Page 146 of Reign of Light
His mouth drops to mine, and he kisses me fiercely, crushing himself to me, and devouring me in every way he can. Fire licks up my spine as he rocks into me, the pressure of his hips hitting me just right as his thick cock still slowly slides in and out. But when the building pressure makes my back arch into him, feeling like I’m going to implode, he pulls back, leaving me wanting until our bodies are tangled in a new way and he slides into me once more.
Over and over again, he brings me to the pinnacle of pleasure, loving me like I said I needed. Silent tears trail from the corners of my eyes, and my chest squeezes as he whispers soft words in my ear, promises that I know neither of us should make tonight. He loves me, despite everything inside me that wants to break and mourn the version of me that won’t remember any of this, or the one that will never have it again.
When my limbs are shaking, and my chest heaving, unable to take the onslaught of physical and emotional bliss any longer, my hand wraps around his wrist, squeezing tight until his movements still.
“Weston, please.” My words are almost a whine, and I see a flicker of anguish in his eyes as he slides out of me, before turning me onto my back so our chests press together once more.
I almost feel like I will tip over the edge as his cock thrusts inside me once more, and I gasp at the shock that the contact with my swollen core sends through me. His hands skate up my sides and push my arms above my head, his fingers tickling my skin until they lace between mine. He squeezes my hands tightly, pressing them into the soft mattress above, and his nose strokes down the length of mine.
“Hold on to me.” His chest rumbles with the command, and I nod fiercely, squeezing his hands in mine and pinning my knees to his sides, drawing him even deeper. “Don’t ever let go.”
Our bodies move together, each movement in perfect harmony until we are consumed by moans and cries and whispers. We’re all hands and tongues and hips, as the slow and tender rocking turns into frenzied, burning desire. Pressure and heat build until I don’t think I can hold on any longer, and the voice that is my calm in all the chaos of my world and my mind breaks through the periphery.
“Let it go, Lennox. Come with me, my queen.”
My toes curl and my back arches, pushing my hips harder onto him as I come undone, fueled even harder by the fierce rock of Weston’s cock into me, and the feral roar into the crook of my neck as his hot release spills inside me. Heat blooms in my belly and between my thighs as my limbs collapse, my fingers unable to move from squeezing his hands so tightly. He releases my hands and cups my face, kissing me deeply, clutching me as if I’m going to disappear, before pulling back.
My eyes flutter open when I feel the light brush of his fingertips slide through my hair. His dark teal eyes are hooded as he simply watches me, or the remnants of me after he lit my entire body on fire and made me explode.
“What?” I murmur, and a soft smile plays on his lips.
He stays silent for a moment, his fingers still stroking the edge of my hair, leaving tingling trails on my forehead with every move.
“I always thought that when I left Dawnlin, I wouldn’t ever want to look back. All I would remember is this room, and this ship, and be reminded of how lonely I was despite being surrounded by a group of people I cared for and who cared for me.”
I stay silent, waiting for him to continue, not wanting to interrupt whatever confession he feels he needs to share.
“But now, this room has brought me some of the best memories of my life. Leaving now, I see only you.”
Tears fill my eyes, and I blink rapidly, cursing them when they fall. “I can’t take those away from you.”
His fingers stroke again, his hand shifting farther down so the pad of his thumb rubs across my cheek.
“But I would give them up for you, so that you could keep them. I’d give them up so you could have the future you always wanted.”
I swallow hard, the lump in my throat aching as my voice cracks. “You are the future I wanted, Weston.”
“Then we’ll figure out how to make it happen. I swear it.”
I nod quickly, my eyes never leaving his, but I have to clamp my jaw shut to hide the quivering. He leans forward, pressing a soft kiss to my lips before sliding out of me, and my body already aches with his absence. Settling behind me, he tugs me against his front, wrapping me in his arms so one cages me across my chest. The other hand slides between my thighs, cupping me where I’m still throbbing and dripping from both of our releases, before he lets out a heavy sigh.
I close my eyes and clutch his forearm, nuzzling my head into the bulge of his muscles, when I feel the press of a kiss to the back of my head.
“We’ll come up with a plan tomorrow. Right now, you need to sleep. Everything will be alright, Lennox. I won’t stop until it is.”
I want to believe him, but nothing is ever that simple.
Not when you’re the queen.
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
Soft breaths punctuate the still room as I lie watching Weston sleep peacefully. His lips are parted slightly, and every worry line and tense muscle is smooth and relaxed, making me want to brush my fingertips across them. It’s been hours, and I haven’t been able to close my eyes, or drift to sleep, even after this seemingly endless day of being pushed to exhaustion and consumed by so many emotions.
My thoughts are a chaotic storm, creating every possible scenario, every possible worry, and living through it, dragging me deeper into tumultuous waves of anxiety until I feel like I’m drowning. The only thing that has kept me from falling off the deep end of despair is watching Weston sleep. A ghost of a smile plays at my lips to see him, clearly exhausted from loving me so deeply, after waking multiple times in the night to remind me again and again.
I can’t close my eyes. I need to soak up every second of him before I shatter my heart into unsalvageable pieces, and this man that I have come to cherish over everything else in my life is no longer part of it.
There is no reality where he allows me to let go of my mother, not after spending over twenty years here trying to save her. I can’t find any option where he would allow me to talk him out of it, where we would let her go. Knowing we are both worthy and hold the vials of healing waters in our hands eliminates any chance that he would. He would sacrifice himself for me, the same way he repeatedly did for the Castaways, for my father, for my mother.
