Page 76 of Holiday Love
His jaw tightens and his hands ball into fists as his body goes rigid. He grits out, “It fuckingpisses me offbecause that version isn’t true.”
I lean back, shocked by the anger radiating off him, how his face flushes red. Jamie almost never loses his cool.
“You saved me as much as I saved you. I was all alone, left by parents who mistake money for affection, until I met you. Suddenly you were in my life, and I wasn’t lonely anymore. You’remybrother, man. The closest thing I have to real family, so stop freezing me out. Okay?” He points at me, fierce and a little pleading. “You can change, become better, without leaving me behind. You want to join the Coast Guard? We’ll join the motherfucking Coast Guard.Together.”
My throat tightens, but he’s not done.
“You want to grow up? Fine. Welcome to the new, more responsible Jamie. Less drugs, drinking, and sex.” He wags a finger at me. “Notice I didn’t say none of those things, just less.”
“Wait.Wait.” I hold up my hand, trying to wrap my head around what I’m hearing. My voice comes out rough, words fighting to get past the knot in my throat. “Are you serious?”
“What?” His voice cracks. “You’re the only one allowed to have an identity crisis? That’s why I’ve been in a crap mood recently. I’ve been worrying about the future, too. Scared I’ll end up as some entitled asshole, just like my parents. So yes, I’m fucking serious. I’ll do it with you. The whole thing. I need it just as much as you do.”
Tears prick my eyes, blurring my vision, as emotion chokes me up, but I hide it—worried he’ll call me out, make fun of me—but then I see his eyes shining too. He angrily wipes his nose like it’s just allergies, and it hits me like a wave: this whole damn journey? It’s going to be so much easier with him beside me.
“Shut up. I’m not crying,” he mutters hoarsely.
“Me either,” I sniff. “It’s just…I fucking love you, man.”
“You too, you idiot.” He swipes at his eyes. We spend the next few minutes trying to get hold of ourselves, studiously not looking at each other. Finally, Jamie blows out a breath. “Now that we’ve figured out our lives, how do we get you that lady out there?” He jerks his chin toward Helen, who’s still battling wave after wave.
I follow his gaze, pride blazing in my chest as I watch her. She’s relentless. Fierce.
“Remember that Christmas in July party we threw a few years ago?”
Jamie raises an eyebrow. “The one with the inflatable reindeer, the piña coladas, and the incident with the fire alarm?”
“That’s the one.” A small smile tugs at my mouth. “It gave me an idea. For Christmas Day. Something simple but big, you know? Something she’ll never forget.”
Jamie studies me for a second, then grins. “You want to impress her with heartfelt holiday mischief. Say no more, I’m in.”
I laugh. “Of course you are, but it has to stay a secret.”
He rubs his hands together. “You know Ilovea good secret.”
I smile back, remembering all the trouble we’ve gotten into together over the years. All the secrets we’ve kept just between the two of us. “Oh, I know you do. This one’s going to be a doozy.”
Chapter thirty-three
One Year Ago
New York City
Helen
The club Teddy takes me to is in Chelsea. He says his friend Jamie told him about it. It’s perched on a narrow rooftop with a stunning view of the Empire State Building.
I point at the multitiered structure over his shoulder and shout in his ear to be heard over the pulsing beat of the DJ spinning at the front of the room. “You can check another New York City icon off your list.”
He turns to me, a grin stretching across his face. “Times Square, the Brooklyn Bridge, and the Empire State Building all in one night. Not bad, right?”
“Well.” I pretend to inspect my nails, which is hard to do because we’re being jostled by people who dance all around us. “Youdohave an incredible tour guide.”
He slides his arms around my waist, tugging me up onto my toes. “The most beautiful, smartest, funniest,wonderfulesttour guide.”
I blush. No one has ever given me so many compliments in such a short amount of time. My first instinct is to argue, to explain how I’m not actually the best at anything, but I don’t.
Not tonight.
