Page 102 of The Happy Hour
Lola nodded. ‘I wanted a proper direction for my music: I wanted to get out in the open with it, get some feedback, and the exhilaration of playing with Spade and Braden – being this weird-ass little trio that gets people watching and clapping along, thousands of views online – it’s really satisfying. Anything else will just be a cherry on top. And none of this would have happened without you.’
‘No, I—’
‘You introduced me to everyone. You let me invade the market, and I know it was uncomfortable for you at the beginning, but youalwaysbacked me up. You’re the very best friend anyone could hope for.’
Jess swallowed. It was unlike Lola to be so sincere, and she wasn’t sure her fragile emotions could take it. ‘Well.’ She cleared her throat. ‘Right back at you, OK? You’ve put up with so much from me over the last few months – the last decade. I don’t know what I’d do without you.’
‘Good,’ Lola said. ‘That means you’re never getting rid of me. Want to put Bryan Adams on and see how long it takes for Malik to notice? We’ll start with “Heat of the Night”, which is his siren song.’
Jess laughed and settled back into the cushions, clutching her mug of tea while Lola got her iPad. For the first time since Tuesday, she felt something close to content, Ash fading temporarily from her thoughts. She’d spend enough time thinking about him when she got home, and, since he was the one who’d walked away, it wasn’t fair of him to monopolise her whole evening.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
When Jess made it to Bexleyheath on Tuesday afternoon, she couldn’t help thinking that it had been a week since Ash had ended it. She had insisted they remain text buddies, but after he’d gone, she’d been too raw to even message to see if he’d got home OK, and after that it had felt too awkward. He hadn’t been in touch either, which spoke volumes. She’d oscillated between angry and resigned, agreeing with what he’d done and thinking it was cowardly, and at all the points in between she found that, more than anything else, she just missed him.
Standing on her parents’ doorstep, she was aware that, despite making an effort with her appearance, her lack of sleep and her seesawing thoughts had taken their toll, and her skin looked pale and slightly crepey. She felt as if she was on day six of a week-long hangover, combined with a bad dose of hay fever, though her sore eyes were from secret crying rather than the pollen count. Even Terence had taken pity on her on Saturday night, and had ordered in a feast from the Thai restaurant down the road. They’d had a Bourne marathon, Jess mortifyingly falling asleep during the third film with her head on his shoulder. She knew things were bad when he didn’t even tease her about it.
‘Jess!’ Graeme opened the door wide, the navy gloss catching the sun and flashing a light beam into her eyes. ‘So lovely to see you. Come here, eh?’ He opened his arms and, after a second’s hesitation, she stepped into them.
‘Hey, Dad.’
He pushed back and looked down at her. ‘Everything OK with the market? With your fella Enzo? Your mum and I have been keeping tabs on all Lola’s TikToks, and the response has been astounding. That girl has such talent!’
‘She’s the best,’ Jess said. ‘And Enzo and Carolina are in a much better place. He seems a lot happier.’
‘Don’t think we didn’t see your designs on full display,’ her mum added, appearing in the hall holding a book, her reading glasses perched high on her head. ‘Why didn’t you tell us Wendy was letting you sell them in the shop?’
‘It was for Enzo,’ Jess said. ‘That was why I came clean about them – or Lola did, actually. But it’s been really good.’ She smiled as she remembered how elated she’d been when Margaret – Peggy – had bought her very first print. But Peggy took her thoughts on a direct route to Ash, and her smile fell.
‘We’re so proud of you for taking the next step,’ Edie said. ‘But I hope you’re not working too hard. There’s clearly been a lot going on.’
‘It’s the same as it’s always been,’ she said. Her defensiveness was a reflex, and she gave herself a silent telling off. ‘Ihavebeen busy, but also... I’ve had a – a thing. Another thing going on.’ She winced at her clumsiness.
‘A thing?’ Graeme laughed gently. ‘You’ll have to be a bit more specific, Jessica.’
‘Come through to the kitchen,’ her mum said. ‘It’s much cosier in there. Tea or coffee, or a glass of wine, now we’re at the four o’clock mark?’
‘Wine would be great.’ Jess followed them into the large kitchen, which had navy walls and a white island with stools positioned around it. This was where her parents had been sitting with Celine when she’d overheard them. She glanced at the clock on the wall. It was, of course, a sunflower, with bold yellow petals and a brown centre, glossy white hands and numbers that made it easy to read.
Edie poured out three glasses of Pinot Grigio, and gestured for Jess to sit on one of the stools, while she hopped up opposite her. Graeme sat at the end of the island, a gentle frown wrinkling his forehead.
‘Tell us about your thing,’ her mum said.
‘My thing,’ Jess repeated.
She sipped her wine, raised her glass in thanks, then stared at the countertop. It was as spotless as always, her parents existing in a space that was incredibly clean and mildly cluttered, though Jess knew that everything on the island – magazines and mugs, open post and biscuit tins – was cleared away at the end of each day. She wondered what new routines Felicity would develop, both on her own and with Spade, now she had the physical and emotional freedom to do what she wanted.
‘Actually, Mum, Dad,’ she said, and felt her mouth dry out. ‘Before that, I—’ She swallowed. ‘I know I’ve pulled away a bit, recently.’ She put her glass down. ‘Notthatrecently, actually.’
Edie and Graeme exchanged a glance.
‘We have noticed, love,’ Graeme said. ‘You’ve always been independent, though.’
‘It was more than that. I overheard you. With Celine.’
‘When was this?’ Edie asked.
Jess shrugged. ‘A couple of years ago.’
