Page 74 of The Princess of Nothing
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Ithrashed around inmy bed, kicking the blankets to the floor, as the cage from my nightmares pulled me deeper into the dream. My blistering skin begged for relief as the sun beat down on me, blinding me. When I opened my eyes again, the redthorn viper slithered in, puffing out a regal hood and spitting venom as it sank its fangs into my skin. The putrid stench of vomit and urine pinched my nostrils, making me gag. Blisters burned my sore skin. My parched tongue begged for even a drop of water.
Then, something else woke me. A calling. I awoke in a puddle of sweat, my hair stuck around my forehead and on my chest. My chest heaved, and I pinched my eyes shut. Calming my racing pulse, I swallowed thickly. I could still feel the echo of pain coursing through me, the pull that had dragged me gratefully from my sleep. I climbed out of the bed, and my feet hit the cold stone ground. I shivered as I wrapped a blanket around my shoulders.
My feet carried me in a hazy state until I reached a desolate corridor with a large arched window overlooking the snowy trees and matte-black night. Blaise stared out of it, with his elbows pressed against the stone ledge and his face in his hands. Sobs escaped through his fingers; his body wrenched back when I touched him.
He flinched, turning to face me. “What are you doing here?” He was as white as fog, his eyes bloodshot, the skin underneath sunken. “You need to leave.”
A lump formed in my throat. “I just knew you were here somehow. I couldn’t sleep either.”
“Then go have a maid bring you some herbal tea.”
The panic in my heart wouldn’t subside. “It’s more than that,” I said, trembling when I remembered the cage. When I touched him again, his pain pinched through me. “Tell me what’s wrong,” I pleaded. I traced my fingers down his cheek and stopped at his lips. I pulled away, then closed my eyes. He couldn’t even look at me. I couldn’t stand seeing him hurt, no matter what he’d done to me. My anger dissipated when I saw his tortured eyes. “You don’t need to hide your darkness from me.”
“Don’t.” He turned his back toward me, looking out at the starry night. “You shouldn’t have come to me.”
“I had no choice,” I whispered. “And I know I was angry, but you must understand what I’d gone through. We both did things wrong.”
He turned on his heel and looked me dead in the eyes with a calculating stare. He grabbed my wrist and wrenched me close to him. “Don’t you get it?” he asked through his teeth. “You’re making things worse by being here. It’s driving me into madness.”
Tears formed, and I didn’t care if he could see them. “I didn’t have anywhere to go.”
“I know.” He let go of my wrist. “But did you have to bring him with you, to shove your newfound happiness in my face? I have enough going on without watching you play in the snow and kiss in the same spot we did almost a year ago.”
His words crushed my heart. “I’m sorry, okay, but what did you expect? For me to run into your arms? You threatened to have me dethroned. Then your letter asking me to marry someone else for your gain.”
“If you’ve come here to remind me of all the terrible things I’ve done and how I’m so awful, then don’t bother. I’m numb, lost. I don’t know who I am or what I want anymore.”
I squeezed my fingers into his arms, reminding him that this was real and I was here, even if he told himself he didn’t want me to be. “I’m not leaving you like this. I want to help you.”
His gaze flitted, searching mine. It was invasive, as if he were staring into my bare soul. A fierce want pulsated between us. His fingers flexed, then curled. “Don’t do that.”
“What?”
“Look at me like that. With those eyes.”
Our worlds crashed.
His lips were on mine, stealing my next breath. Neither of us wanted to let go. It was wrong. Desperate.
