Page 74 of Lost Feather
She let out a nervous giggle. “Inappropriate feelings are sort of my specialty.” I waited for her to collect her thoughts, her eyes revealing so much more of her internal state than she could possibly know. My own heart began to ease, as I saw her come to a decision. “You want me. I want you. Everyone else is gonna think we’re perverts. Is that about it?”
“Oh, at the very least,” I ground out. I had been ignoring both the repeated distant hum of the whole host of Sanctuary expressing their disgust and alarm, and the physical knocking that filtered through the thick wood of the door, and now I muted them in my thoughts entirely. “If the door weren’t locked to all but me, I’m sure they would have torn it down and—”
“I can open it, too,” she whispered. “No one else knows.”
“Of course you can.” A smile stretched over my face. That one small fact revealed more than she could guess. We were mates in truth, and she held enough power to open the door to my Hall. She was no Novice. It mitigated my shame the slightest bit. “You’re my mate, after all. It comes with a few perks.”
“Kiss me,” she said suddenly. “Just one more time.”
My heart thudded with a new agony. Kiss her only once more? Had she decided not to… try this crazed idea? If all I was allowed was one more kiss, I would make certain it was one she would never forget, and that I could dream about for the long, cold years ahead.
Before she could rethink her offer, I leaned over her, placing one hand at the base of her spine to hold her there. She blinked, and her mouth fell open into a small O of surprise. “One kiss,” I promised. “That’s all.”
When our lips met, our tongues and even teeth clashed, both of us seemingly intent on devouring one another. She tasted of roses and sugarcane, a light, floral musk that was instantly addictive. Her lips were softer than petals, and opened under mine like she had been waiting for this moment as long as I had.
I set my other hand at the back of her neck, stroking the feather that lay there wickedly, in a way I knew would elicit a response. She gasped into my mouth, her entire body trembling with the shocks that flowed from that one touch.
“Mikhail?” she asked into my mouth, but I covered up the small sound, my tongue moving, exploring, chasing that elusive, delectable sweetness. Learning every inch of her that she would allow. Her hands were on my arms, small, blunt nails digging in as she squirmed against me. Was she trying to get me to stop? I steeled myself and leaned back, nibbling at her lower lip once more as I fought the urge to strip her bare and show her just how good merging physically could be. Make her beg me to stay with her… No. I had to respect her desires, no matter how hard my own beat at my resolve.
And I had to tell her what weighed down my heart before we grew any closer.
I tried to pull away, but she followed me, her small hands refusing to release their grasp as she yanked me back down. “More,” she moaned sweetly, hungrily.
“I need to tell you—” I began, but she grabbed me harder.
“I’m done with words, Mikhail. This time, I get to choose. And I’m choosing to feel. Not talk. Not torture myself with a soul knife, or be judged by those stupid Guides.” Her eyes were spitting sparks of gold now, her loose hair flying around her head in a silver nimbus as she made her demands. “You can tell me all the things wrong with us later. Right now, I want to be happy. I want to feel… like I’m not a scrap. Like I’mwanted.”
My heart almost broke at her plea. She felt unwanted? I knew I hadn’t told her everything I should, but not giving her what she asked for—begged for—was a hurt I wasn’t prepared to deliver. “I don’t want you, my sweet mate,” I rasped, hurrying on when her eyes welled up. “Ineedyou. Let me show you how much.”
I sent a wordless prayer of thanks as she dove for my mouth again, almost desperate to fuse our lips. I responded with my lips and hands, worshiping her in the only way I might ever be allowed. Answering her wordless request.
I tried to show her with my touch how long I had waited for her. How much joy she had brought into my life in the few short months I’d known her. How much more I wanted to share with her—not just my body, but my heart. My stories, my memories, and my life. But how could I show that with only my lips? I wanted to sing out my love for her so all of Sanctuary would hear.
I wanted her to sing out in her passion, so they would know she was mine.
Finally, she pulled away, almost violently. “Wow,” she gasped, staring up at me, her eyes glazed, lips puffy and pink. “I think… I think if you’d kept doing that, I would have, um…”
My laughter shook the Hall. “Why not let me keep on then?” I reined in my passion, in case she’d decided that was enough. I was mature enough to stop, though my balls ached like they were being unmade.
“Good question.” She chewed at her lip, considering, until I pulled it gently outward with one finger. Blushing fiercely, she finally spoke out loud. “So what you were saying before is we can do it, physically. Merge, that is. That part won’t kill me.”
I nodded slowly. “If my kiss didn’t hurt you, I can control… all the rest.”
She nodded. “Hmm. But—spiritually speaking—we have to play ‘just the tip,’ right?” One of her delicately arched eyebrows wiggled up and down. “I like it. Come on, Growly. Show me what you’ve got under those ridiculously tight leather pants.”
All the air rushed out of my lungs. “Are you… certain?” She was already moving back to the bed, dropping the spangly top behind her, followed quickly by the enticing mini skirt. The workshop was dark, only the fire’s flames giving light, so I couldn’t see much of her, but the curves and shimmering silvery flesh I did see made my mouth water.
She patted the bed next to her as she smiled gently, her chin trembling a little. “Mikhail, don’t make me wait. This time, you can put a piece of you into mewithmy consent. Just don’t fry my circuits.”
I let out a short bark of stunned laughter. “I could never harm you, my sweet soul.” I stood, dropping my robe to the floor, suddenly glad for the low light. I wasn’t perfect like she was. I was scarred and too large.
But her eyes told a different story. As I slipped my trousers down, standing proud and naked before her, her eyes went wide. “Definitely just the tip,” she gasped. “That’s all that’s gonna fit.” I went to my mate’s bed for the first time—toourbed—laughing so hard the rafters shook. “Let me touch you,” she breathed, her smile trembling but excited.
I nodded and lay back, allowing her to slide up and over me. She straddled my abdomen, her damp core nestled against the tip of my erection, but her attention was on my face. She leaned over me, her hair falling in a curtain around us, and this time our kiss was playful, gentle, teasing. She made small noises as she shifted down, exploring the texture of my jawline, nipping, before moving to my chest. I groaned aloud when she found one of my tight nipples and licked it, then bit it lightly. I groaned even louder when she nipped it harder, the tiny flash of pain forcing an answering jerk from my cock.
“Good to know,” she murmured, continuing her explorations further south, lifting herself so she straddled my lower thighs. When her warm hands skated down over my abdomen, I held my breath. Then she gently cupped my balls with one hand, and measured the length of me with the other. “I’m not sure, Growly. You may really be part bear.”
Before I could formulate a reply, her hot mouth closed over the head of my cock, and I arched up on the bed with a loud cry. She made a small sound of complaint as I almost dislodged her, fighting for control.
