Page 19 of Happy Krampus Xmas & the Meet Not Cute
“And you aren’t mad as a box of frogs?” He snorts. “I’m afraid to ask you about the sacrifice. Are you going toFatal Attractionyour hen?”
“Ahhhh!” I suddenly scream, grabbing my chest as I simultaneously get the attention of the whole café. “A bomb just exploded inside me,” I gasp.
“Hope it was an orgasmic explosion.” Spencer rolls his eyes. Fuck, I thought my performance was brilliant, but he doesn’t seem to be taken by my act. He didn’t worry even for a second about me.
“How dare you question my love for her! I’d never hurt a feather on Wednesday’s fluffy black and white head,” I snarl. But he’s not even looking at me. No, he’s once again trying not to get caught as he tosses another look toward a certain table.
“You’re overly dramatic,” he adds after a couple of seconds.
“Side-eye alert! Why are the protein-pumped blokes sitting at that table glaring at you?” I ask him with nonchalance.
His head snaps toward me. “Mm,” he lets out a very equivocal hum. But I notice the faint red painting his cheeks.
“What the fuck happened? The brown-eyed Thor looks particularly taken by you.” But not in an angry way, he seems more guilty? Annoyed? “Did you graze his hettie dick or something?”
“Or something,” he mumbles.
“What the fuck, Spencer? You know very well I want all the juicy details of your college life!” I scold him.
“This is hardly that.” He shakes his head.
“I’ll be the mighty judge of that. Spill!”
“You know I started the part-time job as a janitor a month ago.”
“Yeah. Even though I told you I’d give you the extra money.” He’s so fucking stubborn, but I’m so in awe of him. He’s twenty years old, but he’s more self-determined and purposeful than most of the thirty- and forty-year-old people I meet every day. He’s the epitome of resolution.
“Fuck that. You and Gabe already do so much.”
I let it go…for now. Only because I admire his strong-willed personality. “Tell me what happened.”
“I was cleaning the showers in the football locker room, and I sprayed some cleaner on the floor. Then you called, and I…” He sighs, running a hand in his hair. “Look, it’s fine. Nothing happened.”
“You can’t stop there. I need more!” I whine. “I remember calling you. I told you about meeting you today, and we hung up. What happened afterward? Did Thor find you with your arse up and couldn’t resist the temptation? Did he catch you using the cleaner as lube as you oiled your tool?Flashdanceyour way through the shower butt naked?”
“No! Your mind is fucking sick, Lori.”
“I prefer the word mystical,” I retort, sniffing all my outrage. “Am I close, though? Come on give me a hint, a Lilliputian, minikin one. I bet his abs look like sections of a Hershey bar.”
I witness the confirmation in his darkening hazel eyes. Blimey! Something definitely happened.
“Please, let’s forget about it.”
“But I can’t. Not with the hatred floating toward us from their table.” I wiggle my fingers at the group, which only increases the glaring looks.Homophobic much?“Do you need me to rearrange their faces? I’d do it gladly.”
“I can do that myself.” Astreet boyagainst a group of jocks? I'd bet on him every single time. Spencer is fucking hard core. Also, I might have taught him some new moves.
“Thor seems very interested in you—in a serial killer kind of way. He’s leering at you…with contempt or desire? I can’t seem to grasp it.” I wink at the bloke near Thor. He could be the face of a steroid commercial—his muscles have muscles.
“Aha!” Spencer exclaims incredulously, his eyes firmly on me. Too firmly, almost like he’s forcing himself not to glance to Thor’s table again.
“It’s definitely contempt. Let it go. He’s nobody.”
“A nobody who got you fired?” I raise a questioning eyebrow at him.
“How do you know?”
“You’re looking for another job here, so…elementary, Watson,” I say, feeling all smug and shit.
