Page 18 of Good Friends
Gavin’s blue eyes, his sun-bleached brown hair.
His adorable smile.
The truth was, he did love Gavin.
Wasinlove with him.
Deep in his soul, Porter felt certain that by not asking,pushingGavin to stay, he’d somehow…doomedthem.
He didn’t even knowwhy, and that was the most frustrating part of this whole goddamned mess.
Yeah, fuck this shit.Between dodging Jayce and now this? Maybe they were signs for him to make a change after all.
He grabbed his keys, wallet, and phone, and headed out to his truck.
Chapter Six
Gavin lay on his sofa and stared up at the ceiling.
Why does this hurt so bad?
He’d thought getting a little bit of closure like that would help him.
Not so much, it turns out.
He’d fallen asleep again and awoke to find twilight settling around the apartment. He still wasn’t used to the noises here, the rhythm of the place. He’d spent the last year living in a hotel room with a mini fridge and microwave, but it’d been worth it for the pay. His savings account was fatter than ever, and he’d actually started a 401k for retirement, something he’d never had before.
So why does everything feel fucked up worse than ever?
He’d played Porter’s voice mail and the guy sure as fuck didn’t sound like a liar who’d played him.
Good liars never do, though. Never forget that. You forgot that once.
He’d also started sobbing again at Porter’sI love you.
The problem was, he loved Porter, too. This would be a hell of a lot easier if hedidn’tlove the damn guy. If his anger could outweigh the goddamned love he felt for the man.
Then he could walk away from him without a care in the world.
Or, at least without feeling like a chunk of his heart and soul had been forcibly ripped from his body and left behind.
Fucking Jayce.
He always knew Jayce was jealous of him over Porter. The guy had frequently hinted around at wanting an in with Porter as a play partner, but Gavinneverdreamed Porter would ever do something like run around behind his back. Fuck, the guy had never slept with anyone else while he and Dane were together, for fuck’s sake. He’d never seen Porter lie to anyone before. And now…this?
He still wasn’t sure which part of the equation hurt worse, that Porter had lied to him, or that it was fuckingJaycehe was lying to him about. He’dtrustedPorter.
He knew Jayce could be skeezy, but at least he felt reasonably sure the guy was being honest. If anything, Jayce would hide a relationship if he knew he was the side piece, not flaunt it. The fucker hated confrontations. That had always been his MO, for as long as Gavin knew him. He only flaunted something he was proud of snagging.
Well, I hope Porter’s happy with him.
The sad part?
He genuinely wished Porter happiness, because that was all he ever wanted for the man. Porter had spent so many years in such deep pain and Gavin now realized it was clearly obvious he had not been the balm Porter’s soul needed.
Maybe this was for the best after all.
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