Page 17 of Six
“All that I am is already yours, but I’ll marry you, you caveman.”
Raph’s slow smile is kind of terrifying. He yanks Michael’s head forward for a quick but very dirty kiss, and then opens the black box and slides a white gold band with a row of rubies on Michael’s finger. I get a quick glimpse of Michael’s watery blue eyes before he attacks Raph’s mouth.
“That was a very unique love declaration.” Gabe sounds bored, but there’s a hint of a smile on his face.
Sari is not trying to hide his beaming one. Tears of joy are falling down his cheeks while Uri is staring at him with an unreadable emotion on his face. Meg and Linda are cheering. They stand and go to hug the happy couple while the rest of us remain seated. We aren’t really the touchy-feely kind. Apart from Sari, who’s talking excitedly with Michael and admiring the unusual engagement ring.
I can’t keep my eyes off of them. Michael and Raph look so complete together. Amid the unfair and puzzling chaos of life, and after all they went through, they’ve found one another. I don’t know what I’m feeling exactly. I’m thrilled for them, but I’m also even more aware of the huge void inside of me. Is it loneliness? Can I still feel lonely while I’m surrounded by my noisy, larger-than-life family?
Rami’s gagging sound yanks my attention to him. “I need to throw up, but my stomach doesn’t have enough substance. Can I have a stick of bread with a sprinkle of arsenic? A glass of pesticide? Shards of glass would work, as well,” he grumbles.
“Stop being such a baby raccoon, and be happy for your brothers!” Linda scolds him.
“Can we keep the sickening kisses to a bare minimum at the table, though?” Uri huffs, pulling Sari down on the chair next to him again. Michael and Raph don’t seem to hear him and keep going at it.
“Just do a Yentl, and pretend it never happened,” Gabe suggests while tapping quickly on his phone.
“A what?” Sari asks, looking all cute and confused. His pale blue eyes are framed by grey squared glasses, and his black hair is long past his shoulders now, tied in a braid. At times, his delicate features and graceful movements make him look very feminine.
Ferdinand arrives, pushing a cart with several cakes on it. Meg passed her sweet tooth on to us. Many of my childhood memories involve us sitting around this table eating pies.
“Great! Thank you, Ferd…” Meg’s sentence breaks into a coughing fit that makes Michael rapidly jump off Raph’s lap and move around the table to reach her, slapping her back lightly. Gabe tells Ferdinand to bring some tea with honey, and I pour fresh water in her glass. Linda hands Meg the glass; her gaze is on her wife, looking as deeply worried as the rest of us.
Meg has lupus, a condition that makes her immune system attack its own tissue. The attacks can be widespread, affecting not only skin but also blood, cells, and organs. It needs to be monitored regularly. And although she’s reassured us that her condition hasn’t worsened, she doesn’t look like herself.
“I’m fine.” Meg’s voice sounds raspy. She drinks some water and reassuringly squeezes Linda’s hand on the table while looking at her.
“Did you see Dr. Sallinger recently?” Michael asks, walking back to Raph. Dr. Sallinger is an immune pathologist at the Grand View, the same hospital where Michael works.
“I did. It’s just this cold weather that dries out my throat,” Meg explains. When Ferdinand places the cup of hot tea infusion on the table, she smiles up at him. “Please, we need to celebrate.”
When nobody moves, she adds, “Two of my kids just got engaged, stop the long faces and show me some smiles.”
Ferdinand is the first to act, placing the desserts on the table. Even though still concerned about Meg, nobody can resist good cakes. Sari and Linda start handing chocolate and apple-nut slices topped with whipped cream around the table.
I hum around a forkful of double chocolate cake while I stare at Meg sipping some of her tea. She’s serenely listening to Linda, Michael, and Sari talk about wedding stuff.
Am I worrying for nothing? I can’t turn it off. I owe my mothers and my brothers everything. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for this family—or maybe I would but in a very twisted, screwed up way. I’d do anything for them. Anything—we are past the where-should-I-bury-the-body favor, obviously, but everything else is game.
“What’s with you? Your lemon-sucking frown usually gives way to a teeny-tiny smile when there’s cake involved.” Rami is studying me, leaning forward from the other side of the table. He’s the only one not eating.
I grunt, hoping it’s enough of a response for my brother. He’s used to my lack of communication skills. Not that I don’t know how to express myself, but I don’t need to interject my opinion into every conversation. Growing up, my mouth landed me in trouble with my addict mother and then later with the sick scientists who experimented on me. I learned fast that it was better to keep quiet and let people think I’m the silent type. Which is ironic, given that I’m a swirling vortex of furious energy. I just learned to control it and hide it most of the time, channel it into fucking and killing.
“Is your broodiness perhaps caused by a certain fearless, sexy twunk with red lips and a sassy attitude?”
“No.” My quick and too-loud denial attracts Uri and Gabe’s attention. But I really wasn’t thinking about Oliver…not this time.
“Uh-huh.” Rami clearly sees through my agitated answer, continuing to stare at me, probably hoping the weight of his eyes will make me crack. I won’t say a word, though. Don’t want to share what I did with them. I fucked Oliver’s mouth, and I can’t stop wanting it again.
Rami’s hazel gaze is starting to itch at my skin, but I ignore it.
Uri shifts in his seat. “I can get you inside Madame Claudette’s if you need somerelaxingtime.” That’s the BDSM club Uri likes to go to.
“Not my scene. I can get what I need from the escort agency,” I reply gruffly. But do I?
I certainly did when Oliver took my cock like a champ. The feel of his hair between my fingers, the way his throat squeezed me, the moans that left his lips, the challenge and want in his beautiful eyes. Perfection.
His careless attitude and the fact that he refused to back down had my blood boiling and my instincts screaming to take what I wanted from him. And I did.
