Page 31 of Rebound
He freezes and I’m not sure he’s even breathing. He steps closer, pinning me to the counter. “Say it again, Lo. Tell me you don’t want my help.”
I can’t help the shiver. The low murmur of his voice coupled with how close he’s standing, his woodsy scent and the heat in his eyes ruins me. If he wasn’t supporting me, I’d probably be a pile on the floor.
“Why?”
“Why what, baby?” he asks softly.
“Why do you want this?” Why do you want me?
“Because you’re mine, Tamara. Or did you forget?”
I frown at the way he phrases the question. I’ve never been one for possessive partners, I don’t even think it’s attractive in the romance novels I’ve read. But what Patrick’s doing isn’t about owning me, it’s deeper. Stronger.
“The first time you kissed me, do you remember what you said?” I shake my head and he smiles, a small sideways tug of his mouth. “You said ‘whatever happens, Trick, this is forever. You and me. I’m yours and you’re mine’. I never forgot it. In as many years that have gone by, that has never changed.”
Suddenly the memories come flooding back, the tall, pretty boy with the light brown eyes lying below me in the grass. We’d stumbled across the spot while trying to find somewhere to be alone. It became our safe space, the only time when it was just us. I kissed him because I didn’t want to waste any more time. I can hear my teenage voice saying those words to him, the way his face lit up as he flipped us over and kissed me again.
I blink furiously, fighting back the tears. I wish I didn’t remember anything, wish I could erase our past so we could start over. That girl? The one who was so deeply in love with that boy, she still exists. She’s the one gripping his T-shirt tight, afraid he’ll vanish again.
“Yes, I want to be a part of your life because we’re having a baby. We were friends once, right? I want to help and take care of you, I want you to lean on me through all of this. Of course I want to be there for doctor’s appointments. But I don’t want anyone else. I’m not dating or fucking other people. I won’t stop you if that’s what you want to do, but I’d fucking hate every minute of it. And most of all, I’d have dropped literally everything to be here for you, with you. This is my new normal and I’m really fucking excited about it.”
Tucking my bottom lip between my teeth, I let his words sink in. It’s going to be the hardest six months of my life, but I know he’s right. Having him here doesn’t have to be a bad thing. If I let him back into my life slowly, cautiously, the benefits are endless. He’ll take care of me, like he always has. There’s also definitely a part of me scared to do this alone. I’m an independent woman and I don’t need someone to babysit me. But I know help doesn’t have to be a bad thing, especially if it comes in the form of this man.
“Okay,” I whisper and his face lights up. “But we need rules.”
He chuckles and kisses my forehead before releasing me. “Obviously. More tea?” he asks and I nod.
I exhale as he steps away and slump against the counter. Teenage me would not believe I’m standing in a kitchen with Patrick Joseph while he makes me tea. I’ve held so much resentment towards him for years and I’m starting to realise it’s probably a little silly. He’s totally unaware, but also how our lives are now forever intertwined and I can’t keep holding the past against him. I want to let him in, but once bitten, twice shy and all that. And after Kabir, I do my best to hold every man at a safe distance.
He hands me the tea and heads back to the couch. “Come on, might as well get comfortable while you lay down the law.”
I sit with my legs tucked under me and take a sip of the tea. He’s made it perfectly and now I’m irrationally angry with him. Why couldn’t he fuck this up somehow? I hide my muttering by taking another sip and then lower the mug to find him watching me.
“What?”
“Your rules, Lo. Tell me.”
I want to be angry about the nickname. Instead, I sigh and say, “I call the shots.”
“I do like a woman in charge. Okay, what else?”
“No sex. That’s what got us here and we can’t let it happen again.”
“All my research says I can’t really get you pregnant while you’re already pregnant, so…”
“Don’t even try it.”
“No dating or fucking other people, then.”
“Are you sure?” I ask, arching an eyebrow. I have no interest in anybody else right now and even if I did, telling them I’m pregnant and living with the father of my unborn child is a boner killer.
“A hundred fucking percent. Next.”
I roll my eyes at his growl. “No coupley nonsense.”
“What does that mean?”
“When we go out with my friends, no holding hands, no more kissing and touching randomly.”
