Page 73 of From the Ashes
“Do you get it?” He doesn’t answer. His shoulders rise and fall too fast. “Of course you don’t,” I say. “You’re not a man. You’re a little boy who’s never been told no. Well, today’s the day. You’ll stick to your visits, and that’s it.” His nostrils flare. He walks toward me, towering like a predator.
His dark brown eyes stare into mine, and he rasps angrily, “Careful, Lana, you’re not in a position to discuss right now.” I frown. Why would he say that? “It’s not up to you anymore. I want you home, so you’ll come back,” he rubs his chin with his hand, a devilish smile appearing on his face, “you do that or…I’ll report you for child neglect and take Noah away from you.”
My heart stops.
The silence in the room is choking the air, as if the oxygen had turned into a ton of bricks. And then I feel it.Oh, that’s what it is.I had only brushed the top of it when I yelled at the top of the mountain. It wasn’t fully there before. But it’s here now. Boiling and sizzling under my skin. A wrath so powerful, I wonder if my vision isn't turning crimson. All this time, I had it in me. All this time, it prepared me for this exact moment. I inhale deeply and circle him fast, but I don’t get out of the room; instead, I shut the door. My son won’t have to be another victim of his. I turn myself to face him, unflinching, chin up, both of us settled at the opposite sides of the room, his gaze faltering a bit, as if he hadn’t expected my reaction.
“WHAT. DID. YOU. SAY?” I shout, heaving, anger pulsing in my veins like never before.
“You heard me right, I'll take him away from you,” he repeats casually, putting his hand in the pockets of his black slacks.
“Youthinkyou can takemyson away from me?” My voice is surprising me. I don’t sound like the calm, organised, nice people pleaser version of myself. This voice is different, unhinged, borderline insane, as if a laugh was about to come out of my throat. And I bet that’s what any mother would sound like at the threat of having her child taken away from her.
“Why not? You did it. Took him in the middle of the night and ran. I can do the same.”
“I did what I had to do to protect him. You gave me no choice!” I yell, my tone sharper than a knife.
“To protect him fromme?” he spits. “Don’t rewrite history. What did I ever do to him?” He points his finger at me. The air crowds in my lungs, my hands tingling, water starting to blur my vision without a single tear falling.
“YOU STOLE HIS INNOCENCE, YOU IMBECILE!” I shout at the top of my lungs. Ben steps back, as if I had punched him.
“You’re hysterical!” he snarls. “Sorry to break it to you, darling, but you were in it as much as I was. You were the one provoking me. It’s on you too!” he fires back with an accusing index.
“Provoking you? PROVOKING YOU?” I lift my shirt, showing the scar on my ribs. “Here.” I grab my hair, twist it into a knot to expose my nape, where I know a deep scar is imprinted from the time he hit me with a book. “HERE!” I shout. “And so many other places.Youdid this, Ben. It’s time you take responsibility.” I’ve stepped closer, the distance between us ending up in just a meter. He looks at me deadpan and laughs. A cold, spine-chilling laugh.
“And what are you going to do? I’ll create false reports from your coworkers. Say you’re unstable. Unsafe for Noah. I’ll make people believe it.” His smirk twists into something monstrous, and then, without warning, he lunges. His hand flies toward my throat, but I react faster. I duck, pivot, and slam my heel into his shin. He stumbles. I grab his wrist and twist his pinky and ring finger back with both hands. Thank God for Carter’s lessons. Ben yelps in shock, eyes wide, jerking back.
“Don’t ever touch me again,” I hiss. He’s completely stunned, holding his fingers with a wince. My heart slams against my ribs. When I speak, I’m composed, ready.
I’m not calming the storm.
I am the storm.
“Listen to me carefully. You can try all you want to threaten me with false accusations and made-up testimony. But the reality is that I am a good mother. I’M A DAMN GOOD MOTHER. Everybody knows it, EVERYBODY. Noah’s teachers, doctors, parents at school, my own family, the neighbors, and every single person that met us know it. But you? No one here has ever met you, you’re the ghost of a father who’s already been replaced.” His jaw flexes at the mention of Carter. “Howdare you threaten me when I’m the one who can put you behind bars?” His lower lip shakes for a second. “I took several pictures throughout the years. Bruises, cuts. And videos, so many videos of you hitting me in our living room, all of them with your face exposed and recognizable.”
“You’re lying,” he sneers.
“Look for yourself,” I say, pulling out my phone and sending him the video I kept locked away. “It was Valentine’s Day. How could I forget? It’s not every day my husband tries to choke me with the scarf I gave him.” Ben pulls his phone from his back pocket. His face drains as he sees it, livid, colorless. “I made copies,” I add. “So don’t bother deleting that one.”
“You’re not yourself,” he says, shaking his head like denial might save him. Like questioning my sanity could erase the truth. Maybe I’m not sane. I did stay in an abusive marriage because I thought I could fix him.
“I’m not alone anymore. There are people in my corner now, ready to help me. Ready to protect Noah and me. So I suggest you stick to the schedule and treat me with respect if you want any chance of staying in Noah’s life.” I’m not shrinking for him. I’m taking up space, holding the room with eyes wide open, unafraid and unforgiving. “Do you understand?” I shout, one final time. A few seconds pass. His mouth twists, like he’s choking down whatever venom he wants to spit. And then, the miracle happens. A slight nod. Just that. But his silence says more than words ever could. I nod back, and the last pound of weight lifts off my shoulders, crumbling into dust.
It’s over. I did it. I stood up for myself. And I won. I wasn’t sure about pressing charges, not until today. But he laid hands on me again. That’s it. I won’t say anything now, not in front of the kids. I won’t risk another scene. But I know. Iwillpress charges. Starting today.
There’s a knock on the door.
“You okay, Lana?” says Alec firmly, his gaze locked on Ben. I nod, realizing I must look flushed and tense, eyes watery. “Time to go,” he orders Ben, and I’m grateful for it. Ben straightens, grabbing his coat with stiff fingers. He doesn’t say a word and storms out. I follow him to the kitchen, where Nancy is cooking while the kids are still coloring at the island.
“Everything alright?” asks Nancy, giving me a worried look, probably from the yelling they must have heard behind the door. I smile at her, wide and genuine, and kiss my son's hair.
“Everything’s right where it needs to be,” I say, nodding at her. She grins back with understanding, her shoulders relaxing.
“Noah, your father’s leaving,” I declare, because there’s no world in which I’m letting this abuser get away with my son after what he just threatened. He’ll have to talk to my lawyer the next time he wants to see any of us.
“Already?” says Noah, his eyes darting between me and his father. Then a smile spreads across his face. “Mom, can I go with Chloe and Ava to the park?” I sigh, relieved he only sees the bright side of it.
“Of course, honey,” I reply, my whole being focused on being a human shield for my boy.
