Page 29 of Runes To Rain
Entry 173 - concentus
Finally, things are going my way.
Practice has been going well. The guys are figuring out how to accompany my voice, and I’ve memorized all the lyrics. Thankfully, I’ve always been good at memorization, so it didn’t take me long. We’ve even started to work on some new material. It has been helpful to focus on the upcoming concert. Focusing on our music has allowed me to put my energy into something new, something creative and far less serious than our magic work.
The guys continue to grow on me. Despite their continued lack of ownership in the situation they created by welcoming that girl into their mansion, their decision-making as a whole is tough to question.
They’ve sure made a name for themselves as musicians. Reem is an excellent leader and has a good sense of what the fans will enjoy. Fem is excellent at songwriting. Lent is solid in his role of researching magic for our other purpose, and he is quite talented on the guitar. Plus, they’ve really buckled down to learn what I can teach them when it comes to magic.
I’ll even admit I’ve learned a bit from them as well.
They eventually stopped talking about visiting the girl. I think it’s partially because they were turned down last time. I did try to tell them that people with addictions usually do better if they aren’t confronted by elements of their past lives while they’re in early recovery. They did listen when the professionals agreed with me, so I can’t be that mad about it.
Hopefully, she recovers quickly and can get an apartment somewhere. I was happy to pay to get everything on the right track and get her out of our hair, but my generosity is not boundless.
I keep forgetting to ask the other guys about summoning that demon again. We need to do that soon. We haven’t been making much more progress on creating rain. I know weather magic is difficult, but I’m sure we should be further along by now. We must be missing something, and I’m sure the demon would be able to help.
Actually, I’ll go talk to the guys about it now.
AWHILE LATER
Imove gingerly as I walk to the tables on schedule for our midday meal. My abdomen still aches under the bandage. The healer tells me that it will take a while to feel better. He hasn’t been wrong about anything so far, so I believe him. Sometimes the voices tell me otherwise, but I’m learning to ignore them. Last time the healer checked the wound, he said the stitches should come out soon. Hopefully that helps.
The mental work has been difficult, and it’s taken me a while, but I’m beginning to be able to shut out the voices in my head. The healer, whom I see twice daily, tells me I need to allow them to talk but turn the volume down so I can’t hear them. It’s not easy when they seem to make so much sense, but he says that’s because of my addiction, whatever that is. All that really matters is that I’m making progress, and they tell me if I make progress, I’ll be able to leave someday.
I try not to think of the boys and Malam. That life feels like it barely happened, like it only exists in my deepest memories. I protect it from everyone here and am careful not to share details, just small, unimportant things here and there. Dresses I liked, listening to the boys' music, and how much I liked goodcoffee. Maybe if I were sharing more, I’d heal quicker, but it’s the one thing I have left that means something to me. The thing that feels like it makes up the core of me, and I haven’t been able to give it up just yet.
For the meal, I sit at the table and eat what I’m given. One of the other patients starts screaming, and the healers and other attendants rush to him. I’m so used to outbursts at this point that I continue on, eating the food in front of me, wondering how much more healing I’ll need to do before I can leave.
I truly miss coffee.
DIO’S JOURNAL - ENTRY 190
Annum:5614
Entry 190 - periculum
I’m beginning to worry we might have made an error. I kept forgetting about summoning that demon. Malam is his name, I guess. When I finally remembered and asked the guys about it, they agreed it was a good idea. We decided to wait until after the concert since we had so much going on leading up to it.
I wrote about the concert in my last entry, so I won’t dwell on it here, but being in front of that crowd, gah. Seeing the crowd lose themselves in our music, the moment we started playing for them. The noise of all those people as they screamed for us. Something to hold onto while I deal with this mess.
After the concert, it took a few days before we remembered and had time, but then we completed thesummoning ritual forthe demonMalam in the morning. It’s always a weird feeling waiting around after that ritual. When he did show up, the conversation started off well. He watched our process and had some feedback for the other guys that I agreed with. We finally made some progress.
It all started to go wrong as we wrapped up and invited him to have dinner with us. When he sat down at the table, I was shocked when the first thing he asked about was how Chaosta was doing. I shared that we’d finally gotten her into a facility to help with her recovery. Before I could share more about why, or tell him that she was spying on us that night and putting everything at risk with her addiction, he fucking freaked out. He stood up so quickly that his chair tipped over. Then he came at me like he was going to kill me. I can still feel his hand around my throat and have bruises where he slammed me against the wall.
He was snarling about who did this and why we’d think she was an addict, and it all got to be a lot. If he’d been anything other than a fucking demon, I would have put him in his place. Thankfully, I have excellent self-control, or he might even be dead.
I couldn’t even speak for myself with his hand around my throat. The guys were talking, but they were all going at it at once, and I couldn’t understand anything they said. I’d have thought Reem would be able to get control of the situation, but I think Lent was leading the chaos as always.
Then, just as suddenly as he freaked out, he was striding out the door without another word. I’m still not sure exactly what set him off or where he went, but I’m reluctant to summon that particular demon again. He was clearly enraged about something with that girl. Until today, I didn’t even know that he was aware of her existence.
The guys were upset after he left. I think they’ve trusted him as an expert in teaching them magic and are worried he won’t return after how he reacted. I’ve tried to reassure them that once we can actually talk with him and explain how Chaosta was spying, he’ll understand why she’s better in the facility for now. I’m even willing to consider having her live here again once she’s recovered if that’s enough to mend things because fuck, the guys are angry at me.
It’s not as though I haven’t endured far worse. It’s just unfortunate timing after the high of the concert. We really need to make progress with our magic, and now having him around to teach us would be difficult, I think. That’s if he’s even willing, with how enraged he was. I’ll figure it out, I always do. There’s so much more at stake that we can’t risk.
KNIGHT IN SHADOW ARMOR
Breakfast the next day is again bland porridge. I’m yet again wishing for coffee. It’s a mark of how desperate I am that I’d probably even drink the stuff Reem makes at this point.
