Page 67 of The Sailor in Polynesia
“Come on, you know Mom attendsanythingher kids or grandkids do. Remember when she flew to attend Tyrell’s kindergarten graduation and we all had to sit down and tell her she could not fly around for every little thing?”
The family members who were in the living room took up every available seat. Kids were nudging one another and wrestling around on the floor, Miranda sat in Doug’s lap, and my brothers congregated near the kitchen.
“Okay, everyone, hush. Let’s watch Mia’s episode.”
Mom hit play and I watched the video roll. The stunning views of my boat in Kauehi made me homesick to be out wandering again. I pictured her lonely in her slip, but then shook myself. She had Jonas to look after her.
The last shot was the dronie of Jonas and me waving and the drone zooming out. I kept the speed in real time for about four seconds before it soared out and faded to black.
“Jesus, Mia, that was beautiful. No wonder you wanted to go back to the boat.”
“That looked like a dream vacation.”
“Who was the guy at the end?”
James turned to me. “Yeah, Mia, whowasthe guy at the end?” When I stuck my tongue out at James, he laughed and turned back to the TV, picking up the remote.
“Jonas is afriend.”
James coughed out, “Phone sex,” and I felt my face heat up. I kicked his shin.
“No violence in front of the kids,” Miranda called out, which of course made the kids all turn to look at me.
I sat on the arm of the couch next to James and pressed my shoulder to his. “Violence is bad, kids. And don’t do drugs.” I reached under James’s arm and pinched his ribs.
James yelped and swatted my hand away. But it was Ike who interrupted us.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Mia, when did you upload this video?”
“Yesterday, why?”
He pointed at the screen. “It’s got over a hundred thousand views. And hundreds of comments. Holy shit.”
“Ike!”
“Shiitake! Holy shiitake!”
James gave me a lopsided grin. “I guess Ike hasn’t been keeping up with your videos, Mia.”
“Yeah, Uncle Ike,” Tyrell chimed in. “Aunt Mia is kind of a big deal.”
Ringing endorsement from a teenager.
“Wait a minute.” James narrowed his eyes. I looked at the screen and saw him scrolling through the comments section.
“James, don’t go there.”
“What the hell are these”—I elbowed him—“fudgepuckers thinking, saying sh... shih tzus like this!”
“That’s why you don’t read the comments section. At a certain point it gets too bad.”
“I mean, at least they’re not saying mean things about Mia?” Erica said.
“No, they’re just a bunch of regular internet morons.” James gritted his teeth.
“Okay, that’s enough. Who wants to go for a ride in Uncle James’s sports car?”
I left the room laughing, with a bunch of kids clamoring to get James to pick them first.
