Page 15 of Lost Feather
I changed my mind. The voice wasn’t honey—it was opium smoke. “Did he steer them straight into foster care? Or worse? The streets?” I tried to shake away the bliss that was seeping into me. Because this was bullship. “Stealing food for a little sister or brother is a… crime ofcompassion. I’ve done worse.”
“We can tell, Novice Feather.” Valor raked me with a glance that was equal parts condescension and amusement. “My mission was complete at that point, and I returned here for purification and renewal.”
The group turned away, the new Guides floated back to the outside of the circle, and the next Protector rose from her cushion to speak. “I am Diligence, and my mission was to keep a group of high schoolers from cheating on a college entrance exam." I blinked as she went on and on about shifting the balance by reinforcing the students’ vague worries about getting caught cheating.
“I’m sorry,” I interrupted after a few more minutes, stopping Diligence’s confession of feeling prideful about what an amazing job she’d done on her mission. “I’m still stuck on the last one.”
The main Guide sighed. “Listening is a valuable skill, Feather.”
“Yeah, but I’m not sure I get the whole purpose of us. We are Protectors, yeah? Aren’t we supposed to actuallyprotectthe charges we get?”
“Within limits, yes,” they agreed. “Diligence, a moment?” They lifted one robed arm in a graceful motion, and Diligence returned to her cushion. “Maybe we could let Feather tell us about her life choices on Earth, and then we can all help her understand what went... very obviously wrong.” Their voice turned even more syrupy sweet. “And remember, no matter what you say here, it’s my calling to find a way for you to be cleansed. Just be honest and truly seek to do better. We’ll help you with everything.” And they gestured to the clumps of mud all over my robe. And on my cushion. And the floor all around me.
“Wow, this stuff is really easy to smear around.” I raised an eyebrow when the Guide shuddered. I tried not to smirk when they backed away clumsily as I stood and approached the center spot.Yeah, you can’t handle my smut, Teach.
“Well, Feather? You wanted our attention. You have it.”
I wantedattention? I just wanted answers. And some coffee. And maybe a nap. I bristled, feeling the eyes of all the Protectors and all three Guides zero in on me.
From across the Hall, Sunny gave a double thumbs-up. “You’ve got this,” she stage-whispered. “Rock on.” The others stared at her, murmuring.
Definitely a ride or die birch.
For a second, I was tempted to do a classic confession—I’d been Catholic at least ten times—but I had a feeling none of them would believe how many days it had been since my last confession. “Right. So, you want me to tell you about the most recent life I had?”
The Guide’s laugh tinkled like tiny bells. It made my stomach twist, remembering the naming chime. “It’s obvious from your ignorance of this realm, as well as our unfamiliarity with you, that you have just returned from your first life.” I couldn’t see their face, but assumed the Guide was smiling from the warmth in their voice. Oddly, they kept glancing back at the other tall Guides, both leaning against the wall by the door. Maybe the Guide I was talking to was like the Assistant Manager, and one of those two was the boss?
“Are you sure?” I tried. “I feel like maybe I’ve had a lot of lives already.”
“Trust me, it’s not possible. But do share. We’ll help you understand your mistakes, we’ll get you purified, and in a few more lifetimes, I have a feeling you’ll be glowing brighter than most of your cohort.” A few of the Protectors around me coughed at that; one stifled a laugh.Bassholes.“Now, go ahead. What was your name in your past life?”
“Feather,” I said. “They called me something else at first, but I always… I liked Feather, so I switched it.”
“And your mission?”
“Yeah, I didn’t exactly, um, know what it was.” A few of the Protectors gasped.
The Guide shushed them. “Amnesia from your journey. Unusual, but not unheard of. Were you able to eventually remember it on Earth?”
“Not precisely.” I smiled, thinking of my last charge, Lily. “I mean, I didn’t wake up one day knowing what was going on.”
Mumbles all around me had me shushing the others so I could hear the Guide. “So you didn’t remember your mission at all? No memories of this place, or who your charge was?”
I shrugged. It definitely wasn’t time to spring the “I’ve been on Earth for hundreds of years” news. “I was in Chicago, in a group foster home. I’d been in a few private homes before that. I was born in Des Moines, I think. Anyway, I was twelve when I landed in Chicago itself. I lived on the streets, doing some side work, until I felt the call to a charge when I was about a month shy of eighteen. Lily had just turned six. I knew the minute I saw her, I had to protect her.”
The Guide brightened. “Yes, it’s common to have an urgent feeling to protect one’s charge. Instinctual. Go on.”
“Okay. It wasn’t until I met Mr. Wright that I realized who I had to protect her from. He was a molester. He’d been messing with some of the older girls before I felt called to the home, but when he started focusing on Lily, I…” I had a sudden feeling I shouldn’t mention the voice that instructed me to protect, the one that had taught me about taking on the shadows that formed my smut. They’d probably ask who the voice was, and I didn’t know his name. Or they’d think I was lying or nuts. So I finished weakly, “I knew I had to keep her out of his hands.”
For some reason, the three Guides all seemed to still. One of the pair in the back, Possible Boss Guide #1, spoke. “You were tasked with protecting a child from assault in your first life on Earth?” I nodded. “You swear this was your first journey to Earth?”
“Absolutely,” I said. First and only journey.
“You’re lying. You must be.”
I smiled at the golden hood that hid the face. He’d tried to disguise his voice, but I’d recognize that attitude anywhere. Mr. Deep Sexy Voice himself: Gavriel. “I almost never lie. I’ve only ever been sent to Earth one time.” That much was true. “And I have to say, I’m not that impressed with the job you guys are doing. I mean, let’s face it. Shizz is getting real down there.”
The whole group gasped, and the murmuring grew louder. “Tell us what happened with Lily,” Gavriel rasped out. “The truth.” There was a weird tone in his voice, like a command. It reminded me of when Growly had said “Silent” and “Still.” Like I had no choice but to comply.
