Page 54 of If You Were Mine
“Yes. I was a virgin.” She took a sip of her coffee, her gaze right on mine.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw she had begun working on biscuits, flour spilling over the cutting board, with a bowl filled with whatever ingredients she’d found in my kitchen that I rarely used.
“You didn’t tell me.”
She shrugged again, before going back to the biscuits and not looking at me.
“Virginity is a construct. Yes, you are the first person that I’ve slept with. I wasn’t waiting on anyone. It just happened that way. But you sure as hell weren’t my first orgasm. Or the first person I’ve ever had any sexual contact with. You were just the first person to enter my vagina.”
I blinked at her, laughter threatening. It was getting far more difficult than it should be for me not to fall for this woman.
“It makes me a fucking monster. It may be a construct, but it wasn’t mine to take.”
“You didn’t take anything. And I didn’t give you anything. Other than an orgasm.” She winked over her shoulder, and I chuckled. I couldn’t help it. This woman. She was just too much.
But then she always had been.
“Seriously, I am a damn monster.”
“No you’re not.”
“It makes me feel like one because right now all I can think about is the fact that I fucked you and claimed you and I’m the only one who has. I’m the only one that’s been in that tight pussy of yours. And how fucked up is that?”
Her eyes widened, before she painstakingly and methodically went to the sink to wash her hands.
“Oh? Is that what you’re thinking about right now?”
“Damn straight.”
“So, you have been the only one there. Is that going to be a problem for you?”
“It should be. But we both know it isn’t.”
“So what are you going to do about it?” she asked.
“What do you want me to do about it, Wellesley? Because we both know I want to do this again. That you want this again.”
“Oh? You think I want this again?”
I looked down at her, at her parted mouth, her wide eyes.
“Of course you fucking want this again. But that doesn’t mean it should happen.”
“Because you don’t want it? Or you think I shouldn’t want it.”
“I’m only going to hurt you,” I said point-blank, thinking of Joshua’s words.
“Then don’t hurt me. It’s not a full-on promise that you will. Just try not to be an asshole.”
“Baby, I am an asshole.”
“Okay, try not to be the asshole that breaks my heart.”
I set down my coffee cup and sighed.
“I don’t promise forevers, Wellesley.”
“I wasn’t aware I asked you for them.”
