Page 65 of Dare to Dance
I stuck out my chin. “Kross, just because we have a daughter doesn’t mean you have to take care of me. Actually, I don’t want you to be my superman.” In part, it was the truth. I had to get on my own two feet and build something for myself.
Pushing off his truck, he walked up to me. Then he gently grasped my elbows before pressing his forehead to mine. He inhaled as though he was trying to suck my energy into him. “What if I want to be your superman?”
I gave him a half smile. “It’s sweet.” So sweet my heart was breaking. I’d traveled one bad road after another. The only good in my life was Raven. She was my shining star. I wanted my daughter to see her mom succeed, not because a man swept me off my feet, but because I worked my ass off to better myself and showed her to do the same as she grew older. My mom had made the mistake of allowing a man to take care of her, and she did have regrets. I wasn’t saying that a man couldn’t sweep me off my feet for love. I just didn’t want anyone to feel obligated to take care of me because of a child.
I touched Kross’s warm cheek. “You need to focus on taking care of Raven. We both do. We both need to show her that we love her.”
“Even though we both get butterflies around each other. That doesn’t mean anything to you?”
“Ruby Lewis,” A squeaky voice said my name from somewhere to my left.
Kross tensed as he let go of me. “Tasha.”
“Nick said you were out here with Kross.” She bounced up with her ponytail swinging high on her head. “Hi, Kross. How’s Kody?”
I raised an eyebrow at him.
“Tasha was the one to tell me you’d been pregnant.”
Figured. Tasha had always been a gossip girl like her mother.
Her chin dipped to her chest before she looked at me. “I see you two found each other. Anyway, my mom is basting the turkey. She wants to know if you would like to come in and stay for dinner.”
“Thanks for the offer,” Kross said. “But Ruby and I have plans.”
Tasha wrapped her long bangs behind her ear. “So, is your brother seeing anyone?”
“He is. Sorry, but we’re late.” Kross bounded around the truck to the passenger door. “Come on, Ruby.”
I waved at Tasha. “Nice to see you. Say hi to your mom.” Awkwardness came to mind when I thought of how dinner would have gone with the Mendoza family. Too many questions that I wouldn’t have been prepared to answer, especially the one that Mrs. Mendoza would no doubt have asked. “How’s your mom?” I shouldn’t have cared about gossip since I didn’t live there anymore. I wasn’t moving back, but my mom had friends there. If she ever decided to return, I didn’t want to taint her relationships with her friends.
I hopped in, and Kross clicked the door shut before he flew around the truck then into the driver’s seat. He threw the truck in gear and sped down the road, leaving Tasha on the curb with her mouth open.
I giggled when he slowed at a stop sign.
“She kept drooling for Kody that day we were up here,” Kross said on a sigh. “Are you hungry?”
“Starving.”For more than food.
“The other day you said you wanted to show me something in the Berkshires. How about after we eat, you show me?”
I was here to visit Riley’s grave, and if he was going to be part of my life, then he needed to know everything, regardless of how that would affect our relationship.
I nodded as I listened to a raspy singer belt out a song that gave me goose bumps. Or maybe the goose bumps were because Kross was offering me his hand, palm up, on the console. I hesitated for a split second, afraid that the moment we locked hands was the moment I would fall deeper for him. That alone scared me more than living on the streets.
19
Kross
Irolledinto a cemetery while Ruby gnawed on her fingers. Over lunch, we’d talked mainly about Raven. Ruby had chatted excitedly about how smart our daughter was. The minute Ruby’s pretty blue-green eyes had filled with tears, I’d changed the subject to something totally random. Sure, I wanted to learn as much as I could about my little girl and the years I’d missed, but I’d gotten choked up a couple of times as well.
The clouds grew darker as I shifted the truck into park. The forecast called for snow. My mom didn’t want me on the road today. I’d explained that I owed Ruby an apology, and I wanted to spend time with her, although I would love to spend time with Raven, too. That wouldn’t happen until I could sort out the paternity test.
“So you want to show me a gravesite?” A morbid chill ran through me as Karen’s small coffin flashed before me. The last time I was anywhere near a cemetery was at Karen’s funeral.
Headstones of all shapes and sizes dotted the landscape out the truck’s window. Flowers gave color to the etched weatherworn gray stones, while the dying leaves kicked up around them. A snowflake fell, then another, slowly covering the windshield.
Ruby climbed out without so much as a word. Her fingers had to be raw from expending all that nervous energy she’d consumed from the restaurant to here. When she’d told me she wanted to show me something, I sifted through my brain but came up empty. I’d gotten the sense she wanted to take me back in time and show me some of the things we’d done when we had dated. The oak tree we’d carved our initials in at the academy came to mind.
