Page 109 of Replay
“Her father and her brothers found out.”He stilled, then slowly walked towards her.He bent down by her chair and rolled backwards onto his butt, so he was wedged between her feet and the bed.“I didn’t know thattheydidn’t know until that point.She was covered in welts, and they saw them.Got it all out of her, I guess.”
He didn’t know?
“The first I knew of it was when the police turned up at the door.”
Alle snorted.“On what grounds?You were in a consensual relationship.Her family might not like that fact, but it wasn’t anything to do with them.Christ!And she was what, twenty-four by then?”
“I don’t know what was said.”He lifted his eyelashes, but looked straight down again when she met his gaze.“I was charged with GBH and rape.”
“For fuck’s sake, what?”
Alle was on her feet, before she thought better of the outburst.That was… That was insane.It also explained the prior arrest and a weight of other things.But, “But that’s not what…” She took her seat again, and his hand.“Spook, that isn’t what happened.”
“She swore before a court it was.”
“It went to trial?”Fuck!“But where was the evidence?”
“All over her body.She was covered in marks, and there were photographs I didn’t know about of previous injuries.We’d had a lot of rough sex.It was literally her word against mine.”His shoulders lifted.“Maybe I’d read it all wrong?”His voice broke under the strain.His shoulders jerked, the tension straining the muscles of his back and shoulders.Alle got down on the floor beside him, but held off touching him beyond holding his hand.He was sporting spines.
He couldn’t believe that.Couldn’t think he’d done anything wrong.She was the adult.
Spook looked up, eyes awash with shadows, like he was still questioning himself after all this time, still wondering if Siv’s version was the actual truth, and if he was every bit the monster she’d claimed.
“You’re not.”Alle murmured.“It was consensual between you.”
Except, of course, for much of the relationship, it hadn’t been.Minors couldn’t consent.
Spook gave an abrupt, almost dismissive nod, like he was determined to push on and say what he needed to, and lingering over this point threatened to derail him
“I had my sisters for support—but two of them were young, still in school—and myFarmor.The local community was erring on the side of caution.People had seen us together.They recalled the trip to the hospital.The way that she’d stopped wearing shorts and always opted for loose flowing skirts, or trousers.”
“Were you—” Dammit, she didn’t want to ask.“Spook, were you sentenced?”
He stayed so quiet, his tongue tracing the edges of his teeth that she was near convinced he must have been.Then, he decisively shook his head.“Some evidence came to light.I didn’t know, but in addition to the photographs, she’d been filming us.I’m not sure how the court got hold of the videos.Anyway, they did, and they told a rather different story—”
“One that tallied with your version of events.”
He nodded.“I guess.Enough that the judge dismissed the case, and had Siv arrested.I don’t recall the exact charge.Lying.Time-wasting.”
“Attempting to pervert the course of justice.”
“I think that’s a British thing.It didn’t matter.I didn’t care at that point.It was all just noise.The accusation still lingered like a bad smell.People still regarded me a monster.I was a monster.Look at all the wounds I’d inflicted.Even if she’d said yes, what sort of bastard would do that?And I was still so young, so of course that made me especially evil.”
Alle tried to touch him then to soothe his pain, but he pulled away from her attempt to stroke his hair.“The real judgement was out there in the world, not in some claustrophobic courtroom.”
Silence seemed to pull in around him, stretching the air until it was taut, and it seemed impossible to move from the positions they were both frozen into.He’d been betrayed.Years had passed, and he still felt it as keenly as if the knife had only just gone in, that much was all too clear.
“I understand—I get it,” he began, choking around the words.“If you’d rather end it now, and not se—”
“What?No.”She almost shook him, staying herself as her hands settled upon his shoulders.“Spook, look at me.”
It took forever for him to lift his head, to raise those baby blues to meet her gaze.“Why the hell wouldn’t I want to see you?You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m positive.”
She wrapped him in a hug, as well as she was able.He was stiff as a board.“The scars,” she murmured into his ear.“I guess it was tough, and you couldn’t see it improving, so you tried to end it.”
His chin dug into her shoulder as he spoke.“That was later.There were other reasons that contributed.”He pressed his lips against her skin and nuzzled into the side of her neck.“I’m sorry, I need a moment.I’ll just be a minute.”
Alle watched him disappear into the bathroom.Her earlier indignation had collapsed down to ashes.But, she still didn’t understand how any of this related to Xane.
