Page 13 of From the Ashes
“So?” I avert.
“How was the date? Come on! I want details!” Murmuring way too loud like a schoolgirl who’s way too excited about the latest gossip. Nancy and I have always been close, but when Ben started hitting me, I stopped sharing everything with her. I knew she wouldn’t have it, and I wasn’t ready to leave him yet. So when she opened her door a year ago and found Noah and me with our suitcases, I spilled my guts and told her everything. She was mad at first, then sad because she thought she could have saved me sooner. Anyway, after this, I realized I was done keeping secrets from my big sister, especially since she’s always in my corner, helping me and wanting the best for me. That’s why I told her about Ben and the mysterious stranger stopping by last week. I don’t want to keep things to myself anymore.
“I think—um,” I stutter at the thought of his massive arms stretching when he’d put his jacket off.
“Girl,” she giggles, “you should see your face.”
“Stop it!” I slap the air with a laugh.
“Okay, okay, so tell me, what was it like? Coming back into the arena?” she asks in a lower tone, her brown eyes softening with tenderness and perhaps a bit of worry.
“I was a bit nervous, didn’t know what to wear and all, but…he was really nice about it, really.” The corner of my lips raise shyly as I remember our conversation and how easy it was to talk to him. “It went well, actually. He was…nice and direct.”
“Direct?” She stops.
“He didn’t have the usual bullshitty talk about himself and how great he was and all that.” Reminding myself of some colleagues hitting on me by spreading their wealth and pictures of cars. This isn’t the way to my heart. I have already given a shot at the over-confident, colgate smile, power-driven, Playboy type, and nothing could repulse me more now.
“Okay, I see. So that’s good, huh?” she says as she pours me a glass of her homemade lemonade.
“Yes, I guess,” I blush, “I know I shouldn’t compare him to Ben, but?—”
“Yeah, you can, especially since that’s your only way to compare; it’s okay to do so.” She smiles gently at me. “Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
“You know how Ben used to tell me that I was always talking too much and making conversation about me?” I tell her as I watch her shake her head and frown.
“That guy should have kept his mouth closed because whatever he says always sounds like shit,” she mutters.
“Anyway, I was talking to Carter about?—”
“Wait, his name’s Carter?”
“Yes, didn’t I tell you?”
“You didn’t. Trust me, I would have remembered. Carter,” she says as if she’s testing the sound of it. “I like his name,” she murmurs.
“Well, I was talking to him about my to-do lists. I know it’s not the best topic for a date, but whatever, and I realized I was going on about it, so I stopped talking and apologized, and he asked me to finish my sentence. He said I had stopped and he wanted to hear more about it. I…I just… It felt nice to be acknowledged and actually listened to.”
“Lana,” a little crease around her eyes, “you deserve a man who listens to you, even Alec listens to my extremely detailed rundown of what I did at the grocery shop, and that’s the cutest thing ever.” I smile, thinking about my brother-in-law and how patient he is with my sister, and I hope I’ll get the chance to find my own person one day, too.
You won’t. Ben is your person. You’re just too ashamed to admit it and work for it.
“Lucky you, Sis.” I smile, glancing back at the kids. “He offered to teach me self-defense next Thursday.” I bite my lip as Nancy drops the knife to the counter and her eyes widen.
“No way!”
I chuckle. “I think it could actually be great to know a few moves.” Her smile fades as she frowns, worry painted on her face.
“You know we’re always there if you need us, right? You never have to see him alone,” she says quietly, and I’m grateful for her help, especially since her home has been the drop-in and drop-off station for Ben on his visiting days for a year now.
“I know, I know, but I'd feel better knowing how to defend myself in case I need to one day.” I swallow at the hard truth.
She nods, a shadow of sadness passing on her beautiful face. “I get it, you do what you gotta do to feel good.” She looks back at her vegetables. “Okay, now, let’s be serious for a second, was he hot?” I burst into laughter at her serious gaze as if we’re discussing world economics.
“Hot is an understatement,” I admit, because this man, gosh, this man was closer to a Greek God than an actual human. And his tattooed hands and his broad shoulders, well, I’m sure he could lift my petite body like a feather. He also had a light stubble, which only made me want to run my finger through it to feel the scratch on my skin. There was something about him that was incredibly mysterious, and yet I felt as if I could read him completely.
“Oh, that’s good, that’s really good,” she says, clapping her hands once.
“What’s good?” asks Alec, passing behind Nancy and kissing her cheek before grabbing a glass of water.
