wall of towels. Again! And send the girl flying. Again. What. The. Fuck.
“What the fuck?” I say it more to myself because how is she here smashing into me again? But there she is, sprawled at my feet. The storm-cloud eyes, deer in headlights, staring up at me with her cheeks flaming. At least the flush makes her look less haunted. But I’m no better. I stand there frozen a second too long.
Realizing she’s seeing all my junk, I grab a towel from the floor, wrap it around my lower half and find my voice. “I mean, shit, I’m . . . uh, I’m sorry. Are you alright? I’m not usually in here this early. Can I . . . help you with the towels? Or I can just take them for you. Seriously, are you okay? Uh, Ev . . . Ever . . .?” Jesus, now I’m stammering. What’s her name again? It’s not a common one. And she’s not offering it up.
This waifish girl is just wide-eyed staring up at me, feet out, knees together, legs in an upside-downV, leaning back on her hands. She scoots backward like a scared animal backing down from a predator. Once she’s a few feet away, she finds her voice. “I agree. What the fuck? And, yeah, why don’t you fold them this time? Since I’ve already done it twice.” She stands as she says it, dusting off her butt. “She told me . . . Allie said no one was in here.” And with that, she turned and practically ran out of the locker room.
So much forscared animal. Except for the retreating part. I stare at the place she vacated, trying to get my bearings. I may have misjudged thesave mepart too. That sass I just witnessed didn’t screamsave me.But somehow it captivated me more.
Instead of the locker room, I aim for the nearest sink and splash icy cold water on my sauna-heated face. I ignore my shaky hands, yank the towel off my waist and swipe it down my face. This is going to be a problem. She’s going to be a problem. Bracing my fists on the edges of the sink, I stare at myself, willing my heartrate to return to normal.
You can’t save her, man.Who says she needs saving?I argue with the guy in the mirror.
Didn’t all of Allie’s projects need saving from something at first, including me? Fighting the urge to smash the reflection, I turn and stalk to the locker to retrieve my clothes and get ready for my first client of the day, Drea. I could always count on Drea for a solid distraction. Most days her neediness and blatant attempts at seduction annoy me. Today I welcome it. I only hope she doesn’t bathe in her perfume today. I’m already feeling a little nauseous.
Chapter 3
Everly
My first day has me rethinking everything. Why did I run away from my life? And why do I act like a complete idiot around guys? Or justthatguy? Okay, to be fair, I don’t exactly have instances to compare where there were any guys to act any kind of way around. Except the one incident—the big bad—that sufficiently wrecked my life as I knew it. I spent the rest of the day avoiding him and dodging his stare. And I wasn’t imagining it. Every time I looked up from whatever I was doing, I’d catch his intense blue eyes piercing me in one of the mirrors. I’ve never understood the cheesy term “undressing me with his eyes,” but I think I’m beginning to. I felt naked, exposed, like he could see right through me. And why was he constantly watching me anyway?
He’s probably the most beautiful guy I’ve ever set eyes on. I’m quite sure he could have any woman he wants and probably does. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t like it though. I want to be unaffected by him, but I’m not sure anyone with a pulse could deny his appeal. He obviously works at it. Watching him sweat the day away, showingeveryone from geriatrics to desperate housewives how to work out was beyond entertaining. I could tell the moves weren’t hard for him, but his skin still glistened with the effort of correcting form and demonstrating equipment.
“So, what are we looking at? Oh, solid choice.” The body belonging to the voice sets up close to my ear. “He definitely gives the eyes a workout, as well as the imagination. Am I right?”
My cheeks burn as I turn to the person leaning over my shoulder. “Lilliana, I presume,” I say, recalling Allie’s earlier overview on Fit and the other employees. I smile, not bothering to defend myself, and offer my hand. Do teenagers shake hands?
She looks down at my extended right hand and clasps it in her left like we’re holding hands, not a handshake, squeezes and says, “I like you already,” with a little giggle. “Ooh, it’s Mrs. Stevens. Or Deena, as she insists we call her. How many times has she needed Julian to demonstrate the squat so far?”
“Twice. Is she new?”
“You’d think, right? Nope. She’s been coming to Julian for years. One of his first clients. But she’s not as bad as Drea. Her perfume alone is enough to gag on. But the way she throws herself at him is embarrassing.”
“Perfume Lady was first thing this morning. I think her scent stayed at least an hour longer than she did.”
“Sounds about right. I guess it’s kind of petty, but it’s entertaining watching the Cougar Club compete for his attention. I’ve even heard he’s hooked up with a few.”
“Ewww. I think I just threw up in my mouth,” I joke.
But my heart plummets into my shoes. Why am I so devastated to hear that this beautiful man whores around with women twice his age? What do I care? Shuddering, I swivel my head away from thecougarcompetition and focus on Lilly, as “everyone calls me.” Because of her, I feel like, for the first time since I arrived, that I might enjoy this place.
She slings her arm over my shoulders, pivots me away from the Julian/cougar spectacle and says, “Let’s go get a juice shot.”
I guess shots are my new thing. At least these types of shots won’t get me canceled and ruin my life.
Lilly made the second half of the day fly by, thankfully. Thankful is an understatement. Her personality is everything. I adore her, but by the end of the shift I was sobotheredby the Julian gossip and the cougar parade that I didn’t even stay to work out myself. Allie insisted I learn my own workout so I could better assist at Fit. I bailed. Lilly tried to convince me to stay and workout with her, but I couldn’t wait to be alone and contemplate all I learned on my first day. Now back at Allie’s, I decide to head out to the lake path and at least take a brisk walk and get some fresh air.
Taking her back stairs down to the trail, I stop to stretch and loosen up. Across the cove, the sun glares off the windows of the Blue Brew Café & Marina. Being a seasonal business, it’ll still be quiet for a couple more weeks, then the bustle of campers will keep the whole lake humming until August. I decide right then to make this a daily habit and take advantage of the quiet until the tourists descend.
Blue Lake is just that. Beautifully blue and aptly named, reflecting the sky like a mirror. The air and the view are so inspiring I trade the walk for a run. I welcome the burn in my legs and lungs, and by the time I reach the marina, I’m sucking air. I stop and bend at thewaist, hands resting on my knees, and gulp deep breaths to slow my heart rate. The air and the terrain are not like running in the city on pavement. Once I steady myself, I sit and watch the sunset. I could take the steps down to the dock and sit on the edge or head up to the patio deck and watch from the outdoor dining area off the café. Both were vacant so I could enjoy it in peace. I opt for the higher vantage point of the patio.
