Page 18 of A Case of You
He leaned against Brandon. “Ihatefeeling like this,” he whispered.
Brandon kissed his temple. “I know, buddy. It’s okay. You overdid it and crashed yourself. Part of what you’re feeling right now is due to how exhausted you feel and how much pain you’re in. It’s messing with your emotions. That’s what the doctor said. You need to remember this and learn to take it easy.”
“This isn’t fair. We’re supposed to get our happily ever after now.”
“Wehavethat. We have each other, and Emma.”
Grace cleared her throat from nearby.
“And the bonus daughter, who shouldn’t be eavesdropping on our conversation.” Brandon glanced in her direction.
Grace appeared in front of Jeff. “Sorry, Pop. I came to ask what Jeff wanted to drink. I didn’t want him to have to yell.”
“Do we have the lemon-lime Gatorade?” Jeff asked.
“A whole bunch of it.”
“That, please.”
“Thanks, sweetie,” Brandon added, when she left to get it. Once she was back in the kitchen, he dropped his voice. “I’m going to get you one of the new pills, and you’re going to take it.” The doctor had written the new prescription for Jeff at the appointment after Brandon had told him about Jeff’s mood swings in relation to pain.
Jeff hadn’t wanted the prescription.
Brandon had overruled him.
“I don’t want to take Xanax.”
“It’s only for a little while, and it’s a very mild dose. Just to help take the edge off until you’re feeling better. The doctor said it’d help you. Remember what he said? You’re caught in a stress cycle, and it’s making your pain worse. Once you feel better, you can stop taking them.”
Stuart returned with Jeff’s plate on a plastic tray. Mac and cheese, very tender pork tenderloin, and green beans. Not a lot of any of it, just a few bites of each.
Grace brought him a tall glass of Gatorade with a straw. While Stuart swapped places with Brandon, Jeff took a few sips of the Gatorade.
Then Brandon reappeared with the pill and a cup of water.
Sighing, Jeff took them from him and swallowed the pill.
“What’s that?” Stuart asked.
“I’ll tell you later,” Brandon said.
* * * *
Yeah, Brandon got it. Jeff felt horrible and was hating on himself and life in general at that point.
And it sucked and wasn’t fair. Not a bit.
Brandon had already talked to Doyle, a friend of theirs from the Suncoast Society group who also happened to be a psychologist, and might be setting Jeff up with an appointment to talk to him in the next week or so if Jeff’s mood didn’t improve. That morning, Brandon had made several appointments with Cherise for Jeff, his next on Friday, early evening. Brandon would take him after he got off work.
When the doctor had suggested the Xanax, at least temporarily, Brandon knew Jeff needed it. Brandon had done research, too, and it was common for people with chronic health issues to experience depression, or anxiety.
Once Jeff’s body climbed out of this flare, he likely wouldn’t need the Xanax. But for the next few days, at the very least, Brandon was going to insist Jeff take it. If nothing else, to give his body a temporary respite from the mental stress.
Brandon went and grabbed his own plate, which Stuart had dished out for him, and brought it and his glass of iced tea out to the sofa to eat with Jeff. No, he couldn’t imagine what Jeff felt like on a daily basis, but it killed him he couldn’t do more for his guy to help him feel better.
But he would always do what was best for Jeff. Sometimes, like having to make decisions as a father for Emma, that might mean making unpopular decisions.
They still had to be made.
