Page 80 of A Chance at Redemption for the Alpha
“Thank you for being honest,” she says in return. “Because you are one of the first who was ever fully real with me.” She looks down at her glass. “I am not here because I am a victim. I was the pack whore.”
“Lori,” I say carefully. “I know it’s-“
“I know what you are going to say,” she butts in. “That I was coerced, that I was a victim, and all that stuff, but I don’t feel like a victim.”
Maybe it’s her way of dealing with what happened. Maybe not seeing herself as a victim is what’s helping her at the moment. I do think she will need to face the truth eventually to fully heal, but I am not going to force her. “You don’t have to tell me anything,” I assure her.
“But you just told me everything,” she says. “I… it would feel wrong.”
“I told you of my own free will, I was ready to talk about it,” I say. “I wasn’t able to do that for a long time, but I am now. You didn’t force me to tell you. And I won’t force you, either. You tell me what you want, whenever you want.”
I can make out movement in the darkness, and am surprised when I suddenly feel Lori hugging me. It only lasts seconds, but it still makes my heart skip a beat.
“Sorry,” she says, her voice sounding strained like she is holding back tears. “I am sorry for hugging you so suddenly. I just… You are so sweet. You know, my last mate pretended to like me, then he made sure to instantly fuck me. He made promises. There were a lot of red flags, and I was so stupid I ignored them.”
“That’s not stupid,” I say quietly. “He was your mate. Of course, you wanted to believe in him.”
“He used me,” she says bitterly. “For his revenge against my former alpha’s son, and then he dropped me. Rejected me for being a slut and a worthless human.”
“Can we put a rule up?” I ask. “Or more like a deal.”
She seems to be surprised. “What do you have in mind?”
“I won’t ever rush you or pressure you into talking, that’s a promise. On the other hand, you promise you won’t use any derogatory terms when talking about yourself.” I feel my heartbeat picking up, not sure if I’m overstepping. I don’t want to scare her away by sounding overbearing or patronizing. I just feel like everyone around her called her all kinds of names, so she believes they’re true. “Feel free to use them for your asshole former mate or for that sorry excuse of an alpha’s son, instead.”
Lori smiles slightly. “You are really something, Benji.”
“So, we have a deal?”
“Alright, but only if you stop belittling your own achievements. I’ve realized you have a tendency to make yourself look less than you are, and I’ve only known you for a day.”
“Wait a moment,” I complain. “Why did you have to turn it around?”
“It’s only fair, isn’t it? I have to warn you, though, I have a competitive streak.”
I grin. “I kind of want to learn more about that.”
“So, deal?”
“Deal!”
“Okay, so how about we join the welcome party now?” I offer. “It’s being held to welcome all new pack members. Completely relaxed, don’t worry. But Silas made a monstrosity of a dessert. You don’t want to miss out on that one.”
Lori looks torn, but much to my surprise, she suddenly nods. “Let’s go.”
When we walk towards the pack house, I feel that, while I might not have won her over as my mate yet, it’s possible that I have a new friend. I have never dated anyone, and my last mate ended in a complete failure. The only interaction I’ve had with a girl was when I went clubbing with Nova and her friends. I just hope I won’t do anything to upset Lori.
twenty-eight
Hot Stuff
*LORI*
Goddess, what am I doing? What the fuck am I doing here? It’s not even two days since I officially joined the pack and met my mate, and I am already getting way too attached, not only to this place but to Benjamin, too.
I watch how he carries some planks to the back of my cottage, where I want to redo the little shed. He is so strong, his muscles flexing under the weight he is carrying. He has taken off his shirt, because it’s hot and pearls of sweat are on his chest, making him look even more gorgeous.
He looks like he would be able to bury me in his arms, and I could feel protected. I can’t help but compare him to my ex-mate. Paul looked strong, too, but he didn’t have Benji’s kindeyes, and heneverwent out of his way to help me. When he did something for me, he always expected me to return the favor. Benji helps and then just leaves, without expecting anything in return.
