Page 63 of The Shape of Your Heart
‘Maybe later,’ she says smoothly. ‘I’ll put it in your fridge.’ She pauses. ‘Unless you’re busy?’
Glancing at my letter, I pick it up before she can read it. ‘Emily, what exactly are you doing here?’
‘I’ve just spent Christmas with my folks.’ Shaking her sleek brown hair back, she rolls her eyes. ‘It was getting a bit too much – Father droning on about the Boxing Day shoot, while Mother’s planning her New Year’s Eve party… Deadly dull. I’ll probably head back to London. But as I was at a loose end, I thought I’d look you up.’
‘You won’t find any excitement around here,’ I tell her. ‘My life these days revolves around work and my garden.’
‘That’s all?’ She arches one of her eyebrows.
‘Tea?’ I say pointedly.
‘Sure.’ She wanders across to the window. ‘It’s quite a view. But don’t you get lonely here?’
‘Never,’ I say firmly. ‘It’s the kind of life I’ve needed for a long time.’
‘It would make a nice weekend bolthole.’ Coming over, she rests a perfectly manicured hand on one of my arms. ‘We had such fun, didn’t we, Nathan? Don’t you ever think about us?’
There’s no apology, no,how are you,or,I’m sorry for letting you down.As she speaks, alarm bells are going off. Stepping back from her, I pass her a mug. ‘Not really. Life’s moved on. And let’s see – it’s been, what, eighteen months? What have you been up to in that time?’
Going over to the sofa, she sits down. ‘I’ve been busy. Work has been sending me all over the place – Dubai, the States, Milan, Paris…’ Emily works for an exclusive jeweller, hence the large, intricately designed ring she wears on the middle finger of her right hand.
I perch on the other end. ‘Sounds nice.’
‘It is.’ She pauses for a moment. ‘But what I’ve realised is how much more it means when you have someone to share it with.’
Seeing the look in her eyes, I feel uncomfortable. Emily has never been subtle and having seen it all before, I know exactly what her game is. She’s come here because she wants something. ‘I’m sure there have been plenty of guys in your life since you and I split up.’
‘One or two, maybe,’ she says casually. ‘But none of them were like you.’ Edging closer, her hand is back on my arm.
In the nick of time, I hear my phone buzz with a text. ‘Excuse me a moment.’ Getting up, I go to find my phone.
The message is from Callie.
It was good, but a bit strange… Not sure about New Year’s Eve. I’ll text you.
At least non-committal is better than an outright no. Switching off my phone and putting it down, I glance across at Emily. ‘Would you like a tour of the garden?’
She glances down at her pale pink boots with stiletto heels. ‘I’m afraid I’m not really dressed for it.’
Those few words symbolise everything that’s changed. As she speaks, I find myself yearning for Callie, who with her windswept hair and off-beat clothes, her honesty and outspokenness, could never be contrived about anything. Going back to the sofa, I sit down, fixing my eyes on Emily’s. ‘What is this really about?’
She holds my gaze, then she looks away. ‘Fuck it, Nathan. You were always able to see through me. OK – so I had a row with the folks. They’ve said they’re stopping my allowance. Just like that. They said ‘I should be able to manage’ , is how they put it. I’m beyond furious. It’s completely unreasonable of them. I’ve no idea what they expect me to do.’
‘Maybe stand on your own feet like everyone else?’ Taking in her shocked expression, I go on. ‘You earn a decent salary, Emily. There’s no reason you can’t survive on it.’ When she looks uncomfortable, I frown. ‘Is there?’
As she drops the act, there’s angst in her eyes. ‘I have debts, Nathan. My own stupid fault, of course. I thought if you and I got back together…’
‘I’d bail you out?’ I can’t believe how outrageous this is. ‘Em, the world doesn’t work like that. You need to pay your way, not suck other people in to solve your problems.’
‘Ouch.’ She shoots me a look.
‘It really isn’t complicated. Sell your flat and find a cheaper one – or move slightly out of town. Then with the rest of your money, start repaying your debts.’
Her gaze is beseeching. ‘But if we…’
‘There is nowe,’ I tell her firmly. ‘There never will be. You made it perfectly clear when I was ill. We were over a long time ago.’
She sighs. ‘Can I ask one favour?’
