Page 56 of Scars of a Passionate Revenge
Suddenly, the door flew open again and Smith stood there, his face red. “My Lord, she has gone!” he panted. “The baroness has run down the stairs and out of the door and fled, before anyone could catch her!”
“Good heavens,” the baron said. “We must call the Sheriff now, and send the men after her too!”
Smith nodded. “Leave it to me, My Lord,” he replied, then withdrew.
The room was quiet now, with Benedict, Cecil and the baron all standing looking at Alice.
“I cannot bear it!” she cried. “Please, let me be alone.” She fled from the room and along the corridor into the garden. Her mind was in turmoil, and she knew that just for a moment at least, she needed to be alone.
She walked across the grass and settled on her favorite bench, her thoughts flying around her mind. She did not know how she could forgive him for what he had done, even though her heart longed to believe that what he said was true. But the words he had written had been so cruel, so terrible. How could she ever trust him again?
She closed her eyes and rested her head in her hands, taking deep breaths to try and stop the tears from falling.
After a while she heard footsteps approaching. In the moment before she looked up and opened her eyes, she did not know if she was hoping to see Benedict coming towards her or not, but when she did finally look to see who was coming near, she saw Cecil.
“Alice, might I sit with you for a while?” he asked gently.
She nodded.
“I know you are angry with him, and no one could blame you for that,” Cecil said. “But please let me tell you something. I have known Benedict for a long time. I have watched him claw his way up in society, from nothing, to the powerful position that he holds now. He has not had an easy life, and he has carried anger and resentment with him for a long time. When he met you, he was torn. He knew he was falling in love with you, but he also firmly believed that your father had betrayed his. He did not know what to do.”
“So he betrayed me, instead,” Alice said bitterly.
“I do not believe that he would have gone through with it,” Cecil said. “He says that he did not leave the letter behind on purpose. I believe that he would never have sent it, not once he realized the truth.”
“But he was happy to ruin me, if the truth was as he suspected?” Alice demanded. She could not make sense of any of it. Was she supposed to forgive him, for being prepared to make her the subject of scandal?
Cecil shook his head. “I do not think he would have done it, either way. Alice, he is in love with you. He has had a difficult life, and he struggles to manage his feelings, but I am sure that he loves you, and that he will make you a good husband.”
She sighed. “I do not know what to do.”
“Alice,” another voice interjected, and she looked up to see her father approaching. “The Sheriff and his men have given chase, and I am sure that they will catch up with Dorothea and arrest her. So she will bother us no more.”
Alice smiled. “Well that at least is a relief. I shall be glad if I never set eyes on her again.”
The baron sat down next to her on the bench. “Now, what are we going to do about you and Benedict?”
She shrugged. “Everyone seems to think I should just forgive him, but how can I, after what he has done?”
The baron sighed. “I think it is hard for you and me to imagine the hardship he has suffered,” he said softly. “We have never been hungry, and never really had to work very hard. And so much was taken from him when his father was forced to leave the estate, due to Dorothea’s scheming. I do not blame him for being angry with me and wanting revenge.” He paused and took her hand. “He is a wreck, Alice. He is pacing up and down in the drawing room, like a man haunted.”
“I am not,” another voice interjected, and there was Benedict, too, standing next to the bench.
“Can I not be left alone for one moment?” Alice protested.
“Alice, please, come with me, just for a moment.”
She sighed. “Very well, but I do not think you are going to be able to say anything to change my mind.”
She followed him a little further into the garden, and they stood together under a tree.
“Alice, please, I am begging you to believe me,” he said, his eyes fixed on her with a desperate gaze. “I am in love with you. I believe I have been from the moment we first met again, out there in the gardens at that first ball. But when I learned who you were, I was in turmoil. I did not want to hurt you, but I also could not betray my father’s memory. I felt that I would be letting him down if I did not avenge what had happened to him.”
“So you used me,” Alice said flatly. “You used me as a pawn in your plans. Nothing more. Why should I even believe that you love me? You have done nothing but lie to me, for weeks.”
Benedict let out a ragged sigh and ran a hand through his hair. “I would never have sent the letter. I wrote it in anger. The words were terrible. I am so ashamed. Please, Alice, forgive me.” He dropped down on his knees in front of her. “I will do anything. Please.”
She turned away, finding that she could not bear to look at him, it made her heart hurt too much.
