Page 55 of A Governess' Forbidden Flame
The horses came to a halt, and Frederick seized this moment to start a conversation, which made Sebastian immediately think that this was the exact reason behind this morning’s hunting expedition.
“Sebastian,” Frederick started, holding the reins to his horse tightly, just in case the hounds noticed something, when he would immediately urge the horse to follow them, “there is something I wanted to ask you.”
Sebastian turned to him.Here it is,he thought to himself. The real reason why he and his sister had appeared unexpectedly in front of his door. It wasn’t because of Anna, although that was a good cover story. He had to give them that much.
“What is it?” Sebastian asked, turning to face him.
Then, Frederick’s inquiry cut through the crisp air.
“I wanted to ask you about your governess,” Frederick began, his tone earnest yet tentative.
“Miss Wycliffe?” Sebastian echoed her name.
“Yes.” Frederick nodded, obviously in awe of the woman, although Sebastian did not need to be told this. He had noticed it himself. “I find her to be a remarkable young lady, and I must admit, I’ve been considering the prospect of courting her.” Frederick cleared his throat, only to add. “But that is, of course, only if there is no closeness between you and Miss Wycliffe.”
Sebastian was momentarily caught off guard by this comment. He squeezed the reigns until his fingers had turned completely white, devoid of any blood in them. All the while, he regarded his cousin with a measured expression. He knew why Frederick had asked this. After all, Amelia was a beautiful young woman. Any man would be a fool not to consider her stunning, both physically as well as intellectually.
The weight of societal expectations and the rigid stratification of norms he had to live by bore down on him like the heaviest of burdens. He couldn’t reveal how he truly felt about Amelia. He didn’t think anyone would understand, apart from perhaps Anna. As the Earl of Ravenscroft, he was bound by certain conventions, including the unspoken yet very clear rules governing his choice of a life partner.
“Miss Wycliffe is a woman of grace and virtue,” Sebastian responded, choosing to ignore the question of his own affectionand closeness for the woman. “So, your admiration for her is understandable.”
Frederick refused to let it go. “I am well aware of the constraints that society imposes on our choices, especially the choices of people of your status. After all, you are an earl, and she is just a governess. Even if you wished for her to become your wife, I do not see how that would be possible.”
It was obvious that Frederick had stated this more in a playful manner than seriously, but Sebastian felt that pang of anguish, nonetheless.
“I have no plans of marrying,” Sebastian finally managed to muster as his gaze shifted to their surroundings, his mind grappling with the conflict between duty and the desire for personal fulfillment. The notion of Amelia finding happiness with anyone other than him weighed heavily on him, yet he recognized the limitations imposed by his station.
“Oh, but you should marry, old boy,” Frederick teased in an overly familiar manner, which Sebastian did not care for. “I am simply hoping that you did not choose Miss Wycliffe for that position. You see, unlike you, I do not have a title. I would be able to marry her at a moment’s notice if she allowed me to because I understand the intricacies of societal expectations. I know what I am able to do, and what I cannot.
And…I know I have known her only for a few days, but I believe I care deeply about her, and my affections only grow with each passing day. If there is a chance of happiness between us, I would like to seek your blessing.”
Sebastian knew that he was expected to give a response. His blessing was out of the question. However, he could not very well deny his cousin’s request. He had no basis for it.
“Frederick, I appreciate your honesty and the sincerity in your intentions,” Sebastian finally spoke, trying to come up with any reason that would buy him some time. “There would be a lot of challenges in this particular scenario. For instance, Miss Wycliffe is a governess. She is expected to live with the family she works for. If it is not us, then it will be someone else because she is very passionate about her work, and I doubt that she would cease to do it simply because she has gotten married.”
Sebastian exhaled with relief. He almost smiled, but that would have been too revealing. Instead, he silently patted himself on the back for this clever comeback.
“Yes.” Frederick nodded pensively. “Shedoesseem to be rather passionate about her job. I do not know if she would agree to focus on her own family instead, once she is married.”
Sebastian shrugged. “She is a young woman. She might want to work a little more before settling down.”
Frederick thought about it some more. “I do not have a title, but I would be able to provide a good life for her so she wouldn’t have to work.”
“It is not a question of having to,” Sebastian reminded him. “But rather a question of wanting to. Just…consider the challenges carefully before proceeding.”
Still, Frederick did not seem to be so easily dissuaded. “I shall think about it, but I believe my mind is made up. I have never met a woman quite like her.”
Sebastian had to admit silently that neither had he. That was why he had been so smitten with her, so utterly lost without her. Now, another threat had emerged, a threat he thought he would not be facing so far away from civilization. Yet, it seemed that civilization tried to worm its way into their world, into their life here at Ravenscroft Manor, threatening to undo everything.
At that moment, the hounds started rushing toward the bushes, and the horses responded immediately. Frederick glanced at Sebastian, his grin wide and challenging.
“It would seem the hunt is on, old boy!” he shouted, rushing in first.
Sebastian’s horse seemed to wake up a moment later, lunging after them. Sebastian was left wondering who it was they were hunting: a fox or Amelia.
Chapter 28
Amelia was surprised not to see either Sebastian or his cousin Frederick at breakfast that morning. Vivienne had cheerfully informed her that the two had gone off hunting and would be returning shortly.
