Page 5 of After Everything
He blinked, then shook his head slightly, like he was trying to clear it. "The truth about what? Emma, you're scaring me. What's going on?"
His voice was so convincing. Concerned. Confused. If I hadn't spent the last hour reading his messages to another woman, if I didn't already know what was coming, I might have wanted to believe him.
God, part of me still wanted to.
"The truth about what?" I repeated. My voice stayed level, but something sharpcrept into it. "Really? That's how you want to do this?"
"I don't—" He spread his hands, the picture of innocent confusion. "I don't know what you're talking about. I came home and there's a suitcase by the door and you're sitting in the dark and—" He gestured at the wine stain. "Did something happen? Just tell me what's wrong and we can fix it."
We can fix it.
Like this was some misunderstanding. Some problem we could work through together.
I picked up my phone. Unlocked it. Turned the screen toward him.
"Does this help?"
His eyes dropped to the screen. I watched his face as he read. Watched the exact moment he recognized what he was seeing: his iMessages with Sarah, the conversation thread open, her name at the top.
Something flickered across his expression. Not quite panic. Not quite guilt. Something in between.
"Emma." He looked up at me. "We worktogether. You know that. She's co-counsel on the case, we have to coordinate?—"
"Do you want me to start reading them out loud?" My voice was still calm. Too calm. "Because I can. I've had plenty of time to go through all of them. Months' worth, actually."
His mouth opened. Closed. The color was draining from his face now.
"Or maybe I should start with the photos she sent you? Would that be easier?"
"Emma—"
"The truth, David." I leaned forward slightly. "That's all I asked for. And you looked me in the eye and pretended you had no idea what I was talking about."
He was quiet for a long moment. His hands gripped his knees. When he finally spoke, his voice was different. Quieter. Almost resigned.
"I never meant for this to happen."
I waited.
"Sarah and I… when we reconnected for the case, it was just professional at first. But we have history, you know? And we were spending so much time together, and—" He ran a hand through his hair. "Things have been hard between us, Emma. You've been so busy with work, and I've been busy, and we barely see each other anymore. We've been drifting apart for months. Maybe longer."
I stared at him.
He was blaming me.
Not directly. Not in so many words. But that's what this was.Things have been hard.Like our marriage falling apart was a mutual failure. Like my working twelve-hour shifts to keep people alive was somehow equivalent to him fucking his college friend in hotel rooms.
"So this is my fault?" The words came out sharper than I intended. My control was slipping. "I work too much, so you had no choice but to sleep with Sarah?"
"That's not what I'm saying." He leaned forward, like he was trying to make me understand. "But Emma, come on. You have to admit we haven't been connected in months. When was the last time we had a real conversation? When was the last time we went on a date, or even had dinnertogether? You're always at the hospital, and when you're home, you're exhausted. I'm not saying what I did was right, but you can't pretend like everything was fine between us."
The room tilted slightly. Or maybe that was just me.
He was serious. He actually thought this was a reasonable explanation. That our marriage having problems, problems I didn't even know we had, somehow justified five months of lying to my face. Of using my work schedule to plan his affair. Of coming home and kissing me after being with her.
Inside, I was screaming. Inside, I wanted to throw something, to hit him, to make him feel even a fraction of what I was feeling right now. My hands were shaking again. My vision was blurring at the edges. Everything he was saying was making it worse, making it more real, making me realize that the man sitting across from me wasn't the person I thought I'd married.
But I didn't let him see it.
