Page 9 of Broken Bonds
“Yeah. Camping. Regular place.” Which wasn’t outside the norm for me. One of the few activities I regularly did starting in my teens was going camping. Usually shifted and without gear, but my father approved of it even though my real reason was to get the fuck away from him. In his eyes, it was something “real” men did, get in touch with their shifter side, even though I’m certain he hadn’t done that during my lifetime.
“Need to clear my head. Before… everything,” I added.
She nodded. “Don’t leave yet. Let me go put these down.”
“Okay.”
Part of me worried she might call Dad, but less than a minute later she returned, and that’s when she pressed the wad of bills into my hand before hugging me tightly.
Like she knew.
“I love you,” she whispered, barely a breath, definitely no way the outside cameras could pick it up on their feeds. “Look at the moon and know I love you.” That was something she said to me every time I left on a camping trip. A special thing she only said with me. “Please, stay safe.” Her breath hitched, “Don’t look back.”
A prickle of tears stung my eyes. “Me, too. Love you, Mom. I’ll be gone no more than four days.”
“Okay.”
I offer a smile I’m sure didn’t fool her and in a normal voice say, “If he asks, tell Dad that Lana and I will start planning the wedding when I get back. Have it in four weeks. I just…” I force a smile. “I know when I’m beat. I’ll keep my head down and suck it up. He’ll always win. It’s pointless to fight. I’m too tired and scared to fight anymore.”
At least that last sentence is true.
She nodded again, knowing damned well I’m lying because the tears welling in her eyes were a goodbye.
At least she can honestly say that’s what I told her.
Because I don’t know if Dad can compel her to tell him the truth since they never had a mate bond. Theirs was an arranged marriage.
I can’t risk it. If he can do that to her I want her able to tell him what he’ll think she believes is the truth, because I don’t want him hurting her more than he already does in the normal course of events.
That made sense, right?
I also don’t want him thinking she’s complicit in my departure.
Just before I pull out of the garage I call Lana—who I know is equally unhappy about this development—and tell her I’m going camping for a few days. Again, this isn’t unusual behavior for me, and she knows it.
“He’s going to ask me where,” she says. “I can’t lie to him. I’m terrified of him, Mal. I’m sorry.”
“You’re not the only one. I’m going camping, usual place. I told Mom. She just got home as I was getting ready to leave.”
I know Lana just well enough to recognize she sounds doubtful but wants to believe me to make her life easier. “Okay.”
“I also told Mom when I get back we can start planning this bullshit.” I snort. “Do it in four weeks.”
“Then what?” she asks.
I feel bad for her because she’ll soon end up married off to someone else, probably against her will, once I’m not around. And then she won’t get her free college education, either.
“I guess we’ll figure out where you’ll go to school and then get an apartment there.” I snort. “Any chance you can go to school in Washington State or Alaska?”
She laughs a little. Again, I hate myself for getting her hopes up like this, that we could have at least this illusion of freedom while testing the strength of a very long leash. “I can try. I haven’t filled out applications yet.”
“The Pacific Northwest has lots of great forests to run through.”
“True.”
“I have some ideas. For the wedding. I picked up a few magazines. Nothing huge, right? Please tell me simple’s fine.”
“Thank the Goddess,” she says. “I hate that kind of stuff. I want it small and simple, preferably outside. I’m sure your father won’t let us get away with eloping, or having it in the backyard, but let’s keep the guest list as slim as we can, okay?”
