Page 94 of Reverse Pass
“Oh you definitely should have. It was one of my proudest moments as your friend.” She grins, and I manage to get a little laugh out of it.
“I’m pretty sure if I tried that, it would backfire.”
“Well, you could leave a note in his room, or make him dinner one night. Turn his tricks around on him.”
“Maybe,” I say, my mind running with the possibilities for a minute. “The biggest issue is that I barely know when he’s here and time is getting shorter. He’s supposed to find a new place to live and it’s already December. Has he said anything to you about moving out?”
“He’s barely talked to me, and I doubt he would tell me. He knows I love his sexy ass, but he also knows where my loyalties lie.”
“And how lucky I am to have them.” I hug her.
“Ouch. Careful. That one tattoo is taking its time to heal.” She hovers her hand over the spot.
“I’m sorry,” I apologize, and then try to peek at it under her sleeve. “It’s going to be gorgeous when it does heal up though.”
“Yes. Oh, there’s an idea. Get a tattoo. Just have them put LAWTON on your back permanently.”
I laugh hard at the idea, but the more I think about it, the more I wonder if it wouldn’t be the craziest thing to do on earth.
“Or his number?” I say, thinking out loud.
She stops what she’s doing and looks over at me. “No… Really? You’re really thinking about it?”
“I mean, it would convince him I was serious about him, right?”
“Seriously crazy, but in a way I love and would definitely do myself if I was in love with a boy like him.”
“And if it goes wrong, I mean I’ll still watch him play. And there’s laser removal, right?” I look at Joss.
“Right… Are you serious about this?” She eyes me with wary excitement.
“Maybe. I don’t know. I think I might miss him enough to try anything at this point,” I confess, as I watch him line up on the scrimmage line on the TV again, reminding me he’s hundreds of miles away.
Because the truth was, I couldn’t stop thinking about him, wanting him, missing him. I love him in a way I have never loved anyone, and even if he rejects it, I want him to know.
THIRTY
Ben
We win the game,but I struggle to be as happy as my teammates are about it. We’re well on the way to another championship game this year, one I hope we might actually win. One we could win if Colt, JB, Jake and I continue putting up points and our defense continues to be an immovable force on the field.
But unfortunately my heart is also an immovable force. One that can’t seem to forget my roommate even as I try to avoid her. It’s been torture with her still sleeping in the room next door. I’ve been crashing at Colt’s and Jake’s place. I’ve gotten up at the crack of dawn to go for a run in the freezing cold or get to the gym extra early just to avoid having to see her.
I’m terrified of it if I’m honest, because I feel like seeing her is going to make all my resolve come crumbling down. One more look. One more I’m sorry, and I’m a goner. And I don’t want to fall back into old habits.
“You all right?” Colt asks as he jumps into the seat next to me on the bus.
“I’m fine.” I shrug, staring out the window as I watch them finish loading the bus with luggage and signal to the stragglers to get their asses in gear from across the parking lot.
“Two touchdowns tonight, should make you more than fine.”
“Just not feeling the celebration tonight.”
“Me either, if I’m honest.”
“Never were able to resolve things with her then?” I ask, knowing by the look on his face already that the answer won’t be a good one.
“Nope. We’re officially done.”
