Page 117 of Wild Lily
“We’ll weather this,” Julian said with a steely will and a bit of bravado. “I will.”
“Your determination is welcome, Your Grace. But we are in desperate straits. I’ve done the tally. Our mortgage payments equal now more than half our income.”
Lily’s mouth dropped open. Her father always said that one did not accumulate debt greater than a tenth of one’s income. Julian’s was more than half?
“Lack of money,” Julian said with a weary sigh. “It rules estates, marriage, even the question of love.”
The question?Was there a question of Julian’s love for her?
Lily’s head reeled. She stepped backward, her palms to the rough wood of the stall to steady her. How much of Julian’s statement was true? She had believed he had married her at the very least because he valued her. Liked her. Even desired her.
She had thought that as their marriage progressed, that he and she had a relationship built of respect and passion which could blossom into love.
Could she have deluded herself?
Julian was pacing, his footsteps crunching dried hay. “I had approximately eight thousand pounds left. I used half to spruce up Willowreach before my wedding. So I have the cash for the servants, Leland. I’m happy to pay it. It’s the one request my father made of me that makes me proud of him.”
Lily put her hand to her throat. Tears blurred her vision. That her husband would use his money to save his sister from a disastrous marriage was valiant. That he’d use it to refurbish his home for her was sweet.
But if he loved her wealth more than her, what value did he place on their marriage?
* * *
“Are you concerned about the reading of the will tomorrow?” She ventured to ask Julian in their bedroom that night, hoping to draw him out and have him confide in her.
“My mother will wail,” he said, shrugging out of his robe and kicking off his slippers to climb into bed naked. “She always expects more than she gets. Nothing new there. An embarrassment. As for Elanna? She appears to be without emotions.”
“I worry about her.” Lily walked around to Julian and sat beside him. “I hate to think how much she dislikes him.”
“Dislike? Hardly,” he said, wincing. But he took her by the wrist and planted a seductive kiss in her palm. “Don’t think of it. Come here.”
Happy to do that, she bent closer.
His lips on hers were a brand.
“I miss you,” she whispered.
“I’m here.” His eyes cleared, registering her complaint. But he chose to turn it aside and sank to nibble at her shoulder. “Always have been.”
She didn’t want to argue, but she pushed away. His large dark eyes swept over her, desire for her sending her into a frisson of need. She trailed one hand over his muscular chest to his lean hip and groin. “After the will is read, we’ll put our lives in order, won’t we? And get back to adventures in hay stacks and carriages?”
He threw back his head to laugh and grabbed her to him for a stunning kiss. “We’ll do them all, Your Grace. But first—” He wiggled his brows, happy for the moment. “Why don’t you perfect how well you ride?”
He was too disarming. “Haven’t I proven that?”
“With my horses, darling. Not with me.” He led her to spread her legs and sink over him, large and hard as he was.
Her mouth fell open. Her body swelled to take him inside. And she was lost, found, swept up, his arms around her.
As his fingers pushed up her negligee, she surrendered conscious thought. As he bared her to him, she gave up to his every caress. When he sucked her nipples into diamonds, Lily arched up into that lusty realm where he made her soar and tremble. As he rocked her to a throbbing height, she joined him in the rapture she craved. Later, mindless, she crashed into his solid embrace.
Reality returned with a piercing thought. In the midst of enjoying him, she’d forgotten that new torment that he might not love her. The lack cut her like a knife. The wound, salved by his caresses, went deep. No sutures bound it up.
Searching for remedies, she laid awake for hours while Julian slept on. The only one was simple—and superficial. She could seduce him to remain in bed with her for endless days where she might have physical proof of his devotion.
But that was foolish.
A young girl’s daydream.
