Page 76 of Royal Pain
Chapter 26
Belinda
The little ones are asleep. Both decided to stay in one room together, cuddled up in each other’s arms. Zan and I tucked them in and kissed them good night. I saw it on their faces. The sad look that comes from missing a father. I’m not sure they realize he’s never coming back, but they know for certain something has changed their mother. Princess Monifa is dealing with her own grief while trying to figure out how to help each of her children.
We’re all trying to help her any way possible, but I see that it only goes so far. She’s not just a princess. No matter what people think, she’s simply a grief-stricken woman.
I’ve thought about it a lot this week. How everything, even grief, would be watched and talked about. How under a microscope we’d be. That’s hard to get past. I think I could navigate most other changes fairly gracefully, because I love Zan so much. But we are going to be together regardless. And so far, nothing has made as strong an argument against the idea.
Not being able to include my best friend in what’s really going on in my life has been hard. Soraya would keep the secret, but Zan asked me not to tell anyone. Not even my parents. The real dealings of the Monarchy must be protected. But I’m dying to call her and get her take on the drama that’s unfolding.
This is the first time in my life I’ve had to rely on myself alone. No other person’s input will guide me. It’s a strange feeling. But I see there’s power there too. If I navigate this solo, I’ll grow as a person and from here on I’ll be a stronger woman.
No matter what I’m doing, I’m halfway inside thoughts of becoming his wife, and in which setting we will be. Nubia and Zan are watching some sports show on TV while I make sure the boy has towels in his room. There’s a soft rap on the door.
“Oh, hi. What’s up?” I say to Nubia as he enters the room. “Did your program end?”
“Yeah. Uncle Zan is shutting off the lights.”
“I’ll be out of your hair in a minute. Just putting some towels in here.”
“What do you think about him becoming the king?”
The question comes out of the blue.
“Well, I’m trying to figure that out. What do you think?”
“I think he’d be a good one.”
I take his words and try to imagine them coming true.
“I heard a man on some program talking about who would be the best choice for king, and he said it was Uncle Zan because he’s already done a lot for Mozia.”
“That’s true,” I say, crossing to the foot of the bed. I sit and he joins me.
“I wish my dad could talk to you. He would have told you what he thought about the brother who wasn’t really related to him.”
“You tell me.”
He gets this little grin as he talks about Tarik.
“He told me once that when he was a kid he heard Grandpa tell Grandma he had a dream. He dreamed Uncle Zan was sitting on the throne.”
Chills run up and down my spine. “Really?”
“I asked my dad if he felt hurt when he heard that. He said he didn’t because Grandpa was just telling what he saw in his dream. He knew Grandpa had the gift.”
“What gift?”
“He could see the future. It wouldn’t happen very often, but he never would ignore them. Sometimes he had to figure out what they meant.”
“Is that something that started when he was a child?”
“It didn’t start until he was twenty years old. His father came to him in a dream about Mansa sitting on the throne.”
Oh my God. I’m not about to tell Nubia about Zan’s dream. He’d be excited, but he doesn’t know I’m trying to figure out the rest of my life. But this one new bit of information begs the question. Does he have “the gift”?
If so the dream means that he is going to be king. So this whole thing may be a foregone conclusion. But I won’t let that influence my decision making.
