Page 32 of Man Cuffed
“The...what-holding?” My new friend looks confused.
“Never mind,” I say quickly because Maguire and Rosie are just joining us. There’s also a woman with them who is round and soft and smiling, and a bald man behind her wearing the worst sweater I’ve ever seen. This dude has made some interesting fashion choices.
Rosie sits right next to me on the love seat, and then motions for Maguire to join us. “Come on, brother,” she says. “Sit next to yourgirlfriend. There’s plenty of space if you don’t mind being cozy. Which you don’t because you loooooooove each other and all.”
Rosie’s eyes are glittering. And Maguire has turned a peculiar shade of red.
And that woman and man who entered the room with Rosie and Mac...it occurs to me that there’s a family resemblance.
And…
Oh. Oh! Rehearsal time is over, obviously. This is my premiere as Maguire’s girlfriend. I think I’ve just met the parents.
I give Maguire a quick look and he gives me the slightest of nods. “Mom, Dad, this is Meg. Meg…”
He’s not able to finish the sentence because his mom shoves him out of the way and bends down to give me an enormous hug. Suddenly I’m enveloped in mom-bosom and the scent of roses. And also some kind of scarf thing. I try to hold my breath, but then I just give in and breathe. It’s actually kinda comforting. She must wear essential oils.
“Oh, Meg! I can’t tell you what a pleasure it is to meet you! We thought Maguire would never get over…”
This time Maguire interrupts by gently moving his mom to the side and then snuggling in next to me on the glider. With Rosie on the other side of me, it’s sort of like trying to shove your hand in a can of Pringles. There just isn’t enough space. So in a fluid motion, he does some kind of maneuver and I’m suddenly sitting on him. On his lap. I wiggle a little bit. He coughs uncomfortably.
Maguire is not an actor. Maguire is as stiff as a board. Like his whole body is stiff. If we’re going to pull off the whole we’re-dating thing, this dude’s got to loosen up.
So I grab his arms and wrap them around me. And then I lean back, turn a little bit, and lay a quick, soft kiss on his lips.
Well, it’s supposed to be a quick one, but as soon as my lips touch his, his arms constrict a bit, as if he doesn’t want me to go anywhere. The glider rocks gently, exaggerating our motion.
Holy shit. His lips feel good. His arms feel amazing. His lap is my new favorite place in the world. The glider sways beneath us. I think I actually moan a little bit.
Rosie applauds.
His mom sighs.
Maguire releases me.
Pity. I have to shake my head to escape the hormone haze. I almost forgot I was performing here. “What were we talking about?” It’s a serious question. I feel breathless and flustered.
Suddenly, Aubrey is back, holding onto an enormous platter of food. I think she’s brought that platter to share, but then she digs in and I realize, nope that’s just for her. Gosh, I like her. “Meg was telling me that she’s an actor extraordinaire and I was just about to hire her to do a flash mob thing for me,” she gushes. “This needs to be anevent.”
“Do you do stuff like that?” Maguire asks, sounding genuinely interested.
“I haven’t done this exact thing, but I could. I can totally do this.”
This time it’s Aubrey who claps. “I just knew when you two walked in the door that something big was going to happen!”
I laugh because there is something big that’s happening right now under my ass. And that something is Maguire. At least part of him that’s enjoying this charade. If I was really his girlfriend, we wouldn’t even make it home. My panties would hit his car floor before we even pulled away from the curb. I’d make him pull over in a parking lot and then straddle him and…
“No whimpering, Meg,” Maguire whispers. “You’re laying it on too thick.”
God. His gruff voice right in my ear! But he’s right. I am moaning. So I stop.
Shake it off again.
Aubrey takes a look at her watch. “Oh!” she exclaims! “It’s time for some shower games! I love shower games!”
“And that’s our cue to head out,” Maguire says. “Up, Trouble.”
For a second, I don’t realize thatTroubleis me. So I don’t get up. And the he pinches me on the ass. Is it weird that I like it? But I get up anyway.
