Page 85 of Save Us
“You smell of James,” Ruby murmurs as I caress her shoulder bone with my lips.
I laugh soundlessly. “I hope that’s a good thing.”
She nods, her hair tickling my chin. “A very good thing.”
I stroke her back, run my hands over her shoulders and down her spine. I lay my hand on the little notch of her coccyx and pull her closer to me, which makes her pant softly. The next moment, she looks up at me again. Her eyes burn into mine. I raise my hand and thrust it into her hair, then I kiss her again. I move my lips against hers, press my tongue into her mouth, enjoy the sigh that escapes her, and let myself go. My body takes control. Itsteers Ruby over to the bed. As she bashes the backs of her knees against it, I pause.
“Is this OK?” I breathe, smoothing her hair off her cheek.
Ruby nods. Her eyes glitter feverishly. “Yes.”
I lean toward her again and run my lips slowly over her cheek, to the corner of her mouth, down her chin, to her throat. I press a kiss against it and feel Ruby’s hands make their way back upward. She grasps my shoulders and holds on tight as I take her skin between my teeth and suck. I can hear her breath catch while she presses herself harder against my body.
“That’s nice,” she whispers.
I take my time. After her neck, I turn my attention to her shoulders and shoulder bones. My lips explore her cleavage and I cup her breasts. I give a gentle squeeze, then my hands stroke down her sides and I cover her belly with kisses. Cautiously, I rest my hand on her jeans and look up at her.
“Is this OK too?” I ask.
Ruby’s eyes literally glow as she nods.
I keep going, undoing the button and then the zip, and then I pull them down over her bottom. Ruby’s wearing black knickers, and the sight of them sets my heart racing. After I’ve liberated her from her jeans, I straighten up again. At once, her hands find my belt. She stands on tiptoe and kisses me, more and more wildly, as she tries to unbuckle it without looking. It takes a few attempts, but eventually my jeans join hers on the floor.
Ruby sinks back into the soft duvet again, and I follow her, not breaking off our kiss. There’s so much I wanted to say to her, but every word has been driven out of my head by the lust that’s steering my body right now. Ruby wraps a leg around my hips and pulls me closer still.
It’s hard to remember why I’d actually wanted to take this slower—my hands roam of their own volition over her body. I touch her everywhere, want to feel her everywhere, explore. I press against her, right between her legs, and the sound she makes nearly drives me out of my mind. She touches me with feverish hands, bites into my lower lip when I do it again.
I put my hands under her shoulders and pull her up slightly, so she’s almost sitting. I kiss her again as I reach behind her and find the clasps of her bra with my fingers. They’re trembling so much that it takes me three goes to undo the clasps. Ruby’s smiling at me as she lets the straps slip down her arms, then she finally pulls the bra off.
For a moment, I just look at her. The sight of her naked skin, her tousled hair, and the vivid expression in her eyes takes my breath right away.
We move at the same time. Ruby lets herself sink back again, and I lean over her and kiss her, my arms resting on the mattress on either side of her. Her tongue plays slowly with mine as her hands wander to my boxers.
She hesitates and mumbles something against my lips. I pull away slightly and look her in the eyes.
“OK?” She repeats my question with a smile. I laugh breathlessly and nod.
Ruby begins tentatively pushing the boxers over my bum. I help a little, and then pull her knickers off too. After that I reach down to fish my wallet from my jeans pocket and find a condom. Ruby watches as I lay it on the bed beside her and then lean over her again.
Her inviting gaze sets my heart beating even faster than it already was. She wraps her arms around my neck, and her lipsfind mine again. I could keep doing this forever—lying naked in this bed with her, kissing her until all thoughts of the past and the future have disappeared and the two of us are all that’s left. If it were up to me, this moment could last forever.
I turn so that I can look into her face. Her eyes are cloudy with desire, but their expression leaves no doubt as to what Ruby would like to do.
And there are no more questions. We move in unison; I roll back onto her and she wraps her legs around me, to pull me to her. I slip so naturally inside her. The sensation overwhelms me, and I have to close my eyes and stop moving, stay in this place and this moment.
When I open my eyes again, I see that Ruby is doing exactly the same. I sink onto my elbows and stroke my fingers over her temples, down her cheeks. She opens her eyes too. And then I slowly start to move. I pull away from her and cautiously thrust in again, without taking my eyes off Ruby’s beautiful face for a second. She moves together with me, slips her hand into my hair and holds me tight.
I’ve never known anything like this in my life before. This thing that we’re doing is linked to unconditional trust. I’m giving Ruby every part of me, and in return, she’s giving me herself.
In the past, sex for me has been all about coming, but this is so much more. With Ruby, there’s no goal in sight. There’s just her and me and the emotions filling me from head to toe.
I don’t have to tell her how much I love her. I’m showing her with my body; with every gentle, deep kiss; with every thrust of my hips; in the way I hold her as her body shakes beneath mine; and I let myself drop away, utterly and completely.
22
Ruby
The time I spent with James in Brightwell-cum-Sotwell stays with me in my thoughts every single day of the following week. And the week after that. And the one after that.
