Page 61 of Not A Homie, Lover Or Friend
I went to my closet and grabbed the Polaroid we had used a while ago. I held her hand up and placed mine alongside it. I snapped a photo because I wanted to remember the night I spent with the love of my life, my fucking wife.
HARVEY
Myles and I headed over to Diamond’s before heading to see the kids before we took off. Myles pulled at his overalls, “You just had to pick this dumb shit,” he complained.
I laughed because he looked so cute, but it was so fucking fitting. He and I were going as Chuckie and Chuckie’s bride. When we got to Diamond’s, Yana swung the door open, “Happy Zooloween!” she squealed.
Yana held baby Love in her arms while Diamond stood behind her, “Waddup nigga!”
They were the Flintstones. Love was Pebbles, Yana was Wilma, and Diamond’s goofy ass was Fred. Preach came from the kitchen with a cup in his hand. The laugh that erupted from me was uncontrollable. “Where the hell did you find that wig?” I asked.
Preach sucked his teeth, “Foe’s momma hooked me up.”
I laughed as we stepped inside. Myles came around me, pointing his knife at Preach, “Fuck you frarrah-kannie-annie ass nigga.”
Preach had on a plain suit, with his glasses and an auburn-colored wig that had been tailored to a short haircut. The man really did look like Malcom X.
“Damn, Foe, you do look like that nigga Chuckie, ugly ass,” Diamond joked. “Aye, Yana, get Love away from the nigga you know Chuckie be fucking with the kids and shit.”
Myles smacked his lips, “Nigga fuck you!”
The door opened, and Samara and Dio came in. “Aye!” Dio shouted. “Foe, you picked the perfect shit. Preach, aren’t you supposed to be at church?” he laughed hysterically.
Samara smiled. She made a cute Harley Quinn, while Dio depicted the best Joker. Navi came in as a witch, a sexy one at that. It was nice to be in a space where Preach and Navi could be in the same room without arguing. It was sad to see them break up, but it was good that they kept things cordial.
We took pictures as we waited for the others to arrive. When Monfua stepped through, Navi’s head flew back because he wore a wolf mask, no shirt, and black jeans. Lakia stepped in behind him. She was Little Orange Riding Hood. Her outfit was banging, I couldn’t lie.
Monfua stepped over to Myles, and they dapped each other up. I could see Lakia looking at me, so instead of rolling my eyes, I spoke. “Hey, Lakia, you look good,” I told her.
She smiled. “You too, girl.”
Mali, Peanut, and Streets came in as the Ninja Turtles with a twist. They had the mask, Samari turtle shield packs, but no shirt and jeans. “Ok, Ok, I see you.”
Diamond moved around the house, “Where the fuck is Chev and Zu?”
“Nigga I’m here!” Zu yelled.
We all looked at him as he and Sasha were Gomez and Morticia Addams. Sasha was wearing the hell out of that blackdress and wig. Dio jumped up and down in front of Zu, “Nigga you clean as fuck!”
Foe snarled, “Zu nigga, whose funeral are you going to?”
Zu gritted. “Yours if you don’t back the fuck up.”
The sound of Diamond cackling made everyone look. “Zu nigga you got the wrong shit on. Gorilla nigga not the nigga who works at a mortuary.”
It was nice to capture everyone walking through the door with their costumes. The Zoo had grown into a big family, one I didn’t know I needed. Seeing the guys expand like this was good, but I was more proud of Chevy for taking it all on. When Zaria stepped through the door in her fitted, ripped orange dress, I was confused until Chevy stepped in, holding the twins. “Tarzan and muhfuckin’ Jane,” I mumbled. “So fitting.”
The twins were baby Tarzans. I was surprised that Zaria let Chevy come out of the house shirtless. They stood side by side as I held my phone up and took a picture. “You look good, Chev,” I said.
“Don’t he, though?” Zaria said as she and Chevy gazed into each other’s eyes.
They were probably ready to leave the twins just to go back home to fuck. “Y’all better stop before you have another set of twins.” I laughed.
“Shitting me. These two niggas and Samara are enough,” he said.
I turned and watched everyone in the house. “Can we all go to this party, have fun with no shit, please?”
They all got quiet as they stared at me like I was crazy. “What’s Zooloween without us fuckin’ shit up?” I heard a deep voice in my ear.
