Page 56 of Waiting to Lose
“How couldyoutell? I’m not even sure Ido?”
“You always give men nicknames if you think they’re worthy. Jake was a ‘fine piece of ass,’ and Rob… Well, Rob seems to get a new name daily.”
Kendra took a sip from Madi’s soda as she contemplated her insightfulness. “I never really thought about it, but maybe you’re right.”
“I think you two would be adorable together!” Madi bounced with excitement.
“Put the bride magazines back in the closet of your hopeful mind. I don’t want to have his babies. I just might… want to see what’s hidden under his bulging zipper.”
“Maybe underneath it is a bulging heart!” Madi quipped.
“What did that piece of ass do to you? You’re ridiculous. I may have to dump you if you don’t stop trying to place your happily-ever-afters into my black heart. They don’t fit. There’s no room for misguided birds. In my world, there aren’t wings. Every bird falls flat on its face.”
Madi studied her for a moment and Kendra recognized the look on her face.
“Do NOT start thinking I’m a puzzle. I know that look. My pieces are scattered. A few are locked away in a vault. You won’t put my pieces together. I like being broken.”
“I didn’t even have to say it, Ken. You said it yourself. There’s a part of you that’s broken. Someone really hurt you, didn’t they?”
Kendra’s eyes narrowed as her lips pressed together. “No one hurts me. I’m the hurter. I turn men into boys.” Kendra laughed but it wasn’t genuine.
“You know,” Madi began, “I’ve heard that when a bone breaks, sometimes the area over the break becomes the strongest part. It grows back better than before. I’d like to think that’s what happens to your heart. When it gets broken, it eventually heals and makes you love stronger than you did before.”
Kendra twisted her lips into a frown. “Or it never fits together the right way again.”
“Or… it becomes unique and more priceless than before.” Madi could tell by Kendra’s face twitching that it was time to switch the subject. “How was your test?”
Kendra smiled as she cocked her head to the side. “Fucking aced it!”
And she was back. Madi listened as Kendra talked about her composition and the internship she was doing for a production company in the Loop next semester. As she listened, she wondered what it would take for Kendra to find a little happiness of her own. The kind of happiness Madi had only ever felt with Jake.
